


Reflection

by Lady_Sage



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Hallucinations, Implied Sexual Content, Kingdom Hearts III Spoilers, M/M, Mild Language, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery, Slow Burn, mild violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-08-06
Packaged: 2020-01-06 22:13:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 67,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18397388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Sage/pseuds/Lady_Sage
Summary: When Lea and Isa were kids, they spent so much of their time sneaking into the castle at Radiant Gardens. Once they became apprentices, they then spent so much of their time trying to sneak out of the castle. When they did sneak out, they always went to the same spot. Their spot. The wall. It lined the edge of the gardens and looked over the vast valley. They could see everything from that spot. It made them feel so small compared to the rest of the world, but it also made them feel like the only two people in the world. Especially at night. When the moon was risen, and the stars were out. They were vulnerable to each other then and there; they had no secrets.Isa knows he’ll give anything to get that back. He’ll do anything to repair his friendship with Lea. Sure, things are normal enough between them now, but there’s still so much missing. So much that has changed. And he understands that things will never go back to exactly they were before, but the closer he can get, the better.The closer he can get…





	1. A Different View

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!! I am super excited to finally be contributing to this ship that I have absolutely fallen in love with. It takes place after the events of KH3 (so **SPOILERS** if you haven't finished playing yet) and follows Isa as he readjusts to a normal lifestyle, as well has his overwhelming feelings for Lea. Which, of course, he still has to decipher x3 Feelings are hard, man lol

The reflection shows a face he has been looking at for over a decade. A face he had known before—Before the _incident_. There’s still something different about it, though. An obvious sort of different, yet it somehow makes him unrecognisable. Even to himself. A feature he will have to live with forever. A feature of a person—a Nobody—he was finally able to leave behind. A feature that will be a permanent reminder to a time he only wishes he could forget. Perpendicular scars perfectly aligned across the bridge of his nose. Scars that form the look of an _X_. Scars that do not belong to him. They belonged to—To who he had been before. But he’s not that person—that Nobody—anymore. He’s his normal self. And that’s something he has to keep reminding himself of. The markings of his past do not define who he is now. And now…

 

Now he is Isa. Again, he is Isa.

 

He takes a deep breath and turns the faucet on to splash cold water on his face. He repeats this action a second time before drying his face. He takes one last look in the mirror before finally tearing his eyes—his teal eyes—away from it. He returns to his room to prepare himself for the day ahead. He has to act as if everything is normal. He has to be as okay as he can be.

 

He is okay. He’s more than okay. He’s Isa.

 

When he leaves the apartment, he heads straight for the clock tower. That’s where they always meet, after all. No matter the occasion, they meet at the clock tower. It’s their usual spot. The most normal thing about his life now. It’s routine and it’s exactly what he needs. Routine and—

 

“Isa, there you are,” Lea greets him as soon as he arrives outside the station. “What took you so long?”

 

And a certain redhead.

 

“Late start to the morning,” Isa says. “My apologies.”

 

Lea smiles wide. “Don’t worry about it. Just glad you made it in time.” He throws an arm around Isa’s shoulders. “Not that we would’ve left without ya, of course.”

 

Isa stumbles slightly at the force of the other’s weight. Lea has never really understood when to hold back. Isa doesn’t mind, though. He returns the smile, even if it’s just a small one. “Too bad. A day away from you would’ve been a relief.”

 

He chuckles. “Yeah, yeah, I know. I’m a pain in the ass. I got it.”

 

“You got it memorised, you mean?” Roxas announces his presence as he and Xion arrive. Lea swings himself and Isa around, his arm still wrapped around the other’s shoulders. Roxas laughs. “How could you forget the rest of your catchphrase?”

 

“You got a little bit too much sass now, Roxas,” Lea says. “I think I liked you better when you were quieter.”

 

Now Xion’s laughing. “Don’t tell us Axel was giving you a hard time again for being late even when you weren’t.” She shakes her head. “If you ask me, Axel is always just way too early.”

 

“Well, nobody did ask you,” Lea goes on. “Jeez, the both of ya are too feisty.”

 

Roxas folds his arms across his chest. “Please, you’re just mad because you can’t keep up anymore.”

 

“I call that a challenge. As soon as we get to the islands, Rox, you’re on.”

 

Xion shakes her head again. “You two are gonna kill yourselves on that obstacle course someday. Tell them, Isa.”

 

Isa jolts at the sound of his name. At the idea of being included in the conversation taking place. Usually, he remains in the background. He stays quiet and lets everyone else do the talking. He’s never had a problem with just listening. Plus, it’s safe to say there’s still a little bit of animosity between Roxas, Xion, and himself. That’s understandable, though, considering all he did. All the suffering he caused. So, he never expected them to forgive him right away. _You may not trust him now, but at least trust me and my judgement_. That’s what Lea said to them when Isa first came back. Lea never doubted him. Never gave up on him. Lea had been his light in the darkness from day one.

 

“Isa?” Lea says, bringing him back to reality. “You okay?”

 

“Oh.” He clears his throat. “Y-yes, I’m perfectly fine.” The redhead is still leaning on him, so Isa finally shrugs him off himself. “Shall we get going?”

 

With that, the four of them head inside the station and board the train that will take them to Destiny Islands. Master Yen Sid had rigged one of the routes so Twilight Town would always be connected to the Islands. Sometimes traveling by train is just easier than having to fly a Gummi ship back and forth.

 

The ride is filled mostly with Lea’s and Roxas’s competitive mockery. Isa subtly shakes his head at the two of them. They had become quite close friends under such strange and convoluted circumstances, yet it’s obvious their friendship is true. Isa can’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy. He knows he shouldn’t, but… Hmm. He recalls when he and Lea carried banter like that, but that was over a decade ago. Yet, he knows it can be the same again now, but something is holding him back. Something…

 

When he catches his reflection in the train window, he remembers exactly what.

 

When the train finally reaches the Islands, Isa is more than relieved. He’s relieved for the fresh air. The breeze. He had been starting to feel claustrophobic.

 

“It’s so good to see you all,” Naminé greets them with a big smile.

 

Xion returns the smile. “You say that like we don’t see each other often.”

 

Lea and Roxas both give her a quick _hello_ before they’re running off. Naminé is a bit taken aback by this, watching the two of them disappear before she turns back to Isa and Xion with a questioning look.

 

“Don’t mind them,” Xion says. “They’ve been challenging each other about the obstacle course the entire ride here.”

 

“I see.”

 

“Are the others here already?”

 

“Of course.”

 

With that, Xion runs off to join the rest of their friends. Naminé watches her as well before turning on Isa and focusing solely on him. “How are you feeling?” she checks.

 

“I’m…well,” he says.

 

“You don’t sound too sure about that.”

 

“Still adjusting.”

 

“Nothing wrong with that. Honestly, I’m still adjusting, too.”

 

“No offence, but it’s different for you.”

 

As soon as the words are out, he only wishes he can take them back. Instead, he swallows hard. Sometimes Isa would say things that he realises after may come across as cold. He never means it that way. Naminé seems to be the only one who’s able to see past that. And, of course, Lea.

 

“True enough,” she goes on. “It’ll get better, though.”

 

He nods, pausing. “Is Riku here this time? Or is he gone again?”

 

Now she smiles half-heartedly. “He’s gone again. He’s still trying to figure out a way to get to Sora and undo everything.” She lets out a heavy sigh. “He’s been through so much already; he really deserves a break.”

 

“He’s only doing what he believes needs to be done.”

 

“I know…”

 

“And how’s Kairi?”

 

“Oh, she’s doing much better.”

 

“That’s good, then.”

 

She nods her head. “C’mon, we should go join the others,” she then says. “I’m sure they’re starting to wonder what’s taking us so long.”

 

So, they make their way for the other Island. For the beach. Ventus, Aqua, and Terra are playing a game of frisbee. Xion is already in a full-blown conversation with Kairi, which Naminé ends up joining in on. And then Lea and Roxas are off competing against each other in the obstacle course set up on the other side of the dividing wall. After the final battle, Kairi had told them all about the races Riku and Sora used to participate in. Only ever against each other. When she had, Roxas and Ventus both thought it would be fun to recreate the course but make it more challenging. So, that’s exactly what they did. Now whenever there’s a disagreement of some sort, it’s only ever settled on the obstacle course.

 

“Hey, Isa,” Ventus greets him, cutting out of the frisbee game. “You wanna take a go on the course once Lea and Roxas are done?”

 

“If they ever finish, that is,” Isa says. “The whole train ride here was them prepping for this, so I have a feeling they’ll be a while.”

 

Ventus laughs. “Man, that’s so like them.” He shakes his head. “Fine. At least come play frisbee with Terra, Aqua, and me.”

 

Isa doesn’t argue with the offer. He joins their game of frisbee and the four of them play well into the afternoon. Until, that is, the rest of the girls want in. That’s when they make up a new game and split into teams: Ventus and Xion, Terra and Kairi, Isa and Naminé. Aqua agrees to step out to be the game’s mediator. Unfortunately, though, they don’t get far into the game before Riku returns to the island. It’s clear he’s not happy and Kairi is quick to go after him. As they’re disappearing back to the main Island, Lea and Roxas join the others.

 

“What was that about?” Roxas speaks up.

 

Ventus shrugs his shoulders. “Dunno, but it can’t be good.”

 

“We should call it a day,” Aqua says.

 

With that, she, Terra, and Ventus bid their farewells and head home. Naminé asks the rest of them to stay just a little while longer, which Lea doesn’t object to. They go to the bridge to sit by the paopu tree. Not Isa, though. He separates himself and opts to sit at the end of the dock. His dangling legs are just barely long enough for his bared feet to touch the chilled water.

 

Soon enough, Lea is sitting beside him. “Y’know, the water’s nice and all,” he starts, “but this sunset is nothing compared to Twilight Town’s.”

 

Isa pauses. “Do you ever miss Radiant Gardens?”

 

“Huh?” He scratches the back of his head. “I dunno. I guess. We can go visit anytime we want, though.”

 

“Do you ever think about living there again?”

 

“Honestly, not really. I like Twilight Town.”

 

“You just like the sea salt ice cream.”

 

He chuckles. “Ya got me there.” He then lets out a heavy sigh. “Man, we’ve been through a lot.” He places a hand on Isa’s shoulder. “How’ve you been holding up?”

 

“I’ve been fine.”

 

“C’mon, Isa, I know you a little better than that.”

 

He pauses. “I’m not sure what you expect me to say.”

 

Lea’s watching him. He’s not looking back, but he can tell out of the corner of his eye. He can feel his burning gaze. Lea does know him better than anyone; that much is true. He can see right through Isa. That hasn’t changed between twelve years ago and now. Most of the time, Isa is grateful for it. Grateful for not having to explain everything he’s feeling. For not having to put it into words. Sometimes, though, that’s exactly what Lea wants. He wants to hear it from Isa himself.

 

“You have to talk to me,” Lea speaks up. “I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”

 

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

 

“Nothing…at all?”

 

Isa shakes his head. “Like I said, I’ve been doing quite all right.”

 

“Yeah? Is that why you decided to sit here by yourself instead of joining the rest of us by the tree?”

 

Now he swallows hard. “I prefer the view from over here.”

 

“Pretty sure it’s the same.” He sighs again, pulling his hand away. Isa almost grabs it to bring his touch back, but he restrains himself. “I get it,” Lea goes on. “You’re not fully comfortable around Roxas and Xion yet. That doesn’t mean you should isolate yourself, though. That’s not gonna help anything. Ya gotta be their friend to—”

 

“I can’t do that if they don’t want that.”

 

He considers this. “I’ll talk to them.”

 

“You don’t have to.”

 

“And you shouldn’t have to sit here alone.”

 

“I’m not alone.”

 

Just then, Isa can swear he sees Lea’s cheeks turn a soft shade of pink. Huh. Perhaps it’s just a trick of the light. A glow from the setting sun. He doesn’t think too deep into it. Won’t let himself think too deep into it. Won’t let himself think about the stares and the smiles and the unnecessary touches…

 

“Think it’s time we go,” Lea speaks up again. “It’s getting late.”

 

“Have you heard anything about Riku or Kairi or—?”

 

He smiles half-heartedly, which is so unlike him. “No. All I can say is that Riku’s rescue mission isn’t looking too good.” He sighs before getting to his feet. “C’mon, it’s been a long day.”

 

Isa nods his head once and follows the redhead’s lead. They join the others by the small hut before exchanging farewells with Naminé. She leaves to catch up with Riku and Kairi while the others head for the train to return to Twilight Town.

 

The train ride is quiet this time. Roxas and Xion are speaking softly amongst themselves. Lea sits with Isa in comfortable silence. He sits maybe a little closer than he should be. Isa doesn’t mind. Soon enough, Lea’s resting his head on his shoulder and falls asleep. Isa still doesn’t mind. This is new. A welcome change to the last decade of solitude. Better to be close than to find himself emotionally distant. Even if he is trying to grow accustomed to emotions still.

 

“So, Isa, how are you enjoying Twilight Town?” Xion breaks the silence by breaking away from her conversation with the blonde.

 

Once again, Isa is taken aback by being addressed. “Oh. It’s a nice little town.”

 

“Do you miss Radiant Gardens?”

 

“I do. But I’m sure it’s so different now than it was before—” The words get caught in his throat. It’s still hard for him to come to term with the past, even if it’s more recent. “Before everything happened,” he says instead.

 

“Axel’s told us about all the trouble you two used to get into together,” Roxas speaks up. He pauses. “Well, actually, he said that he would always get into trouble and you would always be there bail him out.”

 

“That is true,” Isa says. “Lea was always dragging me along on his so-called escapades. I could never let him go alone because I knew he’d find himself in sort of trouble, no matter what precautions he may or may not have taken.” He shakes his head, chuckling under his breath. “He was quite reckless, although, I’d say he still is now, too.”

 

Roxas chuckles. “No doubt about that.”

 

The rest of the train ride is filled with idle chatter, except now Roxas and Xion are sure to include Isa in on it. It’s a strange change of pace, but welcome, nonetheless. Before any of them know it, they’re back in Twilight Town. Isa nudges Lea awake, and the redhead sits up to stretch himself out, yawning.

 

“Home already?” he says.

 

“You really slept the entire time?” Isa says.

 

Lea shrugs his shoulders. “Like I said, it’s been a long day.”

 

The four of them exit the station and bid their farewells before all going their separate ways. Except Lea doesn’t head in the direction of his place; he continues walking with Isa.

 

“Mind if I crash with you tonight?” he asks. “Your place is closer than mine.”

 

“Are you truly that lazy?”

 

He grins. “C’mon, you know you love my company.”

 

Isa shakes his head at him, but he won’t argue. He won’t disagree. Nor will he ever admit it. “Fine.”

 

So, they make their way for Isa’s apartment together. As soon as they get there, Isa sets up a bed for Lea and gives him a change of clothes.

 

“You actually gonna go to sleep already?” Lea asks.

 

“You said yourself that you were tired.”

 

“Yeah, that was before.”

 

Isa lets out a heavy sigh. “What’s on your mind?”

 

“Remember when we were kids and we would always sneak out of our houses and meet at the gardens?” He falls onto the couch with a content grin. “I know we got into all sorts of trouble, but man, we could’ve got into such worse trouble when you think about. We got away with so much…”

 

“We don’t need to sneak around anymore.”

 

“I know, but that kinda takes all the fun out of it.”

 

He shakes his head at him. “Stop being so ridiculous.”

 

“Stop being so uptight.” He pauses. “Y’know, you held a conversation pretty well with Roxas and Xion on the train,” he then says. “See? It’s not so hard.”

 

He freezes for a moment. “I thought you had been sleeping.”

 

He shrugs his shoulders. “Off and on, yeah, but that’s not the point. The point is that you were able to carry a conversation with them.”

 

Isa inhales sharply. “Do you need anything else? Because if you don’t, then I’m going to bed.”

 

“C’mon, don’t get mad.”

 

“I’m not mad.” He isn’t. “I’m tired.” He isn’t. “So, unless there’s something else you need from me—”

 

“I need your company.”

 

And there’s that grin again. Isa knows all too well that Lea thinks he’s smooth, and the fact that Isa’s trying his damnedest to hold back a blush only proves it. Then again, Lea isn’t smooth. He’s really just an idiot most of the time. But those times tend to transcend into flattery a lot, and he somehow manages to get Isa blushing.

 

“C’mon,” the redhead goes on. “When was the last time we really sat down and talked about…anything?”

 

“Today at the Islands,” he says.

 

“That doesn’t count.”

 

“How does that not count?”

 

“Why don’t you want to talk to me?”

 

“I never said that.”

 

Before anything else can be said between them, Lea reaches out to grab Isa by the wrist. He then proceeds to pull him down onto the couch with him. A part of Isa wants to resist the action, but a stronger part of him enjoys the fact that Lea’s trying so hard to make things as they were before. He knows it’s only fair he puts forth that same effort. So, he sits with him, which causes Lea to smile again.

 

 “It’s nice, isn’t it? Having made it to this point after everything we’ve been through.” He takes a deep breath. “It’s almost surreal.”

 

“Yes, I know what you mean.” He glances down at their hands, realising Lea has yet to release his grip on his wrist. “Do you miss how things were before?”

 

“I dunno. Maybe a little.” He finally lets go as he sits back on the couch and Isa can’t help but feel…disappointed. “At the same time, though,” Lea goes on, “it’s almost like I don’t remember enough of it to miss it.” He shakes his head. “That’s not true. I mean, of course I remember us.” He stops almost short, thinking. “Huh. How well do you remember our lives before the Organisation?”

 

Isa cringes at that word. “How can you speak of that so nonchalantly?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“How can you talk about—about—?”

 

“The Organisation?” He scratches the back of his head. “C’mon, Isa, it’s part of our pasts. We can’t just ignore the fact that it happened. It shaped us into who we are.”

 

He shakes his head. “I don’t want to think they made me who I am now.”

 

“But they did. I get that it’s hard to accept, but—”

 

“Stop it.”

 

Lea purses his lips as he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “Sorry.”

 

He takes a deep breath. “I am going to bed. Goodnight, Lea.” He stands up and heads for his room.

 

“Isa.”

 

He pauses in the doorway. “Yes?”

 

He’s quiet for a moment. Isa’s mind is racing and, for some reason, so is his heart. It’s still such a strange sensation. He wonders if Lea’s heart is pounding just as hard. If that’s why he’s taking so long to respond. Maybe he’s just as apprehensive as Isa is.

 

“Thanks again for letting me stay here,” Lea finally says. It’s not at all what he wanted to say. Isa knows him well enough to know this. He still lets it slide. “G’night.”

 

Isa doesn’t say anything else. Just retires to his room for the night, softly closing the door behind him. He rests his head against the doorframe for a moment before moving to his bed, climbing under the covers. The initial chill causes him to want to jump back out, but he remains. He settles. Tch.

 

Settling into this new life has been a mission of its own. Recovering from the last decade already isn’t as simple as he thought it would be. As he hoped it would be. He should’ve known better. Known it wouldn’t be easy. Especially for him. But, of course, it’d be easy for Lea. He’s just as likeable now as he was twelve years ago. Just as amiable. As for Isa… Well, he’s a bit rough around the edges now. Not as outgoing. It makes unable to help but wonder why Lea would want to put up with him. Why he wants anything to do with him. Lea. Damn it.

 

Isa’s supposed to be trying to sleep, but he’s wide awake. Wide awake and thinking about the fact that Lea is right on the other side of the wall. He’s so close. Yet, somehow, still not close enough.


	2. Testing

Isa doesn’t remember when he had finally fallen asleep, but he awakes to a pleasant scent drifting into his room. He throws the covers off and follows the scent out of his bedroom and into the kitchen. And that’s where he finds Lea. Wide awake at eight o’clock in the morning. Cooking.

 

“Are you trying to burn my house down?” Isa announces his presence.

 

Lea chuckles. “I can do that without any outside help, remember?”

 

“Are you claiming you still have power over fire?”

 

“Of course I do.”

 

He shakes his head as he steps up to him, looking over his shoulder. “You look like you actually know what you’re doing.”

 

“Don’t act so surprised.”

 

“I’m more surprised that you’re up so early.”

 

He laughs even more. “C’mon, stop being teasing the guy who’s cooking for ya.”

 

He can’t help the smile as he takes a step back. “Very well.” He then sits down at the table against the not-so-far wall. “How did you sleep?”

 

“Not bad.” He shrugs his shoulders, keeping his focus on the task at hand. “Your place is closer, but man, I was definitely missing my own bed. You seriously need to invest in a more comfortable couch.”

 

“Have you considered the reason I have a less comfortable one is to keep you from living on it?”

 

“See? This is what I’m talking about. Teasing.”

 

Now Isa can feel his cheeks warming up. “Perhaps you shouldn’t make yourself such an easy target.”

 

“Oh, is that all I am to you? A target? Tch. I’m offended.”

 

He rests his elbow on the table and his chin on the heel of his palm. He’s still smiling. He knows that tone of Lea’s voice, after all. “ _Target_ is such a dirty word,” he goes on. “You’re more like a—”

 

“Like a guy who’s gonna let you starve for being an asshole.”

 

“You wouldn’t let all this food go to waste.”

 

“That’s what Roxas and Xion are for. I’ll call them over and feed them instead.”

 

“Fine.” He sits back in the chair. “So be it.”

 

Next thing he knows, Lea is placing a plate of food down in front of him. Isa looks him at him just in time to catch that cocky grin as he’s turning around. “Y’know, you’re lucky I’m such a nice guy,” he says as he makes a plate for himself before sitting across from Isa. “You’re welcome.”

 

There’s something in his eyes; in the way he’s looking at Isa. Something in the set of his smile. Lea’s teasing him, but he’s doing so in a different way. A new way. Or maybe Isa’s just reading too deep into it. He is still adjusting to having a heart again, after all. Sure, as it turns out, he and the other members had had their hearts all along and were just deceived, but he still went over a decade believing he didn’t have a heart. So, it’s going to be an adjustment either way. He’s still getting used to it again. Getting used to _them_. Emotions. Feeling them and expressing them and deciphering them.

 

“You still with me?” Lea checks, bringing him back to reality.

 

Isa shakes his head. “Y-yeah. Sorry.”

 

He tilts his head, staring him down as he finishes his current bite of food. “How do you like it?”

 

“You’ve surprised me in many ways this morning,” he says.

 

He smiles again. “So, you like it?”

 

“Yes, Lea, it’s very good.”

 

There’s a certain sense of accomplishment in Lea’s face and in his posture as he continues eating. A sense of pride. Just another thing Isa tries not to read too deep into.

 

Once they’ve both finished eating, Isa moves to his feet, grabbing both of their emptied plates. Lea tries to stop him, but Isa insists, seeing as the redhead did all the cooking. Lea makes no complaints against that argument. As Isa is washing the dishes, something in the background starts to ring.

 

“What is that?” he asks.

 

“Oh, shit,” Lea says. “It’s that weird phone…thing.” He leaves the kitchen and returns with some handheld contraption. “Ienzo gave it to me. Roxas, Kairi, Riku, and the others have one, too. I dunno. I’m still getting used to it.”

 

“Just make that noise stop,” Isa goes on. “It’s maddening.”

 

He grins. “What? Gonna go berserk or something?”

 

Isa doesn’t find the joke funny in the slightest and he makes that clear by ignoring Lea’s remark completely. He refocuses on the dishes, a sense of relief sweeping over him when the ringing sound finally stops.

 

“Morning, Roxas,” he says.

 

“Hey, Axel,” Roxas’s voice sounds off. “You’re not home?”

 

“No, I stayed over Isa’s last night. His place is closer to the station and I was pretty wiped yesterday, so I didn’t feel like walking all the way back to my place.”

 

“You really are lazy.”

 

He chuckles. “Shut up. Now, what is it could you possibly need from me at nine o’clock in the morning?”

 

“Not me, Ienzo. He called me to let me know he had tried calling you earlier, but he never got an answer.”

 

“Hmm…” He scratches the back of his head. “I vaguely recall this thing going off earlier, but I think I thought I was dreaming or something.” He shakes his head. “Did he happen to say what he had been calling for?”

 

“No, but it seemed kinda urgent.”

 

“Damn it.” He sighs. “All right. I’ll call him.”

 

Roxas laughs. “Don’t sound so enthusiastic.”

 

“I’ll talk to ya later, Rox.” And he hangs up before letting out another sigh. “Urgent Ienzo is never good.”

 

Isa dries off his hands as he finishes washing the dishes. “What do you think it could be about?”

 

“Only one way to find out.”

 

He hits another button and the phone is ringing again. Isa steps up to him so he can see what’s going on. After another moment, Ienzo appears on the screen in Lea’s hand.

 

“Good morning, Lea,” he greets the redhead. “Isa.”

 

“Morning,” Lea says as Isa simply gives him a nod of his head. “What did you need to talk about?”

 

“Always straight to the point.” He clears his throat. “If it doesn’t pose as too much of an inconvenience, I need the two of you to come to Radiant Gardens. Even and I have been running some tests on each other considering our time in the darkness and we picked up on some peculiar data in our systems. When we ran the same tests on Dilan and Aeleus, we gathered similar results. So, I’d like to run the tests on the two of you as well to see if the similarities persist. If so, these results could give us quite some insight on the effects of darkness on the body after such a long duration of time spent in it.”

 

Lea cocks an eyebrow. “Negative or positive?”

 

“That’s what we’re not quite sure about yet.”

 

“Is Even gonna be there?”

 

Ienzo chuckles softly. “No, he has stepped out for the day. Oh, it might actually be a good idea to also bring Roxas and Xion along. They weren’t in the darkness nearly as long as the rest of us, so running the tests on them could give us some excellent results to use for comparisons.”

 

“Or it could deny the whole theory from the get-go,” Isa speaks up.

 

Ienzo nods. “Yes, that is quite possible, as well. So, could you come by?”

 

Lea shrugs his shoulders. “I guess.”

 

“Perfect. I’ll send Ventus to pick you all up. See you soon.” And he hangs up.

 

“This…phone,” Isa starts after a moment. “It’s a little—”

 

“Yeah, I don’t really like it that much, either,” Lea says with a shake of his head. He then takes a deep breath. “Well, guess we better start getting ready. I’m gonna have to stop by my place, though.” He gets to his feet and heads for the front door. “I’ll call Roxas again on my way. Let’s meet halfway after.”

 

“Very well.”

 

“See ya.” And he leaves.

 

Isa takes a deep breath as soon as the front door is closed. He then moves to the bathroom. He comes face-to-face with his reflection again. Just as he does every morning. For a while now, he’s been debating asking Ienzo if there’s a way he could remove the scar. Cover it up. Maybe today will be that day. He’s sick of looking at it, after all. It clashes against his teal eyes. Teal. They’re teal now. Not amber. Not yellow. Teal. Nothing can change that. No test result can reverse that.

 

Once he’s ready, he makes his way for Lea’s apartment. He gets there just as the redhead is walking out.

 

Lea smiles. “Hey, I thought we agreed on halfway.”

 

“Figured I’d be done before you seeing as you still had to walk all the way here.”

 

“It’s not that far.”

 

“Far enough, though, that it’s too far when you’re exhausted?”

 

He shrugs, still grinning. “What can I say? Anything to spend time with you.”

 

Isa holds back the blush by rolling his eyes at the redhead. They then make their way for Xion’s place to meet up with her and Roxas. Lea, having forgotten to call them, quickly lets them know what’s going on while Isa listens quietly. His mind is racing a mile a minute. Whatever tests Ienzo has come up have his anxiety rising. Just the idea of them alone… He’s already jumping ahead to the possible outcomes. What the results could mean. The effect they could have on him. Or Lea. Or their relationship. He shakes his head. He has to go through with this. No matter what.

 

Ventus arrives, and they all board the ship to make their way for Radiant Gardens. Most of the ride is taken up by conversation between Roxas, Xion, and Ventus. This is normal. Roxas and Ventus always chat about anything when they’re together.

 

“Still amazes how different their personalities are,” Lea speaks to Isa directly, keeping his voice low. His chuckle is low, too, and it causes Isa to flush a little.

 

“Just because they look the same, doesn’t mean they would automatically act the same,” Isa says. “Roxas wasn’t anything like Sora, either.”

 

“True enough.”

 

They don’t speak for the rest of the ride. And when they arrive in Radiant Gardens, they make their way straight for the lab.

 

“You think Even really isn’t gonna be there?” Lea asks.

 

“I don’t think Ienzo would lie about that,” Isa says.

 

Dilan greets them outside the lab and guides them inside. Now no one is speaking, Roxas and Xion are trailing behind Lea and Isa, seemingly to keep their distance from the other past Organisation member. It’s only an assumption, but Isa wouldn’t be surprised at the truth behind it. He’s almost surprised they spend any time with him, but he knows they only do so to spend time with Lea.

 

“Welcome,” Ienzo greets them. “I’m glad you could make it.”

 

“Not sure you gave us much of a choice,” Lea says. “All right. So, what exactly are these tests? What data is being collected?”

 

“Even and I discovered a certain mark in our DNA,” Ienzo begins, “that’s also within Dilan and Aeleus. The same exact mark. It may not seem like a big deal, but DNA is so intricate that it’s nearly impossible for the same mark so show up in two different people, let alone four. So, we have a theory that this mark came from spending over a decade in the darkness. And if it is a legitimate part of our DNA now, that means it is part of our genetic structure and it could influence us in some way or form. Much like how our genetics determine our hair colour or eye colour, this could determine—” He stops short, letting out a heavy sigh. “Well, that’s what we’re not so sure of just yet.”

 

“So, like…a darkness chromosome?” Xion speaks up.

 

“In a sense, yes.”

 

“Why are Xion and I here?” Roxas asks. “We weren’t in the darkness for that amount of time.”

 

“Exactly. I need to test you two to see if there’s any difference in the so-called _chromosome_ or if it even shows up in your DNA.”

 

“Oh. Right. That makes sense.”

 

“All right. So, I’ll test one at a time in the next room over. I’ll go and prep and you four can decide amongst yourselves who will go first.”

 

Silence falls upon them as Ienzo leaves the room through the door on the other side of the room. No one looks at each other.

 

“Whoever says _ladies first_ , I will hit,” Xion speaks up. “Don’t think I won’t.”

 

“We know you will,” Lea says. He gets to his feet. “Ah, what the hell? I’ll go first. Get it over with.” And he follows Ienzo into the next room.

 

Isa watches the door as it slides shut behind the redhead. He then takes a deep breath. It comes out with more of a shake to it than he had been anticipating. He’s nervous. There’s no doubt about that. A part of him had been hoping he and Lea would be able to get this over with together. Go through this together like they had gone through everything else together. He’s always better with Lea. Calmer. Happier.

 

“Are you feeling okay, Isa?” Roxas suddenly asks him. “You seem pale.”

 

Xion’s brow is furrowed. “Yeah, you don’t look so good.”

 

Isa shakes his head. Their concern almost seems genuine. “It’s just stuffy in here. Probably need some fresh air or something.” He takes another deep breath. “I’m fine.”

 

That’s the end of it. Neither of them asks any other questions. Show any more concern. That’s okay, though. He’s okay with that. He doesn’t need them to worry about him. And right now, he’s too busy worrying about Lea. He’s sure he’s perfectly fine, but that doesn’t stop the paranoia.

 

He doesn’t know how much time has passed when Lea finally walks back through those steel doors. His shirt is only halfway on as he’s in the middle of a conversation with Ienzo still, who’s trailing along behind him. Isa’s gaze falls to the redhead’s exposed midriff before falling the rest of the way to the floor. He’s now watching as his feet step closer and closer to him. Then there’s a hand on his shoulder and he lifts his gaze to meet green eyes. Those vibrant green eyes.

 

“Roxas volunteered to go next, and then Xion’s gonna go,” Lea tells him. “That okay with you?”

 

Isa nods. “Of course. That’s perfectly fine.”

 

Lea falls into the chair beside him with a heavy sigh. “Man, that was more intense than I had been expecting. I mean, not intense, but like…more intricate, I guess.”

 

“I’m sure Ienzo and Even are very thorough.”

 

“No kidding.” He slouches a bit and starts leaning towards Isa. “Oh, do you mind?” he checks. Isa is quick to shake his head in response, and Lea finishes the movement of resting his head on Isa’s shoulder. This is becoming normal behaviour for the redhead, but Isa wouldn’t complain. He doesn’t complain. He enjoys the contact. “That wiped me out,” Lea goes on. “Might have to spend the night at your place again.”

 

Isa knows he’s grinning without even having to look at him. He can hear it in his tone of voice. “What if your place ends up being closer?”

 

“Then you can feign exhaustion and stay with me instead.”

 

Isa can’t help the smile. The light blush on his cheeks. “Perhaps I will.”

 

He doesn’t know what any of this means, and he’s too afraid to ask. This banter is a step up from what he and Lea used to tease each other about. It’s more playful now. Somehow, less harmful. And it causes something to stir within the pit of Isa’s stomach. Causes his stomach to somersault. But these feelings are still too new for him to fully understand them. To fully grasp the concept of them.

 

Roxas comes out and Xion goes in. Roxas doesn’t hang around, though. He leaves the lab to spend some time with Ventus around the small town. Isa doesn’t complain about this, either. He prefers to be alone with Lea. Even if Lea is—

 

“Are you actually sleeping this time or are you just faking it again?” Isa speaks up after a while. “Because no conversation will be happening for you to eavesdrop on.”

 

Lea chuckles before sitting up, causing Isa to instantly regret saying anything. Lea yawns and stretches. “I dunno. I am pretty tired, though.”

 

“Maybe you should go get some fresh air.”

 

“Nah, not until you’re done with your tests.” He looks over at the other and smiles. “I’m not leaving you alone.” Isa looks back for a short moment before tearing his gaze away. Lea chuckles again, leaning his head back as he closes his eyes. “There’s a part that may hurt a bit. It’s a weird kind of hurt, though. Like, you won’t realise it hurt until after the initial act of the hurting. I dunno.”

 

“You make absolutely no sense.”

 

He bursts out laughing. “C’mon, you should be able to follow me by now.”

 

“And you should be able to speak like a normal person by now.”

 

“Except there’s never been anything normal about us.” His head drops back down to Isa’s shoulder. “Not sure about you, but that’s never bothered me. Being normal is boring. If I’m not normal—”

 

“People will _get you memorised_ better?” Isa finishes for him.

 

He grins again. “See? You get it.”

 

Just then, Xion returns to the room. She leaves the lab like she already knew Roxas had gone off with Ventus. Lea sits up once more, but Isa is reluctant to take his turn.

 

“Are you ready?” Ienzo asks him.

 

“You’ll be fine,” Lea says. “Trust me.”

 

Isa nods his head and joins Ienzo in the next room over. He glances over his shoulder as the steel door slides shut, separating him and Lea once more.

 

“Relax. It’ll be over before you know it,” Ienzo says. “Then you and Lea can return home to Twilight Town.” He pauses. “Your cooperation will also help it go by faster.”

 

He gives another nod of his head. “What do you need me to do?”

 

“I need you to remove your shirt. Then I need to step onto the platform behind you.”

 

Isa does as he’s told, pulling his shirt off and tossing it onto the nearest table before taking a step onto the platform. Ienzo joins him for a moment to connect some wires to both of his wrists and on both sides of his neck, right at the collarbone.

 

“I’m going to put you through a sort of simulation first,” Ienzo goes on. “Something that will test your heartrate and anxiety levels.” He steps off the platform. “You can use the bar in front of you to help steady and balance yourself, if need be. You might get a little disoriented.”

 

He swallows hard. “Okay.”

 

He crosses to the other side of the room. “Ready?”

 

“As I’ll ever be.” And that’s when all the lights go off. Isa freezes for a moment. “Did you lose power?” he asks. There’s no response. “Ienzo? Is everything all right? Did something go wrong?” Still no response.

 

He takes a deep breath. Of course. Everything is perfectly fine. This is just part of the test. The simulation. Checking to see how he reacts to being in complete darkness. Not well, apparently. Isa abhors the dark. Even when he sleeps now, he makes sure to have some source of light. He doesn’t enjoy being left alone in the dark. And now he’s trying not to think about that. Trying to remind himself that this isn’t true darkness. Trying to keep his heart from pounding out of his chest. He squeezes his eyes shut, but he sees flashes of yellow when he does. So, he opens them, but it’s still just as dark. Maybe even darker now. He reaches in front of himself, searching for the bar. He finds it and grips it tight. He can feel himself shaking. His palms are sweating. His knees are going weak. Damn it. How much longer is this supposed to last? He wants out. He wants it to be over. He can’t see, but he somehow still feels the room spinning. He feels like he can’t breathe. He gasps for air, his head dropping. His throat is way too dry. Scratchy. He squeezes his eyes shut again. More flashes of yellow. This time, though, when he opens them—

 

Light.

 

“Isa?” Ienzo calls out. He sounds concerned.

 

He blinks a few times, allowing his vision to readjust. To refocus. Once he finally stops seeing double, he realises Ienzo is…taller than him. Huh. He looks down at himself. He’s still holding onto the bar, but he had dropped to his knees at some point. He can’t recall when.

 

“Isa, are you okay?” Ienzo checks. Isa only nods in response, and Ienzo helps him back to his feet. “Don’t do so well in the dark anymore, do you?”

 

He lets out a dry chuckle. “What gave it away?” His throat still hurts. Like he had been screaming for a decade.

 

“Honestly, you had the worst reaction out of you, Lea, Roxas, and Xion.” He flips through a couple pages on his clipboard. “Lea handled it only a little better. Xion actually handled it the best.” He places the board down and removes the wiring from Isa. “There’s water on the table.”

 

Isa carefully steps off the platform, stumbling a bit, his knees still feeling shaky. He drinks the water like he’s been parched for a decade. Then he collapses to the floor.

 

“Isa,” Ienzo calls out once more. He rushes to his side. “You have to tell me right now if you’re not feeling well.”

 

“You just sent me into a full-blown anxiety attack and you wanna know if I’m okay?” He scoffs. “You’re supposed to be the scientist.”

 

Ienzo seems almost surprised by this response. “That may have been a little worse than just a regular anxiety attack.”

 

“Then please tell me there aren’t any other simulations.”

 

“No, there’s not. I just need to draw some blood and you’ll be all set.”

 

He nods. “Can Lea come in?”

 

A soft smile graces Ienzo’s troubled expression. “Of course.” He gets to his feet and walks away.

 

Isa reaches for the table to pull himself up. Once he’s on his feet, he pauses. He closes his eyes and takes a deep, steady breath. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. And he repeats this pattern until there’s a hand on his shoulder. He opens his eyes to see Lea standing beside him. He’s smiling, but there’s something different about it.

 

“You need to sit for this next part,” Lea speaks up. “C’mon.”

 

He wraps an arm around Isa’s waist, pulling Isa’s arm around his shoulder. He then helps him to the closest chair as Ienzo prepares two needles and two vials.

 

“I need two samples,” Ienzo says. “Then I suggest you go straight home and rest for the day. That means no ice cream stops.”

 

Lea chuckles. “C’mon, some ice cream might be good for him.”

 

Ienzo shakes his head before focusing his attention back on Isa. “Hold out your arm.” Isa continues to follow his direction. “You’ll feel a slight pinch when the needle punctures your skin.”

 

Isa closes his eyes and turns his head away as Ienzo brings the syringe to his arm. Before he feels the pinch, though, he feels a hand on the back of his neck. He opens his eyes to find himself staring into Lea’s green ones. He’s not sure when he got so close. But there’s a grin on his face, like he’s trying not to laugh.

 

“What’s so funny?” Isa asks.

 

He shakes his head. “N-nothing. Sorry.”

 

Isa doesn’t say anything else. Instead, he closes his eyes again as he allows his forehead to fall forward and connect with Lea’s. The redhead adjusts his hand ever so slightly so it’s on the side of his neck, and his thumb his softly stroking Isa’s jawline.

 

Isa never feels the pinch.

 

Ienzo soon clears his throat. Isa and Lea both jolt a bit before looking up at him. “You’re all set now. I am going to get you another glass of a water and a small snack to eat before you go, though.” And he walks away.

 

Lea’s hand falls away from Isa. “That wasn’t so bad,” he says. He then gets up and walks in the direction Ienzo disappeared in.

 

Isa takes another deep breath. He looks towards his shirt on the table only about two or three feet away. It looks so far right now. He decides to wait. Then Lea and Ienzo return, and Lea’s the one passing along the water and snack. As soon as he hands it off, though, he walks back over to Ienzo. Isa observes them as they speak quietly with each other. He tries to read Lea’s gestures, but he’s purposely making them smaller. Discreet.

 

“Don’t discuss me like I’m not right here,” he speaks up.

 

They freeze, falling totally silent. Then Lea walks over to him and kneels in front of him, resting his arms on his legs. “You feeling any better?” Isa pauses before shaking his head in response. Lea smiles half-heartedly. “C’mon, let’s get going, then.” He gets to his feet and walks over to the table, grabbing Isa’s shirt and tossing it to him. “So, how long till we get to hear about the results?” he then asks Ienzo as he places a hand on the small of Isa’s back before he can actually get his shirt all the way on. The touch of Lea’s hand against his skin causes his breath to hitch. “Couple days?”

 

“More like a couple weeks,” Ienzo says. “Even and I will look over everything and make our comparisons, and then we’ll take it from there. I’ll be in touch as soon as the results have been finalised.”

 

“Sounds good.” He lifts his hand, allowing Isa’s shirt to fall the rest of the way over his back. “Guess we’ll talk to ya later, then.”

 

With that, they finally leave the lab. Isa is grateful for the fresh air. For the sunlight. He breathes deep and Lea laughs at him.

 

“Man, your tests did not go well, did they?” Lea says.

 

“That was awful,” Isa says. “I hope I never have to do anything like that again.”

 

“Hey, you guys are finally out,” Ventus calls to them as he, Roxas and Xion make their appearance. “Seems like you took a lot longer, Isa.”

 

“Nah, we just got caught up in chatting with Ienzo,” Lea tells them. “Sorry.”

 

Xion tilts her head. “You still don’t look all that great, Isa.”

 

“Yeah, that’s why we’re gonna head straight home,” Lea goes on. “He’s got some resting he needs to do.”

 

“But we’re not ready to leave yet,” Roxas says.

 

“I don’t mind making two trips,” Ventus says. “I’ll bring you guys home now, and then I’ll bring you two home when you’re ready.”

 

“Axel, don’t you wanna stay?”

 

Lea smiles sheepishly. “You know I’d love to, but I really wanna make sure Isa gets home safe.”

 

Xion puts a hand up before Roxas can make his disapproving rebuttal. “Of course, Axel, we understand.” She smiles. “Maybe another time.”

 

With that, Lea, Isa, and Ventus make their way back to Twilight Town. Ventus drops the two of them off outside the train station, and they offer him a quick goodbye before he takes off again. Lea glances up at the clock tower.

 

“One stop won’t hurt, right?” he says.

 

Isa shakes his head. “You can go on up if you would like. I’m still feeling dizzy.”

 

“Not the same alone.” So, they head into town. “Do you want me to stay at your place or would you like to stay at mine?”

 

“It’s fine. You don’t have to keep an eye on me.”

 

“According to Ienzo, you’re far from fine.”

 

“I still don’t need you watching me like I’m a child.”

 

“Whoa…” Lea puts his hands up, as if surrendering. “What the hell is with the attitude all of a sudden?”

 

Isa sighs. “Sorry, I just—I’m tired.”

 

“Let’s get you home, then.”

 

They make their way for Isa’s apartment. Lea keeps their pace slow. Steady. It’s obvious Isa is still shaky. Weak in the knees. He’s not entirely sure why he hasn’t fully recovered yet. It doesn’t make any sense to him. There was just something about that test. About those flashing yellow lights. Yellow eyes…

 

“Isa?” Lea speaks up. That’s when he realises he’s stopped walking. He’s reaching for the nearest wall to catch his balance, but Lea catches him first. “Hey, careful.” His grip is tight on Isa’s shoulders. “Sorry, but there’s no way in hell I’m leaving you alone tonight.” Isa only nods as he holds onto Lea in return. “Yeah? You’re okay with that now. Good.”

 

They make it the rest of the way to Isa’s place and Lea gets him onto the couch as quickly as he can. He then moves into the kitchen to grab a glass of water. He brings it to Isa, kneeling before him rather than sitting beside him. Isa downs the water, once again feeling as if he hasn’t had a drink in over a decade.

 

“What happened during that test?” Lea asks once Isa puts the empty glass down on the end table. “It’s not like you to not recover swiftly.”

 

“Just…bad anxiety,” Isa says. “No need for you to worry.”

 

He raises an eyebrow at him. “Uhm, you’re kidding, right? C’mon, you can barely walk straight, let alone keep your balance. And you expect me not to worry?”

 

He can’t help but smile. “You’re far too considerate.”

 

Lea returns the smile. “You should get to bed. Or at least lie down.” He rises to his feet before helping Isa back to his own. He then leads him to his room. He gets Isa settled into the bed and huffs. “All right. I’ll be on the most uncomfortable couch if you need me for anything.”

 

Isa’s eyes are already closed. “Anything?”

 

“Anything at all.”

 

The sound of Lea’s voice is probably more soothing than it should be to him. He tries to tell himself it doesn’t matter. That it doesn’t mean anything. “I’ll hold you to that.”

 

He chuckles a bit. “I’d expect nothing less.”

 

He hears Lea’s footsteps as he walks away, and the door closing behind him. That’s when Isa opens his eyes. He watches the door, wondering if the redhead will stroll back in. He stops himself from calling him back in. He has no reason to. No reason other than wanting his company. His presence. He wants to tell him that he doesn’t have to sleep on the most uncomfortable couch. That he doesn’t mind sharing his bed. Before he’s able to remember how to use his voice, though, his eyes are drooping shut again…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't make fun of me for this chapter x3 I did enjoy science back in high school (like, 7 or 8 years ago now--how ironic), but I'm not sure if I conveyed accurately the whole aspect of the testing and marker and whatnot idk lmao it's just for a story, right? Although, if someone out there understands how I can make it better (if need be), feel free to let me know, haha


	3. Nothing

Isa awakes to the smell of brewing coffee. He sits up in his bed, gazing over at the empty, untouched side. He lets out a small sigh before slowly making his way out of his room. He finds Lea sitting at the table in the kitchen, his elbows resting on it and his head in his hands. He sits across from him, startling him into an upright position.

 

“Morning,” Lea greets him, clearly not happy. “You look like you slept well.”

 

“Better than you, at least,” Isa says.

 

“Yeah, uh…” He clears his throat. “Don’t worry about it.” He lets out a short sigh. “Ienzo called. He said to take it easy on the coffee for a couple days. He also said to eat whenever you’re able to today, but to eat in smaller and lighter portions.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Figured some toast would be good enough to start the day.”

 

“When he says to take it easy on the coffee…?”

 

“No coffee for at least three days.”

 

He groans. “Make sure I don’t see Roxas or Xion for three days, then.”

 

“C’mon, don’t be like that.”

 

He cocks an eyebrow at the redhead. “You know quite well how unpleasant I am without coffee.”

 

He grins in response. “You’re unpleasant with the coffee, too.”

 

He pauses. “I should’ve known you were going to say that.”

 

Now he laughs. “Are you feeling any better?”

 

“I suppose… I can already feel a headache coming on.”

 

“Ugh. Yeah, the only words out of your mouth for the next three days are gonna be words of complaints. Hmm.” He glances over at the coffee pot. “Maybe one cup won’t hurt. Just one, though. And if Ienzo finds out—”

 

Isa smiles. “Of course. It’ll be our little secret.” Lea smiles again in response as he gets to his feet and pours two cups of coffee. Isa’s is a significantly smaller cup, but he lets it go. He takes a sip. “What kept you up?”

 

Lea takes a deep breath. “Naminé and Kairi called me last night. Riku left that same night he came back. Now they haven’t heard from him since then and they can’t even get in touch with him, so they were freaking out and I had to calm them down. Once I did, I tried reaching out to Riku myself and I did manage to get a hold of him, and then had to basically talk him off a ledge.”

 

“So, it wasn’t my uncomfortable couch?”

 

He chuckles half-heartedly. “No, it wasn’t that awful couch. Hell, when I was talking to Riku, I had to step outside for a couple minutes because I was afraid that we were gonna end up waking you.” He shakes his head. “That kid’s putting way too much pressure on himself. I know he wants to save Sora and all, but Master or not, he can’t do it alone. And he refuses to let anyone help.”

 

Isa takes another sip of his coffee. “Sounds familiar.”

 

“Hey, there’s a difference between being stubborn and being reckless.”

 

“Yes, and you’re both.”

 

He sneers at him, although there’s no real heat behind it. “Shut up.”

 

He chuckles behind the mug. “Either way, it’s a shame to hear he’s having such a rough time.”

 

“Yeah…”

 

They continue drinking their coffee in silence. When Lea finishes, he gets to his feet to pour himself a second cup and throw two pieces of bread into the toaster. Then he opens the fridge and rummages around a bit.

 

“You’re like me,” he speaks up. “You seem to wait till the absolute last minute to go food shopping.”

 

“I hate grocery shopping,” Isa says. “Too many people.”

 

“Yeah, I’m not the biggest fan of crowds, either.” He closes the fridge. “Maybe we could just go together. Could get it done faster that way.” He sits back down at the table. “And I bet if we were to go first thing in the morning or right before the shops close, it wouldn’t be as crowded.”

 

He contemplates this little theory as he takes another small sip of his coffee. Nursing it. If it’s the only cup he can have all day, he sure as hell is gonna make it last. He continues thinking. Running scenarios through his head like he would with missions. He freezes. No. Isa didn’t set up missions. That hadn’t been Isa’s job. That was—

 

The toaster pops before he can come up with a response.

 

“Hey, man, you’re going pale,” Lea tells him, concern in his tone and in his eyes. It causes them to turn a darker green. “Am I losing you again?”

 

Isa shakes his head as he pushes the coffee cup away from him. “I-I’m fine. Sometimes I just think too much.”

 

Lea looks him up and down. He’s not buying the excuse. He always knows when there’s more to a story. He also always lets it go. Almost always. Right now, he seems considerate and willing enough to let it be one of those times. He gets up and grabs the toast. Isa can’t see what he’s putting on it, but he doesn’t care. Then the plate is being placed in front of him.

 

“What are you going to eat?” Isa asks.

 

“I’ll eat later.”

 

“Why can’t you eat now?”

 

“Never hungry first thing in the morning.”

 

Isa checks the clock and raises an eyebrow. “It’s nearly eleven o’clock.” He takes a bite of one of the pieces of toast. “Not really first thing in the morning anymore. And yesterday you were eating by 8:30 in the morning.” Lea shrugs his shoulders as he takes a sip of his coffee. Isa puts the piece of toast down and pushes the plate away from himself. “Fine. If you won’t eat, I won’t eat.”

 

“Don’t be so ridiculous.”

 

“Same to you.”

 

He sighs. “I just wish you would tell me what you’re thinking about when you _think too much_. I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”

 

“I know. You said that the other day at the Islands.”

 

“Well, maybe you should listen. I mean, I know it’s not the easiest thing in the world, but it’s me. This is you and me. Just like old times. Talk to me now like you would talk to me before.”

 

 _Except this isn’t just like old times_. He doesn’t dare say that aloud. “There’s nothing to talk about. Just like there was nothing to ever talk about before.”

 

He huffs as he gets back to his feet, practically throwing is half-empty coffee mug in the sink. He then drops his phone on the table. “I’m hanging out with Roxas today. Call him if you need to get in touch with me. I’ll talk to Ienzo later about getting you your own phone.” And he turns to leave.

 

“Lea,” he calls after him. He doesn’t have anything to say to him, he just knows he doesn’t want him to go.

 

He stops in the doorway. “Yeah?”

 

Isa swallows hard. He can’t make him stay. “Have fun.”

 

Lea leaves without saying another word. Isa drops his head into his hands. He stays like that for a long couple of minutes, breathing deep. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. When he lifts his head again, his gaze lands on toast with one bite taken out. He pulls the plate back towards him and finishes both pieces before dropping the empty dish in the sink. He then returns to his room, crawling beneath the covers of his bed. His head is pounding. He buries his face in his pillow as he pulls the blankets over his head. This is where he wants to be for the rest of the day…

 

Except there’s a ringing coming from a couple rooms over that pulls him back out of bed. Isa stumbles a bit before finding his centre and making his way for the kitchen. He’s not sure how much time has passed; he can’t seem to focus his gaze on a clock. Instead, he’s focusing on the ringing sound. He grabs the phone from the kitchen table and answers it as he falls into one of the chairs.

 

“Shit, Isa, it’s about time,” Lea says. “I’ve been trying to get a hold of you for at least two hours now.”

 

“Sorry.” He rubs his eyes with his free hand. “I forgot the phone in the kitchen and had fallen asleep.”

 

“Feeling any better?”

 

“I suppose.” Except his head is still pounding. The light hurts his eyes. “Is everything all right? I wasn’t expecting to hear from you today unless I reached out first.”

 

He sighs. “Just wanted to check in.”

 

“Well, I’m still in one piece.”

 

“Good.” He pauses. “If you’ve been sleeping all day, you probably haven’t eaten since I left, huh?”

 

Isa shakes his head, already knowing exactly where Lea is going with this. “It’s not your job to feed me.”

 

“Well, I have to stop by to pick up my phone anyway.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Might as well bring some food at the same time.”

 

“Don’t spend too much when I can’t eat too much.”

 

Now he grins and it’s a sight to see. “I’ll spend as much as I want to, and you won’t be able to stop me.” He looks over his shoulder. There’s a distant voice speaking to Lea. Isa can only presume it’s Roxas. “Hey, I gotta get going,” Lea then goes on, “but I’ll see you in a couple hours. Don’t ruin your appetite.” He winks at him teasingly before ending the call.

 

Isa sits and stares at the now black screen. He almost calls him back to ask him if he can come over sooner. Come over now. He can’t do that, though. Won’t do it. Roxas deserves time with Lea as well. Roxas and Xion both. Then again, Isa has over a decade of time to get back. To make up for. A decade of senseless arguments. Tiresome bickering. A decade of growing distant. Of falling prey to the darkness… Even when he believed he was too far gone, though, there was still a light. And he followed that light until he could touch it. Until he could feel its warmth. He had never thought that would be possible, but by then he also knew how wrong he could be. So, he touched the light and what he saw—Who he saw—

 

Lea said he hadn’t forgotten. That he would drag him home. And there’s no mistaking those green eyes. When Isa woke up, though, he had been back in the lab with Ienzo and Even. He had been completely and utterly disoriented, as well. They helped stabilise him and from there… Well, from there he knew he had to find Lea and tell him everything. Tell him the truth.

 

Now here they are. And Isa’s still trying to figure out the right way to tell him. With every interaction between them, though, it only gets more difficult. He thought it’d be the other way around, but again, he’s been wrong before. With every touch, Isa understands less and less of exactly what it is he’s feeling. Of what the truth is. All he knows is that he only wishes to spend all his time with Lea. Every moment. The next decade.

 

The front door opens then, and he realises he’s still holding onto the phone. He practically throws it down as he jumps to his feet. As he turns the corner out of the kitchen, he nearly crashes into Lea, who’s holding two bags of food.

 

“I wasn’t expecting you so soon,” Isa says.

 

“I called you, like, an hour ago,” Lea tells him. He chuckles. “Man, the hell have you been doing today?”

 

“Sorry, just a little out of it, I suppose.”

 

He puts the bags down on the table before taking his phone and pocketing it. From there, he starts pulling a bunch of containers out of the bag and spreading them across the table until both bags are empty. He tosses them out and turns back to the food.

 

“I thought I told you to go easy,” Isa says.

 

“And I told you I can do whatever the hell I want. After all, I’m the one with the steady job here.”

 

Isa can’t help but roll his eyes at him. “How is that job, by the way?”

 

“It sucks,” he says as he falls into one of the kitchen chairs. “Gotta be super proper and super polite just so people can scream at me when their order is wrong, and _it doesn’t taste right_. Tch. Like that’s my fucking problem. I mean, I’m not the one cooking it.” He shakes his head. “C’mon, I don’t wanna talk about work. It’s just gonna put me in a foul mood.” He gestures to the empty chair across from him. “Sit. Eat.”

 

Isa does so. Lea starts picking at food from at least four of the separate containers, but Isa sticks with one for now. He lets Lea do most of the talking, which is really just him telling him about what he did with Roxas that day. Isa inquires where Xion was, only to find out she had started a new job. And to his surprise, their day did not consist of them going to the clock tower at any point. Isa doesn’t bring this up. Maybe it’s suddenly a sore spot. He’s not sure he wants to find out. Still, Lea keeps talking, whether he has food in his mouth or not. He talks and it’s animated and open and Isa absolutely loathes the fact that the young man across from him had to suffer over a decade of mellowing out his quite expressive personality.

 

“Anyway…” Lea clears his throat. “What all did you do today? Why wasn’t I able to get a hold of you?”

 

“I told you, I had been sleeping,” he says.

 

“That’s really all you did?”

 

“Please, like you’ve never slept away the day before.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Besides, there’s not much else for me to do around here.”

 

“You could get a job.”

 

“Yes, you’re right. I could. That’s not the easiest thing to do, though.”

 

“Why not work with me? I could put in a good word for you.”

 

“Are you sure us working together would be a good idea?”

 

He chuckles. “Fine. Fair enough. Hmm.” He pauses, thinking. Then he puts aside the tiny container of food he’s currently eating out of. “Listen, about this morning… I wanted to apologise for how I left things. I shouldn’t have stormed out like that.”

 

Isa is taken aback by the sudden change of topic. It takes him a moment to process what’s being discussed before he tries to reply. “Y-you barely stormed out. And you don’t have to apologise—”

 

“I want to.” Lea takes a deep breath. “Y’know…it was so easy for me to stay mad at you before. And I know how shitty that must sound, but it’s the truth. It was. It was so easy. And now…” He shakes his head. “I don’t wanna be mad at you, Isa. I don’t wanna stay mad at you. I want us to be able to work through all the bullshit. But if that’s the case, then that means you have to talk to me, too. Okay? I mean, I spent the last decade listening to you tell me _nothing_. I’m not gonna take that as an answer anymore. Don’t be like that with me. Talk to me or else it’s not gonna get any better.”

 

Isa takes his words into careful consideration. Hell, he had just been thinking with himself about how he wants to tell Lea the truth. Whatever that may be…

 

“Isa?” he speaks up.

 

He looks across the table at the redhead. The look on his face takes Isa’s breath away. He tries to catch it before swallowing hard. “Why do they still call you Axel?” he then asks. Of all the things to say first, that’s what he decides on.

 

Now his brow furrows. “Huh?”

 

“You still have everyone calling you Axel. Why?”

 

“Oh, uh…” He scratches the back of his head. “I kinda told Kairi to call me that. Figured it would be easier, y’know? Plus, that’s pretty much how everyone already knew me.”

 

“Everyone had it memorised?”

 

“Heh. Exactly.”

 

“Fair enough. I suppose it also helps that you hold no resentment towards that name.” He wants to scoff but holds it back. “How fortunate for you.”

 

“Isa—”

 

“And the marks under your eyes,” he goes on. “You were able to remove them, just like that. As for me… Well, I have the memories of that dreadful time etched across my face.” He squeezes his eyes shut and sees flashes of yellow. He opens them again. “A permanent reminder.”

 

That’s when Lea gets to his feet and moves to the other side of the table. He kneels before Isa, much like he did after the testing in Radiant Gardens. He rests his arms across Isa’s knees just like before, as well. “Isa, I’m sorry you feel that way. That you have to live with that,” he says. “But I just want you to know that I don’t see you that way. Everything that happened in the past is done. It’s over. It doesn’t matter anymore. That’s not who you are anymore. You’re Isa again. And that’s how I see you. Even if you think you still look like him.”

 

“I do still look like him.”

 

“But you’re not him. You’re better than him.”

 

Isa squeezes his eyes shut once more. Except this time, there aren’t any flashes of yellow. This time, all he sees is vibrant green. And it’s comforting. It’s warming. It’s a feeling he never wants to lose. He never wants it to go away.

 

“I’m sorry,” Isa speaks up. “For everything.”

 

“C’mon, we both did things we’re not proud of,” Lea says. “We were also both given the chance to move on, though. So, let’s not waste it.”

 

Now he chuckles. “Since when are you such a sap?”

 

Lea laughs back. “Shut up. You’re still a jackass.”

 

“You say that like you don’t have your moments.”

 

“What can I say?” He shrugs his shoulders. “That’s what’s always made us such good friends.”

 

With that, they start cleaning up all the leftover food and empty containers. They’re both talking. Carrying out a balanced conversation. And it’s so _natural_. It’s everything Isa has wanted for the last decade. Everything he missed about the last decade. Everything he’s willing to hold on to.

 

His light in the darkness.


	4. Sunset Terrace

Over the course of the next few days, Isa starts feeling better and more like himself. That’s almost an odd thing for him to think, too. He feels like himself. Normal. Hell, he can look in the mirror without it turning into a fifteen-minute-long scrutiny of himself. And it feels good. It feels better than good.

 

It feels like _before_.

 

At the same time, though, Isa can’t shake the feeling that something is bound to bring it all crashing down. Just like before. Of course, that fear always seems to escape him when he’s with Lea.

 

“Have you heard from Ienzo?” he asks one afternoon while he’s visiting Lea at the bistro he works at. Afternoon hours are typically slow, so it’s easier for Isa to talk with him then. Otherwise, Lea’s running around like a mad man. “About the tests, I mean.”

 

Lea shakes his head as he cleans the table next to the one Isa’s seated at. “Nah, nothing yet. About us, at least. He called me about Roxas’s and Xion’s results.”

 

Isa finishes the sip of his coffee. “What conclusion did he come to with them?”

 

“They didn’t have the same mark or whatever. I dunno.” He throws the rag into the pail of soapy water that’s resting on a chair. “They’re different, to put it simply. In multiple ways. First of all, neither of them spent nearly as much time in the darkness as the rest of us did. Then Roxas is completely separate from his Somebody, which had an effect. And Xion is technically still only a replica, even if she acts human now.” He pauses. “Uh, that came out wrong. I mean, she is human. She does have her own heart now, but—”

 

Isa puts his hand up to silence Lea before he has the chance to descent into a rambling of madness. “I understand.” He takes another sip. “Nothing about you or me yet?”

 

He takes a look at Isa before letting out a small sigh. “I know you’re nervous about what Ienzo might find, but ya gotta relax.”

 

He stiffens a bit. “I’m not nervous—”

 

“You’ve been asking me about this almost every single day. You never ask so much about shit unless you’re thinking too much about it.” He turns a chair around and to sit across from Isa, his arms resting on the chair’s backrest. “Whatever happens, we’re gonna get through this. We’ll be fine. The results aren’t gonna change anything.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

“What are you talking about? That’s just how it is. C’mon, we’re not letting the bullshit get in the way.” He puts his finger to his temple as his lips form into a small smirk. “Got it memorised?”

 

Isa can’t help but chuckle, shaking his head. “You’re insufferable.”

 

His smirk turns into a grin. “Yet, you still put up with me.”

 

“For reasons I will never understand.”

 

“Axel,” a male voice then calls from the back. “I don’t pay you to sit around and chitchat with your friends.”

 

Lea gestures to the empty restaurant. “No one’s even here.”

 

“That’s what the mop and broom are for.”

 

He sighs. “Got it.”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

That’s when he jumps to his feet. “Yes, sir. I’ll get right on that, sir.”

 

“That’s what I thought you said.” And the man returns to the kitchen.

 

 Lea’s posture slackens again. “Man, that guy is strict.”  He shrugs his shoulder. “Oh well. Anyone is better than Xemnas.”

 

Isa cringes at the name, yellow flashing through his mind. He takes a deep, shaky breath. “I’ll take that as my cue to leave.” He gets to his feet, pulling money out of his pocket.

 

“You don’t have to do that,” Lea tells him. “I’ll take care of it for ya.”

 

Isa leaves the money on the table anyway. “Then consider this your tip.”

 

He grins again. “You’re too kind.” He pockets the money. “Fine, have it your way. But I’m using it to buy you something nice.” He winks at him.

 

Heat rises in his cheeks. “And why would you do that?”

 

“It’s my money now. I can spend it however I like.”

 

“You’re ridiculous.”

 

“Ridiculous. Insufferable. Tch. Got anything nice to say about me? Maybe a compliment of some sort?”

 

He only smirks. “Will I see you after work?”

 

“Oh, yeah, meet me at the station when I get out.”

 

“Clock tower visit?”

 

“Nah, I got something else in mind.”

 

He tilts his head, raising an eyebrow. “Will Roxas and Xion be accompanying us?”

 

Lea opens his mouth to respond, but his name—his other name—gets shouted from the kitchen again before he can. With that, he and Isa exchange a quick goodbye before Isa leaves the restaurant. He then heads back to his place. Lea has another couple of hours left to his shift, so he has time to relax before having to meet up with him at the station for whatever it is that he has planned.

 

When he gets home, he decides to take a shower. He turns the water on before undressing himself, leaving his clothes scattered across the floor. And when he steps into hot water, the first thing he does is tilt his head back. He allows the water to soak into his hair. When it’s wet, it reaches about halfway down his back. He keeps running his fingers through it as he focuses on breathing. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. Then he turns to face the showerhead, closing his eyes as he lets the water cover his face. He sees more flashes of yellow but tries to ignore the sensation. The dread. Instead, he wonders about what the redhead has planned. He just thinks about Lea in general. About his new life. About all that has changed. Things are better now this way. Better…

 

He stops his thinking and washes his hair. He’s gonna need more shampoo soon. One of the downfalls to having long hair. Once he’s out of the shower and looking at himself in the mirror, he considers cutting it. Maybe to his shoulders. Maybe till it’s gone. For now, though, he’ll leave it be. Hmm. But it is getting somewhat in the way… Soon enough, he finds himself braiding his hair. Yeah. That’ll do.

 

He gets dressed and checks the time. Lea’s shift doesn’t end for another half an hour. He considers meeting him outside the restaurant so they can walk to the station together. Pick up their conversation where they had left off earlier. After all, he still isn’t sure if Roxas and Xion will be joining them. Not that it would matter. Their presence wouldn’t make a difference. Lea always makes sure to include Isa one way or another.

 

He takes one last look in the mirror before heading out. One last look at—His gaze focuses on the scar across his nose. He breathes deep. No. It doesn’t bother him anymore. It’s not supposed to. He’s moved past it. The scar means nothing. It proves nothing. He closes his eyes as he takes another deep breath. Yellow flashes. Damn it. Why won’t those stop? He shakes his head and opens his eyes again. Except the eyes he sees staring back at him aren’t teal anymore. They’re—He jumps back in a panic, a lump forming in his throat. He rubs at his eyes. No. This isn’t possible. It’s can’t be. He keeps rubbing until he sees stars. And when he opens them once more, he sees teal. Relief sweeps over him. So much so, he almost falls over. He grips the vanity, though, keeping himself steady.

 

He’s okay.

 

By the time he finally gets out of his apartment, he figures it’ll be easier to just meet Lea at the restaurant. Even if he wants to go home and change first, Isa doesn’t mind waiting on him. Lea waited long enough for him; it’s all he can do to return the favour. Even if it’s in miniscule ways.

 

He approaches the restaurant just as Lea is leaving it. He spots Isa and smiles, waving at him. Isa can’t help but return the smile. He can’t help any of his reactions when he’s with the redhead. Everything is too natural. Comfortable. Not that’s he complaining.

 

“Thought we were gonna meet at the station,” Lea says once they’re face-to-face.

 

“It was no problem meeting you here,” Isa says.

 

“Hey, like the hairdo.” He reaches for the braid, examining it with another smile. “Suits you.”

 

Isa holds back a blush. “I’m thinking about cutting it.”

 

Lea’s eyes shoot open wide. “Don’t do that.”

 

“Why not?”

 

Now he shrugs his shoulders, almost like he’s trying to brush it off. “Just…the long hair works for ya.” He’s still playing with the braid. “And if it gets in your way or whatever, just pull it back.”

 

“Easy for you to say.”

 

“Hey, my hair gets in the way sometimes, too.”

 

“Your hair is unnatural.”

 

He chuckles. “Well, ya don’t gotta be an asshole about it.”

 

He smiles. “Shall we be on our way?”

 

That’s when Lea finally releases the braid. “Sure, but I gotta stop by my place first so that I can wash the scent of food off myself.”

 

“That’s fine. I don’t mind waiting.”

 

So, they make their way for Lea’s apartment. Lea takes the walk to talk about work. Vent. About customers and his boss. Isa doesn’t mind listening. What he does mind is how Lea is treated at his job. There’s not a day that goes by when a customer doesn’t complain about something that’s totally out of his control. Yet, according to his boss, it still always somehow ends up being Lea’s fault.

 

“Maybe you should quit,” Isa says once they reach Lea’s place. “If you ask me, it doesn’t sound like a very healthy environment to be working in.”

 

“What else am I gonna do, though?”

 

“There are other jobs, Lea.”

 

“But I already have this one.” He sighs. “I dunno. Maybe I’m just complaining too much. I mean, it’s better than the Organisation.”

 

Isa freezes for a moment. “Could you stop mentioning… _that_?”

 

“Huh?” He glances over his shoulder. “Mentioning what?”

 

“ _Them_.”

 

Lea cocks an eyebrow. “You mean…the Organisation? C’mon, Isa, didn’t we talk about this already? I mean, you can’t just pretend like they never existed. It’s part of our pasts, whether we want it to be or not.” He pulls his tie off and starts unbuttoning his shirt. “All right. Give me, like, ten minutes.” And he heads for his bedroom.

 

Isa sits on the couch while he waits. And it’s while he’s waiting that Lea’s phone starts to ring. He looks toward the bedroom and can still hear the water running. So, he reaches for the phone to answer it.

 

“Isa?” Roxas says. “Where’s Axel?”

 

“He’s…occupied,” Isa tells him. “Is there something I can assist you with?”

 

“Why are you always so proper with the rest of us?” He chuckles a bit. “You need to relax some.”

 

He clears his throat. “Do you want me to have Lea call you back?”

 

“No, I was just gonna ask if he wanted to hang out tonight, but if you guys already have plans then that’s fine. Uhm…” He pauses. “What are you two doing?”

 

“I’m honestly not sure. Lea’s the one who made the plans.”

 

“Yeah, he’s pretty big on surprises.”

 

“Yes, he always has been.” He then hears the water get turned off in the bathroom. “Are you sure you don’t need to speak with him?”

 

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll let you go. Later.” And he hangs up.

 

Isa sets the phone aside. When he hears the bedroom door open, he gets to his feet. But he stumbles a bit as Lea walks out with nothing except a towel wrapped around his waist. His gaze turns downward as he feels heat rise to his cheeks.

 

“Is that how you plan on going out?” Isa asks.

 

Lea chuckles as he makes his way for the fridge. “What? Don’t like what you see?”

 

He rolls his eyes at the redhead, although the teasing somehow makes it easier to look at him. That’s when he notices the scars plastered across his chest. Isa’s eyes widen. “What are—? When did—? How—?”

 

“Whoa, calm down,” he says, cracking open a can of soda. “What are you trying to go on about?”

 

“Those scars, Lea.”

 

“Oh.” He chuckles some more. “C’mon, you seriously need to ask? These are from years of fighting Heartless. What else?”

 

A wave of shame sweeps over Isa. Huh. Years of battling Heartless. Because of missions he was sent on by—He shakes his head. “I had no idea…”

 

“You’re thinking again,” Lea says. “Stop. It’s no big deal.”

 

“How can you say that?”

 

“It comes with the territory.” He holds the can up. “You want one?”

 

“I’m all set. Thank you.”

 

“Help yourself if you change your mind.” And he returns to his bedroom.

 

Once the door shuts behind the redhead, Isa collapses onto the sofa and releases a breath he didn’t realise he had been holding. He then works on steadying his breathing. When Lea comes back out, he’s fully dressed in his normal outfit. He leans over the back of the couch, grabbing his phone from where Isa had left it. He then reaches towards him and plays with the braid again.

 

“Ready to go?” he asks.

 

Isa swallows hard, nodding his head. “Yes, of course.”

 

They leave the apartment and make their way for the station. The walk this time is quiet, but it’s still comfortable. Isa enjoys Lea’s company, after all. Sometimes even more so when he isn’t talking. Hmm. Only sometimes.

 

“Where are we going?” Isa dares to ask once they arrive at the station.

 

“Sunset Terrace,” Lea tells him as he pays for both of their tickets.

 

“What’s that?”

 

He pauses. “How long have you been living here now?”

 

“At least two months.”

 

“And you’ve never been to Sunset Terrace? It’s part of Twilight Town.”

 

“No one has ever mentioned it. The sunset is always about the clock tower.”

 

He chuckles. “Fair enough. It’s a nice area, though. Nicer apartments. And there’s a little market there. I know you need to shop just as much as I do.”

 

“Is that what this outing is for?” he asks as they board the train. “Shopping?”

 

He shrugs his shoulders once they’re seated. “Well, it can be part of it. Doesn’t have to be strictly about shopping, though.”

 

They fall silent once again for the train ride. At one point, Isa catches his reflection in the window across from him. He swallows hard as he stares at the scar, and then checks his eyes. Still teal. Always teal. Whatever happened earlier had just been a fluke. An illusion. He takes a deep breath. But then Lea’s phone is suddenly in front of him, blocking his view. Blocking the reflection. Yet…he can still see himself. He sees them both as Lea leans in close to him.

 

“What is—?”

 

Lea grins. “Smile.” Isa laughs more out of confusion than anything else. There’s a clicking sound and the image on the screen freezes. Lea pulls his phone back, still grinning. “That was a good one.”

 

“What did you just—?”

 

“I took a picture.” He tilts the screen towards Isa to show him the image. Lea is grinning like an idiot and Isa’s eyes are half-closed from laughing, but there still is a certain charm to the picture. “Ya like it?”

 

Isa smiles. “I do.”

 

“Good.”

 

“But why did you—?”

 

“I was losing you again.”

 

He’s taken aback by this response. He’s not sure what comes over him, but he takes Lea’s hand in his own. “You’re not gonna lose me.”

 

Now Lea is the one who seems surprised. And Isa swears he can see a hint of red in his cheeks. “That better be a promise,” Lea says.

 

Isa nods his head once. “It is.”

 

The look in Lea’s vibrant greens is intense. Serious. It’s clear that he knows Isa isn’t joking around or teasing. The redhead squeezes his hand. Isa takes a deep breath as he holds his gaze. It’s not until the train comes to its stop that Lea breaks away, pulling his hand back. Isa restrains himself from reaching for it again but continues watching Lea as he gets to his feet.

 

Lea glances down at him and smiles. “What are you waiting for?”

 

Isa returns the smile before following the redhead off the train. Hell, he’ll follow Lea just about everywhere. Anywhere.

 

Lea gives Isa a tour of the area first and foremost. And it certainly is a nice area. Isa thinks he might prefer it to the town, even. He considers saving enough money so he can move here instead. Of course, that will take some time. And a job. Ugh.

 

Once the tour is over, they hit the local market. It’s decent-sized and, better yet, decently priced. They examine different fruits and vegetables before making their final purchases. Just enough to get them through another week or so. Isa then starts his way back to the station, but he doesn’t get far before realising Lea isn’t with him. He stops and turns back to see the redhead standing at the edge of the market but looking towards the opposite direction.

 

“Lea?” he calls to him.

 

He looks to Isa now and smiles. “There’s one last place I wanna show you.”

 

“Not sure we have much time.”

 

“It won’t take long. C’mon, you know me. I always save the best for last.”

 

Isa can’t argue with that. So, he follows Lea to their next destination. It’s on the other side of the village, atop a hill. And they’ve made it there just in time for the sunset.

 

“The view here is just as good as the one from the clock tower,” Lea says with an almost dreamy expression. “Then again, this whole world is just a great view of the sunset.” He lets out a content sigh. “Sorry, but how can you miss Radiant Gardens in a world like this one?”

 

“It was our first home,” Isa says. “I’m not sure anything will ever compare to it.”

 

“Hmm.” His head drops a little. “Y’know, Isa, if you ever wanna move back there… I’m not gonna stop you.”

 

“And leave you here alone? Tch. Who do you expect to keep you out of trouble without me around?”

 

His smile returns at this. “Not gonna argue with that. Especially if it means keeping you here in Twilight Town.”

 

Isa can’t help the blush now, but he hopes the glow from the sunset is enough to mask it. He looks towards that light and closes his eyes. For the first time in forever, he sees no flashes of yellow. He smiles to himself almost bittersweetly.

 

“Do you know why the sun sets red?” Lea then speaks up.

 

Isa opens his eyes to glance over at him. “What was that?”

 

“Do you know why the sun sets red?”

 

“I have a feeling you’re about to tell me whether I want to know or not.”

 

He chuckles. “Ya see, light is made up of lots of colours. And out of all those colours, red is the one that travels the farthest.”

 

Huh. He’s not sure it’s really that simple. “That’s quite intriguing.” For now, though, he’ll take the simplicity. He’s sick of everything being so complicated. “Let me guess… You probably want me to get that memorised, don’t you?”

 

More laughter. Such a sweet sound. “Ya got that right.”

 

He shakes his head at him. “We really should get going, Lea.” He holds his bags up. “The food can only last so long.”

 

“All right, all right, fine.” He lets out another sigh, taking one last look at the setting sun. “This can be our spot,” he goes on. “I mean, I bet you feel like you’re kinda intruding on the clock tower. So, this can be our clock tower. For you and me only.” He looks over at Isa. “What do ya say?”

 

Isa smiles at him. “I like the sound of that. Just like the wall in Radiant Gardens.”

 

“Exactly. Except a better sunset.”

 

He laughs. “Of course.” Another shake of the head. “Can we go now?”

 

“Yeah, we can go.”

 

With that, they head back to the station. They board the train just in time, too. It’s another quiet ride, but Isa is more than okay with that. Especially with Lea sitting so close to him. He went over a decade without any sort of human contact. Now he wants nothing more than to touch and be touched. Any form of physical connection. Even if it’s just a brush of the knees or a bump of the elbows. Then again, Lea gives him so much more than that. So much more than he can ever ask for. Even if he doesn’t realise it. Nonetheless, Isa still appreciates it. He’s grateful for it.

 

Once they’re back in Twilight Town, they waste no time. Isa’s place is closer, so Lea walks him home, stopping outside his door.

 

“Guess I’ll see you tomorrow,” he says, shifting the bags in his hands. “You, uh, got any plans?”

 

Isa shakes his head. “I never have plans unless they’re with you.”

 

“Man, I don’t know whether to be flattered or feel sorry for you.”

 

He chuckles at this. “I don’t need your pity.”

 

“C’mon, I didn’t mean it like that.” He pauses. “Well, I’ll be working the afternoon shift again tomorrow, so maybe tomorrow night we can do something.”

 

“I think I’m gonna go job hunting tomorrow.”

 

“Isa, I’m serious, just come work at the restaurant with me. Plus, it would make the job so much more bearable.”

 

“You don’t think we’ll get sick of each other?”

 

“Please,” he grins, “we’re already sick of each other.”

 

“Huh. For once, you couldn’t be more right.” He shakes his head with another chuckle. “On that note, I’ll see you at some point tomorrow.”

 

“Stop by the restaurant.”

 

“You won’t get in trouble again?”

 

“Nah, it’ll be fine. Especially if you stop by to ask about a job.”

 

He lets out a soft sigh. “I’ll consider it.”

 

“C’mon, you know you want to.”

 

“Goodnight, Lea.” And he opens the door.

 

He continues grinning. “G’night, Isa. See ya tomorrow.”

 

Isa watches the redhead from the doorway as he walks away. He watches him until he’s out of sight. Then he closes the door and leans against it. He closes his eyes and is relieved when he continues to only see green instead of yellow. And he remains like that until he remembers the bags in his hands. That’s when he pushes himself off the door and moves into the kitchen. He starts sorting the product into the fridge and cabinets. As soon as he’s done, he falls into one of the chairs at the table. Now he should make a meal of some sort, but he doesn’t find himself hungry. He is tired, though.

 

He heads for his room and crawls into bed, under the covers. Maybe he’ll just take a quick nap, and then make something for dinner later. A late dinner. That’ll still be better than not eating anything at all. So, he closes his eyes and falls asleep to a brilliant green colour. It always was better than the colour yellow.

 

And he awakes in a panic. The blankets have been strewn to the floor and he’s breathing heavy, having broken out in a cold sweat. He wipes his forehead as he looks towards the clock. 9:37p. He’s only been asleep for a couple hours, but now he really isn’t hungry. He lets out a heavy sigh as he slips out of bed. He stumbles into the bathroom, turning the faucet on and splashing his face with cold water. He refuses to look in the mirror. To look at himself. He just keeps his head down as he makes his way for the kitchen. Now is one of those times he truly wishes he could have one of those phones so he could call Lea. A part of him wants to apologise to him. It had only been a dream, but—Damn it, it had felt so realistic. He shakes his head as he pours himself a glass of water. It wasn’t real. That’s what he has to keep telling himself. Over and over. It didn’t actually happen. Hmm. Not in this life, at least.

 

He leaves the empty glass on the counter and heads outside. Maybe he just needs some fresh air. There’s a cool breeze and it feels nice on his skin. On his face. He closes his eyes and tries to think about green. He then takes a deep breath and starts walking. It doesn’t take long for him to end up at the station. The clock tower. He looks up at it. He’s never been up at night before, but there’s a first for everything.

 

When he reaches the top, he takes a moment to take in the view. Isa hates the dark now, but that’s one of the great things about Twilight Town. Even at night, it always feels like daybreak. Like the sun is just getting ready to rise. Although, the stars over the town are still absolutely incredible. The sight is just as spectacular as the sunset. If not more so. Isa has always admired the moon more, after all. That’s something he doesn’t think will ever change. But he’s okay with that.

 

When Lea and Isa were kids, they spent so much of their time sneaking into the castle at Radiant Gardens. Once they became apprentices, they then spent so much of their time trying to sneak _out_ of the castle. When they did sneak out, they always went to the same spot. Their spot. The wall. It lined the edge of the gardens and looked over the vast valley. They could see everything from that spot. It made them feel so small compared to the rest of the world, but it also made them feel like the only two people in the world. Especially at night. When the moon was risen, and the stars were out. They were vulnerable to each other then and there; they had no secrets.

 

Isa knows he’ll give anything to get that back. He’ll do anything to repair his friendship with Lea. Sure, things are normal enough between them now, but there’s still so much missing. So much that has changed. And he understands that things will never go back to exactly they were before, but the closer he can get, the better.

 

The closer he can get…

 

He looks towards the moon once more before deciding that it’s time to return home. He makes his way back to ground level, moving slowly. Cautiously. Once he’s outside the station, he looks up towards the top of the clock tower. He and Lea just decided on that hilltop in Sunset Terrace being their own spot, but Isa still thinks he wants to take Lea to the clock tower in the middle of the night sometime. Give him a sky full of stars to look at rather than the sunset for once.

 

When he reaches his apartment, a small part of him wants to keep going. He wants to go to Lea’s place. Be in his presence. Have his company. Make sure he truly is safe. He shakes his head. Of course he’s safe. It was just a dream. He’s safe. They both are.

 

The darkness can’t get to them anymore.


	5. Out Loud

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to give a quick thank you to everyone who has left such wonderful comments. I super appreciate them and reading them makes my days a hell of a lot better. I'm glad to hear so many of you are enjoying the story so far and I hope I continue to deliver. Writing this story was an experience for me because these characters mean so much to me, so I hope reading it is an experience for all of you, as well.

Isa had decided after all to stop by the restaurant Lea works at to inquire about a job. He figured there’d be no harm done, and he knows it pays well. Lea called the boss and Isa had an interview with him right away and ended up being hired on the spot. He’s been working there for a week now and this coming shift will be the first one he’s worked with Lea. He’s both nervous and excited for it.

 

He passes Lea’s apartment just as he’s walking out of it. He flashes a big smile at Isa as he joins his side.

 

“This is gonna be fun,” he says.

 

“Yes, I’ve never seen you interact with the other servers, so it should be interesting,” Isa says. “They all have plenty to say about you, though.”

 

“Oh, yeah? Like what?”

 

“Most of them seem to admire you, but some of them say that you’re a bit incompetent. That you shouldn’t be working at a bistro, of all places.”

 

He shrugs his shoulders at this. “They’ll always remember me, though.”

 

He rolls his eyes at the redhead. “Yes, they also all agree that your little catchphrase is excruciatingly maddening.”

 

Now he laughs. “Not gonna lie, sometimes I say it just to piss a couple of them off because I know it bothers them.”

 

“Why am I not surprised?”

 

“Well, if they have shit to say about me…”

 

Lea takes the rest of the walk to tell Isa all the little details about their coworkers. Lea is apparently the go-to guy to confide in, which Isa also doesn’t find at all surprising. He’s always been easy to talk to and open up to, after all.

 

“So, then she went to talk to him only to overhear him dissing her to the bartender.” Lea shakes his head. “Man, he’s gonna get his ass kicked by all the chicks we work with. I’m so glad I’m not him.”

 

“Wait…so he’s gone out on a date with every single one of them?” Isa asks. “What’s the appeal to that?”

 

“Not sure, to be honest. He’s gonna lose that appeal at this rate, though.”

 

Isa forces a small smile. “Maybe then you’ll be guy all the girls want to date.”

 

He only laughs at this. “Maybe, but they’ll be shit outta luck. None of them are really my type.”

 

“None of them?”

 

“Not really, no. Plus, I’m not sure I’d wanna date someone I work with. That just seems like it’d be complicated on a whole other level. I mean, I’ve seen firsthand how disastrous that can be.”

 

“Fair enough.”

 

They reach the restaurant and head inside, going straight to the back. The couple of other servers greet them before continuing with their own preparations. When they divvy out cleaning prep work, Lea and Isa take the jobs on the floor so they can stay together. Lea wipes down the tables while Isa sweeps, and then they both start working on setting the tables.

 

“This napkin fold is quite intricate,” Isa speaks up.

 

“No kidding,” Lea says. “The boss switches it up every few months, too. He says we gotta keep things fresh or whatever. I dunno.” He shakes his head. “The menu changes every few months, as well, but that makes more sense to me than changing the fold of a frigging napkin.”

 

He chuckles a bit. “Isn’t change good? Keeps you on your toes.”

 

“C’mon, we’re talking about napkins, Isa. Changing how we fold them isn’t gonna shake anyone’s day up. Hell, the customers don’t even pay attention to shit like that.”

 

“Watch your tongue, Axel,” the boss says as he comes out from the kitchen. “How many times do I have to tell you that?”

 

Lea cringes a bit. “Sorry, sir.”

 

“Yes. I don’t want you tainting our newest employee.”

 

“We’ve actually known each other since we were kids, sir,” Isa tells him. “If anything, I’ll help to keep Lea out of trouble.”

 

“Lea?”

 

“Childhood name,” Lea tells him without missing a beat and before Isa can even process what has been said.

 

“I see.” The boss shakes his head. “Either way, that’s a good thing. He needs constant supervision.”

 

Lea turns his head and rolls his eyes at this. “Would you like to double check our work, sir?”

 

“That’s what I’m here for.”

 

That’s when Lea and Isa step off to the side, allowing the boss to examine each and every table setting, straight down to the silverware. He runs a finger across some of the chairs, as well, checking for any signs of dust. Once he’s done, he stands before the two young men.

 

“The silverware on half the tables is set in the improper order,” he says.

 

“That would’ve been my wrongdoing, sir,” Isa says. “Still trying to remember.”

 

“Fix it.”

 

“Of course.” He moves to the tables he set to rearrange the silverware. The boss inquires about who swept the floors next. “That was also me, sir,” Isa goes on.

 

“They look perfect. Good job.”

 

“Thank you, sir.”

 

He looks Lea up and down. “Don’t let your friend take all the blame.” And he returns to the kitchen.

 

Lea lets out a heavy sigh before helping Isa reset the few tables left. “Man, I can’t catch a break with him.”

 

“He does seem to have it out for you.”

 

“I won’t let you take the blame, by the way,” he says. “If I do something wrong, I’m sure as hell gonna own up to it.”

 

Isa smiles. “That’s part of why your fellow servers find you so admirable. You stand up for yourself and others, no matter what.”

 

He shrugs his shoulders. “It’d be shitty not to.”

 

“Language.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

Now he laughs. “C’mon, it’s about time to open.”

 

The rest of the evening flies by. It’s a pretty busy night, even with four servers, so as soon as the doors open, Lea and Isa don’t have much time to standby and chat. Once the night is over, though, they don’t leave each other’s sides again. They tag team cleaning up any of the tables that are left covered in someone’s half-eaten meal, and then they help with carrying dishes and glasses and silverware to the washer. By the time they finally leave the restaurant, it’s close to 11:30.

 

“What did you make tonight?” Lea asks.

 

Isa sifts through the money he made. “About two hundred in tips.”

 

“Hmm.” Lea hands him some of his own money. “Here.”

 

“What’s this?”

 

“I made four hundred. If I give you fifty, that leaves us both with three hundred and fifty for the night.”

 

“As glad as I am that you can do simple math,” Lea roll his eyes and Isa stutters a bit on laughter, “you don’t have to do this,” he goes on.

 

“I want to. It only seems fair.” He forces the money into Isa’s hand. “Besides, the hostess messed up and screwed you over. A couple of those tables should’ve been yours.”

 

“Lea—”

 

“I’m not taking it back.”

 

“Fine. How about whenever we work together, then, we always split our tips?”

 

He smiles at this. “Sounds good to me.”

 

When they reach Lea’s apartment, they exchange quick goodbyes. Before Isa can get far, though, there’s a hand on his shoulder. He stops and turns to see Lea standing there.

 

“Is something wrong?” he checks.

 

“It’s late,” Lea says. “Stay at my place tonight.”

 

Isa is somewhat reluctant to accept the offer. He’s been having that awful nightmare just about every night lately. The last thing he wants is to have it while Lea is in the next room over. At the same time, though, it doesn’t make any sense to him that he would feel that way. After all, Lea is always the one he wants to talk to—to be with—once he’s awoken from the nightmare.

 

“Sure,” Isa finally says. “I suppose my place is a little farther than what I feel like walking right now.”

 

Lea smiles. “Good.” They make their way into the apartment, and Lea heads straight for the kitchen. “You hungry? Or you want something to drink?”

 

“Water is fine.”

 

“I have tea.” He pokes his head around the corner with another smile. “You always did like green tea, right?”

 

Isa is a little taken aback by this. “You actually remember that?”

 

“Of course I do. I always remember thinking to myself how I hate green tea, but I had to keep it in the house just for you.”

 

“Even when we were kids?”

 

“Why do you think I always had it?”

 

He feels a blush creeping into his cheeks. “I suppose I never thought about it.”

 

“Well, do you want some or not?”

 

“You don’t have to—”

 

“I’ll take that as a yes.” And he disappears back into the kitchen.

 

Isa shakes his head before joining him. “You have tomorrow off, yes?”

 

“Luckily, yeah.” He starts boiling water. “You?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Perfect.” He turns and leans against the counter, folding his arms across his chest. “Xion and Roxas want to go to the Islands to check in with Kairi and Naminé.”

 

“That sounds like a good idea.” He pauses. “Nothing more from Ienzo yet?”

 

“Not yet.” He sighs. “Haven’t actually heard from Riku, either. All I know is that he’s not home yet, but I couldn’t tell Roxas and Xion that. Then they would’ve started worrying about him and they would’ve wanted to go to the Islands right away.”

 

“Since you know he’s still not home, I’m assuming you hear from Kairi and Naminé quite often?”

 

“They call me at least once a day. Not always to talk about Riku. Usually they’re calling to check up on me. Especially Kairi. She has to make sure I’m taking care of myself.” He shakes his head. “I’m kinda surprised I don’t hear from her more often than I do.”

 

“She cares about you. It’s sweet. And only natural considering how much time the two of you spent together training.”

 

Now he smiles. “Yeah, well, she’s a good kid. Cares fiercely about all her friends. I think Sora and Riku just exemplify that.”

 

“You care fiercely, too.”

 

He chuckles almost fretfully, scratching the back of his head. There’s then a soft _click_ to signify the water has finished boiling, and he pours it over the tea leaves. He pours the rest of it straight into a mug before pulling a container out of a bottom cabinet.

 

“What are you making?” Isa asks.

 

“Hot cocoa,” he says. “Really craving it, all of a sudden.”

 

He shakes his head at the redhead, chuckling under his breath. “Just like when we were kids.”

 

“What can I say?” He shrugs his shoulders, grinning. “Some things never change.”

 

The rest of the night is quiet. Relaxing. Just what Isa needs. And when they get ready to go to bed, Lea offers his room to Isa. Of course, Isa politely declines, but that doesn’t stop the redhead from insisting. Isa tries telling him that the couch is perfectly fine, to which Lea then decides that he’ll just have to sleep on the floor. And that’s how they both end up sleeping on the floor.

 

Lea is the first to fall asleep. Isa watches him for a while. Watches the rise and fall of his chest. The way his arms and legs twitch every so often. The way his hair seems to have a mind of its own. He gazes at his face through the darkness. He can’t see them now, but he thinks about how green his eyes are. Even in the dark. A darkness he’s suddenly comfortable in because he knows he’s not alone. He’s with Lea. Part of him wants to reach out and touch his face, but he resists that temptation. Hell, it’s already strange enough that he’s just…watching him. He shakes his head and turns away from the redhead. He breathes deep before closing his eyes, but he still only sees green.

 

Isa wakes up first, but without any incidents. No nightmares, much to his relief. He gets to his feet and heads into the kitchen to brew a pot of coffee. When it’s just about done, Lea’s joining him at the table.

 

“Good morning,” he greets Isa, smiling. “Did you sleep well?”

 

“I did, actually,” he says. “You?”

 

“Not bad. Better than sleeping on your couch.”

 

He makes a face at the redhead before getting to his feet. He pours two cups of coffee for them, but when he turns around, he doesn’t see Lea sitting at the table. Instead, he sees a head of white hair. He drops the mugs, squeezing his eyes shut. That’s no help, though, when he only sees yellow.

 

“ _Isa_ ,” a distant voice is calling. The voice keeps saying his name. It’s getting closer. “ _Isa_.” He’s being shaken. “Come back to me, Isa.”

 

His eyes shoot open and he’s suddenly gasping for breath. He’s on his hands and knees in Lea’s kitchen, spilt coffee and broken pieces of ceramic material scattered around him. And Lea. He’s kneeling beside Isa, concern filling his vibrant green eyes. Not yellow. No white hair. Just red. Everything is fine. He just has to remember to breathe. In through the nose.

 

“Isa,” Lea says again. “What happened?”

 

“I’m sorry,” Isa says. “I didn’t mean—Your cups—”

 

“I don’t give a fuck about the coffee. Tell me what the hell just happened.”

 

He nods his head, still reminding himself to breathe. Out through the mouth. “I thought I saw—I saw—” His hands clench into fists. “I thought I saw our _Superior_.” It feels strange, somehow, to say it out loud. He didn’t want to believe this was happening, but there’s no denying it now. And admitting it to Lea makes it all the more real. “He comes and go in flashes.”

 

“Okay. We need to see Ienzo. You should tell him about this. It can’t be healthy.”

 

“I’m fine.”

 

“No, you’re not.” Isa looks over at the redhead. The look in his eyes is now a mix between anger and fear and apprehension. “It’s okay to ask for help, Isa. And Ienzo may be able to help with this. He might be able to explain why it’s happening.”

 

“We were supposed to go to the Islands today.”

 

“Roxas and Xion will understand.”

 

“They won’t care if it has to do with me.”

 

He’s taken aback by this comment. “Is that how you really feel? Do you truly believe they think of you that way? That they don’t care at all?” Now Isa only looks away from him. Lea lets out a heavy sigh. “Fine. We don’t have to go out of our way to make a visit, but next time we’re in Radiant Gardens, you’re talking to Ienzo. That’s final.” He helps Isa to his feet. “Why don’t you go take a shower?”

 

“But—”

 

“I’ll clean this up.”

 

“You shouldn’t have to.”

 

“It’s fine. Go.”

 

Isa doesn’t argue. He just makes his way for Lea’s bedroom and heads into the bathroom. He undresses himself, avoiding the mirror once again. And once he’s in the shower, he makes sure not to take too long. By the time he’s out, Lea has already finished cleaning up the mess Isa made.

 

“Like it never even happened,” Lea says.

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“Don’t worry about it.”

 

“I’ll replace the mugs.”

 

“Isa, seriously, don’t worry about it.” He looks over at him and smiles sheepishly. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

 

He nods. “I’m fine.”

 

“I still want you to talk to Ienzo. Can you at least do that for me?”

 

“It’s not that big of a deal.”

 

“Clearly it is if you thought he was real enough that it gave you a panic attack.” He places a hand on his shoulder. “I can tell you over and over that he’s not real. That he’s gone.” He shakes his head. “That doesn’t mean it’ll stop you from seeing him. But, like I said, Ienzo could very well have a solution.”

 

“Can we stop talking about this?”

 

“No, we can’t. That’s half your problem. If you would just talk to me—” There’s a knock on the front door. Lea sighs. “Lucky you.” He pushes off the counter. “We’ll drop this for now.”

 

It’s Roxas and Xion at the door. They don’t hang around for long before the four of them are heading to the train station. Isa trails along behind the three of them, spacing in and out of the conversation. And when they board the train specifically for the Islands, he sits on the opposite side of the others. For once, Lea doesn’t seem to care that he’s distancing himself. Tch. That’s not true. Isa knows that Lea cares. He knows that nothing he’ll ever do will stop Lea from caring. The last decade of their lives was proof of that.

 

Once they arrive in Destiny Islands, Roxas and Xion waste no time in getting to the beach. They run ahead, while Lea and Isa stay behind. Isa wants to say something, but Lea won’t even look at him. Probably out of hurt more than anger. Right now, Isa’s not sure which is worse.

 

“We’re so glad you’re all here,” Naminé says once they’ve all greeted each other. “It’s such a nice surprise.” She smiles warmly.

 

“Where’s Riku?” Roxas asks.

 

Kairi tilts her head. “He’s still not back yet. Axel didn’t tell you that?”

 

Roxas and Xion glance over at Lea. He scratches the back of his head. “Sorry. Guess it just sorta…slipped my mind.”

 

“That’s too bad,” Xion says. “Is he at least okay?”

 

Now Kairi nods. “As okay as he can be. I just wish he’d let us help him.”

 

That’s the end of that conversation. Roxas and Xion then start a game of volleyball. Kairi watches, calling that she gets to play the winner. Lea, Isa, and Naminé watch them from the paopu tree.

 

“So, what’s the real reason you didn’t tell Roxas and Xion that Riku still isn’t back yet?” Naminé asks.

 

Lea chuckles a bit. “Didn’t want them worrying too much about him. He already has you and Kairi for that.”

 

She smiles. “It’s sweet how you protect your friends, Axel.”

 

“C’mon, it’s nothing, really. No big deal.” He scratches the back of his head as he turns his gaze out over the ocean. “Man, sometimes even I still can’t believe just how much is out there.”

 

“I know what you mean,” Naminé says. “I hope I can one day explore a bunch of worlds, too. Riku promised me.”

 

“And I’m sure he’ll keep that promise as soon as things go back to normal.”

 

“What about you, Isa?” she goes on. “Are there any other worlds out there you’d wanna see?”

 

Isa takes a deep breath. “I’m not so sure.” He also brings his gaze towards the ocean. “I think I’m over my world-traveling days, to be honest.”

 

“I think I agree,” Lea says. “Got enough of that traveling. I’m perfectly content now with staying in Twilight Town. Visiting here and the Gardens every so often. There aren’t any other worlds I need.”

 

Isa nods his head. “I feel the same.”

 

Naminé giggles. “You two are so cute. I’m glad you were able to find your ways back to each other.”

 

Isa feels his cheeks redden at this, but before he can say anything, Lea’s throwing an arm around his shoulders. “Yeah, me too. But I told him I’d be dragging him home. And I did because I don’t break promises. Told Roxas and Xion I’d always be there to bring them back, too.”

 

“That was a little bit more of a hostile situation,” Xion says, joining in on the conversation. She then laughs. “Although, I suppose the sentiment is all the same.”

 

“Did you lose the round?” Lea asks.

 

“Yeah, it’s Roxas against Kairi now.”

 

“Oh, I gotta get in on this.” He pulls away from Isa. “I play next winner,” he calls over to Roxas and Kairi. He then heads to the bridge and jumps down from there.

 

Isa shakes his head. “Sometimes he has far too much energy.”

 

“You two balance each other out pretty well, though,” Xion says.

 

“Yes, you do.” Naminé smiles. “You complement each other.”

 

He fights back a blush. “I suppose so…” He looks over at the redhead. “Lea is a reckless idiot and never thinks before he acts, while I think everything through before making any sort of decision.” Both girls laugh at this. He can’t help but smile in return. “Was that too harsh?”

 

They only continue laughing as the three of them return to the beach to watch the match between Roxas and Kairi. This time, Roxas ends up losing. Then it’s Lea against Kairi. It’s a close match, but Kairi, once again, comes out victorious. Lea congratulates her and bows to the _Princess of Heart_. She swats at him for using the so-called title and he jokingly falls to the ground, claiming she’s too strong for him. Everyone bursts into laughter.

 

Soon enough, the others disperse between the docks and the paopu tree. Lea is still lying in the sand, though. Isa ends up joining him. They’re quiet for a while, just staring at the clear skies.

 

“Despite everything that’s happened and is still going on,” Lea soon starts, “whenever I come here, it feels as if nothing else matters. Like everything is good in the world.” He lets out a soft sigh. “If only that were true.”

 

Isa thinks for a moment. He thinks about all the time he and Lea have spent together since he reformed. He thinks about the way they act together. Especially when they’re alone, but even when they’re not. He thinks about what Naminé and Xion said to him just earlier that day. Lea is the better part of him, and he deserves to know that. He deserves to know every truth.

 

“Lea—” he speaks up.

 

That’s when his phone rings. “Hold that thought,” he says. Isa nods. Lea then sits up as he answers the call. “Ienzo. Yo. What’s up?”

 

“How soon can you and Isa return to Radiant Gardens?” Ienzo asks.

 

“We’ll have to work our schedule around a bit to get the same day off, but I’d say within the next week.”

 

“Let me know as soon as you can so that I’ll know when to send Ven to pick you up.”

 

Now Isa sits up, as well. “Are our results in?”

 

“Yes, but I would much rather discuss them in person.”

 

“No problem,” Lea says. “Isa has some stuff he needs to talk with you about, too.”

 

Ienzo seems taken aback by this. “Oh. Is everything all right?”

 

“Not really.”

 

Isa shakes his head. “He’s overreacting. Everything is fine.”

 

“It is not fine,” Lea says. He turns his focus back on the call. “But he’ll be sure talk to you about it the next time we’re in the Gardens.”

 

“Very well, then.” He clears his throat. “Let me know when you’ll be able to make it. I’ll talk with you soon.” And he hangs up.

 

Lea puts the phone away. “I’ll talk with the boss tomorrow. Make sure we can get one of the same days off next week.”

 

“What the hell?” Isa says.

 

He pauses. “What?”

 

“Why did you do that?”

 

“Do what?”

 

“Tell Ienzo that I had to talk to him.”

 

“Because I know you. And I knew nothing would get done about it if I didn’t say anything first.” He lays back down. “You’ll thank me later.”

 

“I don’t need to talk to Ienzo.”

 

“Why not? I mean, clearly you won’t talk to me no matter how many times I ask you to, so…” He shrugs. “Next best thing, right?”

 

Isa breathes deep. “I’m ready to go when the rest of you are.” He gets to his feet. “I’ll wait at the station until then.”

 

Lea doesn’t stop him. Isa doesn’t give him the chance to.

 

He’s only waiting at the station for about thirty minutes before Lea, Roxas, and Xion show up. The four of them board in silence. Isa sits on the opposite side of them yet again. Xion and Roxas do most of the talking during the ride home. Even Lea remains relatively quiet, chiming in only when he’s addressed outright. He keeps glancing over at Isa, though. Isa only notices because he keeps stealing glances at the redhead, as well.

 

Once back in Twilight Town, Roxas and Xion take the lead once more. They get ahead of Lea and Isa, but Lea does a better job at keeping up with them this time around. Until, that is, they pass Isa’s apartment. Roxas and Xion bid their farewells and carry on their way. Lea waits. But that doesn’t stop Isa from giving him a simple nod of the head before making his way to his front door.

 

Lea grabs his wrist, stopping him. “What were you gonna say earlier?”

 

“Hmm?” Isa says, playing along.

 

“Before Ienzo called me. You were gonna say something.”

 

The truth. He was going to tell him the truth. Now, though, Isa just wants to be alone. “I don’t remember.”

 

“Bullshit.”

 

“It wasn’t important.”

 

Lea’s grip tightens around his wrist ever so slightly before he lets go completely. “Fine. Whatever. I’ll see ya later.”

 

Isa watches the redhead until he disappears. Then he lets out a heavy sigh. Damn it. This is not how the day was supposed to go. This is not right. If he’s smart, he’ll go after Lea right now and tell him everything. Tell him everything he’s been going through. All the shit that’s been going on inside his head. He’ll tell him exactly what he wanted to tell him back on the beach.

 

He’s not that smart. And he’s not that courageous.


	6. The Results Are In

It’s not until four days after Ienzo’s initial phone call that Lea and Isa are able to make it to Radiant Gardens. And, of course, Roxas and Xion want to tag along. Lea tells them it’s fine if they do, but they have to stay clear of the lab until he and Isa are ready to leave. He tells them the results are private. No questions asked.

 

Ventus picks them up again outside the station. Lea thanks him a million times over for being so willing to act as a chauffeur to them, to which Ventus only laughs. He’s a good kid. They’re all good kids. Worthy of the lives they have…

 

Sometimes Isa wonders if he’s worthy of the light. Worthy of his own redemption.

 

When they arrive in Radiant Gardens, Roxas, Xion, and Ventus instantly run off together. Lea and Isa make their way for the lab, but Lea is taking his sweet time in getting there. He keeps stopping and literally smells the roses. Isa’s anxiety is through the roof. He just wants to get this whole thing over with. He wants to be told how screwed up he is and deal with it from there. It won’t even come as a surprise to him, at this point.

 

“You’re worrying too much,” Lea tells him.

 

“Or perhaps you’re not worrying enough,” Isa says.

 

He shrugs his shoulders. “Oh well. At least I’m not freaking out.”

 

He takes a deep breath. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. “Something was off about Ienzo’s tone when he said he wanted to discuss the results with us in person. He and Even have discovered something and it’s not good.”

 

“Always the pessimist.”

 

“You’re not even a little nervous?”

 

“Can’t be. If we’re both nervous, we’ll come out of the lab in shambles.” He grins. “Gotta be strong for us both.”

 

Isa swallows hard. “Always the hero.”

 

His grin only widens. “You best believe it. Oh, and get it memorised while you’re at it, too.” He winks at him.

 

Isa rolls his eyes, pushing him jokingly. Lea loses his balance, but laughs, staying on his feet. It’s when they reach the lab that Lea hesitates. Just for a short moment, though. Then he’s heading inside, Isa following close behind him. They weave their way through the maze-like halls until they reach the computer. Only Even is present.

 

“Morning,” Lea announces their presence.

 

“Ah, welcome,” Even greets them. He gestures to two chairs on the other side of the room. “Please, sit.” Lea and Isa do as they’re told. Even then steps up to them. “I just need to do a quick follow-up test on each of you.” He shines a light in their eyes. Places a cold piece of metal against their backs. Checks their pulses from their wrists and their necks. He jots a couple things down on the clipboard for each of them. “Very good. Now, let me retrieve Ienzo and he’ll take it from here.” And he walks into the next room.

 

Isa lets out a breath he didn’t realise he had been holding. “I don’t want to be here.”

 

“I know,” Lea says. “Hopefully it won’t take long.”

 

“Are you really gonna make me talk to Ienzo about—?”

 

“You need to talk to someone.”

 

Just then, the door slides open again and Ienzo makes his appearance. He smiles at them warmly. “Good morning.”

 

“Yo,” Lea says. “How’s it going?”

 

“Well enough, to say the least.” He pulls up another chair and sits across from them. “Do you want me to speak with you individually or together?”

 

“T-together,” Isa says, probably a little too quickly.

 

Lea nods. “Yeah, together is fine with me.” He chuckles—there’s a nervous undertone to it—as he places a hand on Isa’s shoulder, and Isa almost thinks it’s more so to comfort himself, but he’s perfectly fine with that. He’ll be Lea’s shoulder. To cry on. To hide in. For anything at all. He has over a decade of comforting to make up to him. “So, what all did you find out?”

 

“You two do have the same marker as Even, Dilan, Aeleus, and me,” Ienzo starts. “We used the blood samples to look into what that could possibly mean and—Well, it would seem there’s more to the darkness than just a state of mind. It’s more than just something we do or don’t allow into our hearts.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

He takes a deep breath. “Since we were thriving in the darkness for so long, it’s practically become a part of who we are. It’s physically embedded into our DNA now. That’s what the mark is. And so long as that’s the case, it means that there’s a still a chance any of us could turn back to the darkness at any given moment.”

 

Lea opens his mouth but pauses. He takes a second a think. “Xemnas and Xehanort are gone, though,” he then says.

 

“Yes, so they wouldn’t have any control over us, but that doesn’t change the fact that we could still lose sight of ourselves.”

 

He sits back in his seat, his hand falling from Isa’s shoulder. “Holy shit… A-and it doesn’t matter if we had fallen victim before or not?”

 

Ienzo shakes his head. “It really makes no difference, unfortunately. There would be no sort of warning, either.” He pauses. “On the upside, the chance of this happening to any of us is extremely slim. Even and I just believed you all deserved to be made aware of its presence.”

 

“How slim, exactly?”

 

“This is more of a precaution, if anything. Since it inhabits such a small part of our DNA and isn’t natural, there’s a chance our bodies may even find a way to fight it off. Almost as if it’s a cancerous cell.”

 

“Aren’t those two different things?” Isa finally speaks up.

 

“Yes, but in this case, nothing makes much sense.”

 

“So, really, we have nothing to worry about,” Lea then goes on.

 

“It’s more of just a fair warning, yes,” Ienzo says.

 

He smiles out of relief. “Man, oh, man, I was getting worked up there for a sec.” He turns to Isa. “You okay?”

 

Isa swallows hard. “Never better.”

 

“Oh, what was it you wanted to speak with me about?” Ienzo then asks.

 

He sighs, closing his eyes. “It’s Lea who wants me to talk to you.”

 

“There was an incident the other day,” Lea starts for him. “We were at my place and he poured a couple cups of coffee, which he suddenly dropped. Turns out, he thought he had seen Xemnas where I had been sitting at my kitchen table. And I think there’s more to it than just that.”

 

Ienzo’s eyes widen a bit. “You imagined seeing Xemnas? And it was real enough to cause a panic attack of sorts?”

 

Lea nods. “It was pretty bad.”

 

“Isa, is there more to it than that?”

 

Isa’s eyes are still closed. No. He doesn’t want to talk about this. It’s embarrassing. He’s so ashamed of himself. Why is this happening to him? Damn it. What if this means he’s more likely to turn back to the darkness? He takes a deep breath. “I don’t physically see Xemnas like that very often. But there are many cases where I see flashes of yellow when I close my eyes. And there was an incident where I thought my eyes had turned yellow again.”

 

“Isa…” There’s a slight tremble to Lea’s voice.

 

“I see.” Ienzo nods his head. “Now, I’m willing to bet you’re thinking that, because this is happening to you, you’re more likely to turn back to the darkness at some point?”

 

Isa pauses. It’s like he had read his mind. “Isn’t that exactly the case?”

 

He actually chuckles a bit. “No, of course not. You’re no more likely to convert than Lea or myself.”

 

“Then why is this happening to me?”

 

“Well, I was discussing what happened during your test with Even and we came to the conclusion that we believe you’re suffering from a condition called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.” He pauses, shifting his position ever so slightly. “It’s a treatable ailment in which someone experiences an event—an injury or something psychological—truly terrifying and they have quite a difficult time recovering from said event. And there are certain things that can trigger strong emotional or physical reactions. Your emotional reactions would more than likely be much more intense, as well, seeing as you went over a decade without being able to feel anything at all. And this can include, but isn’t limited to, panic attacks, depression, nightmares, and even realistic flashbacks or hallucinations of your life during that time period.”

 

So…he isn’t crazy. He’s not as fine as he wanted to think he was, but he isn’t crazy. Hell, Isa almost feels relieved knowing there’s a name for it.

 

“That makes sense,” Lea speaks up. “Is there anything we can do to help relieve the stress he’s feeling?”

 

“Therapy or medication are the best options. Honestly, in Isa’s case, the medication may be the easiest way to go.”

 

“Medication?”

 

“It’s like a potion.”

 

Isa shakes his head. “What if I don’t want to rely on that?”

 

“Then there’s therapy.”

 

“Yeah, except you’d have to be willing to actually talk about it,” Lea says. “So that means talking about what happened during our time with the Organisation, as well.”

 

“He’s right,” Ienzo says. “Every aspect would have to be covered.”

 

“And who the hell am I supposed to talk to about something like that.”

 

“You could talk with me or Even.” He gestures towards Lea. “Or you could even just talk with your closest friends.”

 

Lea tilts his head. “Huh. Go figure.”

 

Isa wants to roll his eyes at him, but he knows better. He knows now isn’t the time. “Do any of the others have this issue?”

 

“Well, seeing Lea gives Even a little bit of a panic attack,” Ienzo says. “But it’s not exactly PTSD.”

 

Lea covers up a fit of laughter. “Sorry. That isn’t funny.”

 

Ienzo shakes his head at him. “Is there anything else either of you would like to discuss with me?”

 

“I don’t—” There’s a crashing sound from around the corner. Lea jumps to his feet. “Why do I have a bad feeling about that?” He glances towards Ienzo. “Sorry, I’m gonna go check that out. Thanks for everything, man. Talk to you soon.” And he leaves.

 

“Post Traumatic Stress Disorder,” Isa says. “Will I always have this?”

 

“Not necessarily. It can last anywhere from a few months up to a few years,” Ienzo tells him. “Part of it depends on how well you recover and whether or not you’re able to move past the incident. If you have a hard time talking about it, though, you’ll have a harder time moving past it.”

 

He nods. “Thank you.” He looks towards where Lea disappeared to. “I best go check on him.” And he gets to his feet.

 

“One last thing,” Ienzo says. He walks over to a table on the other side of the room. When he returns to Isa, he hands him a phone. “Lea requested I get one for you. All contacts are already programmed in there.”

 

“Oh.” He pockets it. “Thanks again.”

 

“If you need anything, Isa—”

 

“Got it.” He heads for the exit. “See you, Ienzo.”

 

He works his way out of the lab. Once he’s outside, he hears voices. He gets close enough to listen, but still keeps his distance.

 

“What happened to privacy?” Lea asks.

 

“We only wanted to know what was going on,” Roxas says.

 

“Just because you wanted to know, doesn’t give you the right to eavesdrop.”

 

“Well, I’d say it’s a good thing we did. Otherwise, we’d never know that Isa is still crazy and isn’t safe to be around. He could snap at any given moment.”

 

“Did you even listen to Ienzo? The chances of that happening—”

 

“This is Isa we’re talking about,” Xion speaks up. “ _Saïx_.”

 

“Except that’s not who he is anymore,” Lea goes on. “I thought you two were doing better with him. I thought you were starting to accept him.”

 

“It’s not that easy,” Roxas says. “He’s half the reason why Xion and I had to battle for our lives. Why we had to battle each other to exist. That was part of his doing. How can you be so okay with that?”

 

“Because I’m not a saint, either. Hell, I’m half the reason the Castle Oblivion team got annihilated. You don’t see Ienzo or Aeleus talking shit about me.”

 

“That’s not the same.”

 

“How is it not the same?” He lets out a heavy sigh. “You know what? Never mind. Tch. I thought you two trusted me.”

 

“Of course we do,” Xion chimes in again. “We trust you with our lives.”

 

“Yeah? Well, I trust Isa with my life.”

 

“So, what happens when he snaps and—and goes berserk on you?” Roxas asks. “What are you gonna do then?”

 

Isa’s heard enough. He moves forward.

 

“I can’t believe you,” Lea says.

 

“We’re just trying to look out for you, Axel,” Xion goes on. “The same way you’re always looking out for us.”

 

“Yeah, we don’t wanna see you get hurt,” Roxas says.

 

“I won’t.” The confidence in Lea’s tone is encouraging. “Isa would never hurt me. If you two actually took the time to try to get to know him, you would understand that.”

 

Isa then clears his throat to announce his presence. They all jump as they turn to look at him. He doesn’t say anything. Doesn’t know what he can say. Should say. Especially after hearing all that. He suspected Roxas and Xion felt as such, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. And it does hurt. More than he would’ve expected.

 

After a long moment of silence, Lea turns on Roxas and Xion. “I expected better from you two.” And he walks away.

 

Isa doesn’t hesitate to go after him, avoiding Roxas’s and Xion’s gazes as he passes them. He remains quiet at first, not wanting to upset Lea even more. There’s a question eating away at him, though, and it’s at the tip of tongue. Before long— “Why did you do that?” The words are out.

 

Lea stops in his tracks. “Do what?”

 

“Defend me?”

 

His brow furrows like it’s the most ridiculous thing he’s heard in his life. “What the hell kind of a question is that?”

 

“You didn’t have to defend me.”

 

“I wasn’t gonna let them say that shit about you.”

 

“They weren’t wrong, though.”

 

“No.” He shakes his head. “They were wrong. _Isa_ didn’t do any of that to them. _Isa_ didn’t cause any of that suffering. _Isa_ would never stoop so low. That was all _Saïx’s_ doing.” Isa cringes at the sound of that name. “And I don’t give a fuck if you shared a body with him or…whatever, that does not make you the same person. That was a different life. You are not him.” Lea’s burning green gaze finally falls on Isa and his expression—his whole composition—softens immediately. The redhead steps up to him. “You’re not him. You do understand that, don’t you?” His hands connect with Isa’s arms, rubbing them gently. Comfortingly. “You’re not him, Isa.” His voice has softened tremendously, giving Isa the overwhelming urge to just— “You’re not him.” He repeats the phrase as his forehead now connects with Isa’s. This is the closest they’ve been in a while, and Isa doesn’t ever want to be so far away from Lea again.

 

Next thing he knows, his face in the crook of Lea’s neck and his eyes feel wet. Damn it. This was supposed to be the other way around. But Lea’s arms are wrapped around him and Isa realises he doesn’t want to be anywhere else.

 

“I don’t want to be him,” Isa manages to choke out.

 

“You’re not.”

 

“I don’t want to turn back into that monster.”

 

“You won’t.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

“Because you found your way back.” Lea pulls himself away and Isa resists only for a moment. His hands are on his shoulders now. “You made it back through the darkness.” And if you ever lose your way again,” he smiles, “I’ll sure as hell be going after you. I’ll always be there to bring you back.”

 

“How can you say that? After everything I’ve done?”

 

“Stop. You didn’t do any of that. So, don’t listen to a word they say to you about it.”

 

“They’re your friends, too. You shouldn’t be picking sides.”

 

“This isn’t about picking sides, Isa. They were in the wrong.”

 

“I’ve told you before, Lea…” He sighs. “I understand why they would have such a hard time accepting me. You see the difference between Isa and—and _him_ , but they don’t. They only knew that version of me.”

 

“Well, now they need to understand that that version of you doesn’t exist anymore. That version wasn’t the real you. This is the real you.” He takes a deep breath, seemingly trying to calm himself down. “C’mon, let’s just get home.” He pulls away from Isa and starts off in the opposite direction. “I can’t be here for another minute.”

 

The ride back to Twilight Town is quiet. Ventus tries to stir up conversations, but no one takes the bait. By the time they’re back in Twilight Town, Roxas and Xion are quick to get away from them. Lea bids farewell to Ventus, and he and Isa watch him take off. Isa starts to head home, but Lea grabs his hand. Isa glances over his shoulder to see him nodding his head towards the station.

 

“What do you say we visit our spot?” he asks with a grin.

 

“I’m tired,” Isa says. “I’d rather just go home.”

 

“Can I at least stay with you, then?”

 

“Of course, Lea.”

 

So, they make their way for Isa’s apartment. As soon as they get there, Isa starts on a pot of coffee. It’s been a long day and it’s still pretty early.

 

“I’m sorry about what happened,” Lea says.

 

“Why are you apologising?”

 

“Because I know Roxas and Xion won’t.”

 

“You can’t blame them. Like Roxas said, they’re only trying to look out for you.”

 

He shakes his head. “See? This is the Isa they’ll never know. They said all that shit about you, yet you’re still defending them. Tch. Incredible.”

 

He can’t help but chuckle. “I suppose it’s a bit ironic.” While he’s sitting at the table, he braids his hair. Lea watches him intently. “What?”

 

“Nothing.” He smiles. “You just do that so effortlessly.”

 

He holds back a blush. “I’ve done it enough times now.” He pauses. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about—About what I’ve been going through.”

 

“It’s fine. I understand why it would’ve been difficult.”

 

He shakes his head. “No, you don’t.” He then takes a deep breath. “I didn’t want to talk to you because—I didn’t tell you because—I was afraid to tell you. Afraid that you might see me differently. Or that you might think my intentions weren’t pure. And I didn’t want that. I didn’t want you to think I was still like _him_.”

 

“I don’t think that. I know who you are.” He smiles softly. “You’re Isa.” That’s when the coffee finishes brewing. He gets to his feet and pours two cups. He places one in front of Isa before sitting back down. “Nothing will ever change how I see you.”

 

He lets those words sink in. He takes a sip of the coffee as he considers them. “Why have you forgiven me so easily?” he then asks. It’s another question that’s been nagging at him since the Gardens.

 

Lea practically chokes on his sip. “Huh?”

 

“Why have you forgiven me? After all I’ve put through?”

 

“Didn’t we talk about this already?”

 

“There has to be more to it than just that.” He takes another sip. “So why did you forgive me so easily?”

 

He pauses. “Because I knew Isa was still in there. You had already given up on him, so I sure as hell wasn’t going to.”

 

“Lea…” He squeezes his eyes shut when he feels the threat of tears again, trying his best to choke them back. “You’re the reason I’m here,” he then tells him.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

He swallows hard as he opens his eyes to meet that vibrant green gaze. “You’re the only reason I made it through the darkness. You’re what I was holding onto.”

 

His eyes widen at this statement. “I…was your light…?”

 

Holding his gaze and holding back a blush is proving to be quite difficult. “Y-yes, you were.” He clears his throat. “You said yourself that you were gonna drag me home, and you were, in fact, exactly what brought me back.”

 

Now he smiles. “You’re such a sap.”

 

He chuckles at this. “Yeah, well…I blame you.”

 

He laughs as well. “Fair enough.”

 

They spend the rest of the evening talking about anything and everything. They discuss work. Isa convinces Lea to talk things out with Roxas and Xion. Then Lea casually brings up the Organisation a few times. Isa knows he’s doing this on purpose to try to help him adjust. He lets it go.

 

“I seriously might just sleep on the floor tonight,” Lea says as they’re getting ready to go to bed. “It really is more comfortable than your couch.”

 

“Just sleep in the bed with me.” The words are out before Isa realises what he’s saying. Once he has realised, he freezes. “I mean—”

 

“If you’re okay with that, then so am I,” Lea goes on, nonchalant as ever.

 

“Uhm…y-yeah. Okay. Sure.”

 

And it’s decided. They both change into nightwear and they both climb into Isa’s bed. Together. It’s big enough to fit them both, yet they’re still strangely close. Or it should be strange. Isa finds himself perfectly comfortable with the nearness, though.

 

“You better not hog all the blankets,” Lea says.

 

“You control fire. You should be able to keep yourself warm.”

 

He scoffs at him. “How inconsiderate.”

 

He rolls his eyes. “I’m regretting this already.”

 

Now he’s laughing. “Thanks, Isa. G’night.”

 

“Goodnight, Lea.”

 

As per usual, Lea falls asleep first. Rather than letting himself stare, though, Isa turns his back to him. He then proceeds to stare at the wall. It’s not as intriguing as the redhead. He considers turning back around, but Lea’s arm is suddenly draped over his waist. Isa freezes, waiting for the redhead to retreat. Instead, he only moves closer to him. He’s not sure if he should wake him or let it be. Huh. He is warm. Perhaps he’ll let it go for now. Perhaps…he’ll close his eyes…and…drift…


	7. Belonging

_Xemnas is approaching Lea, who’s been knocked to the ground. “Do you have any last words for your Superior?” he asks._

_Lea sneers at him. “You were never my Superior.” There’s something about his tone of voice. It’s almost like he thinks this whole situation is funny._

_“So be it,” Xemnas goes on. “Saïx, finish him.” And he vanishes._

_Saïx steps into the position Xemnas had just been in and looks down on Lea. The redhead returns the gaze. There’s nothing soft about it. Nothing sentimental. Just glowing yellow eyes locked with faded greens._

_“What are you waiting for?” Lea speaks up. “Do it already.”_

_It’s then that Saïx raises his claymore high over his head. He heaves it down towards the redhead and—_

 

“ _Lea_ ,” he calls out as he shoots up into a sitting position. He looks around. Feels around. He’s in bed. Not at the Keyblade Graveyard. When he looks beside him, though, the spot next to him is empty.

 

“Isa?” Lea says as he rushes out of the bathroom. He moves back towards the bed. “Are you all right? What happened?”

 

Isa shakes his head. “Bad dream…”

 

“Is it always the same one?”

 

“Yes. Always the same.”

 

Lea reaches forward to smooth out Isa’s hair, brushing it out of his face. “Tell me what happens in it.”

 

He swallows hard. “We’re at the Keyblade Graveyard. It’s the final battle. Except instead of Roxas and Xion returning and overcoming the battle—” He chokes on his next words, taking deep breaths. “Instead, Xemnas strikes you down and—and then I—” He squeezes his eyes shut, but the tears still escape. “I’m so sorry, Lea.”

 

“Hey, what’re you apologising for?” He uses his thumbs to wipe the tears away. “It was just a dream.”

 

“I know, but every time I wake up from it, I feel the need to apologise to you.”

 

He smiles sheepishly. “Maybe you should start drawing those marks under your eyes. The upside teardrops.”

 

He laughs through quiet sobs. “Lea…”

 

“C’mon, it was just a dream,” he tells him again. “Xemnas is gone. And I am more than okay.” He holds Isa’s face in his hands and searches his defeated expression. “Yup. Just as I suspected.” He smiles. “Eyes as teal as the ocean. Like the calm after a storm. Because the storm is over, Isa. And you made it home.”

 

Lea spends a little more time talking Isa down. He talks until he has him laughing. Then they get back into bed and Isa doesn’t recall the last time he fell asleep so quickly.

 

When he wakes up, Lea is already out of bed. He follows the scent of fresh coffee into the kitchen, where Lea is also cooking breakfast. Isa smiles gently at the sight of him. Shakes his head of the thought that he can get used to this sight. Then he grabs a mug from the top cabinet and pours himself a cup of coffee.

 

“Don’t break it,” Lea speaks up.

 

Isa chuckles a bit. “I won’t.” He pauses. “Thank you for last night.”

 

“That’s what I’m here for.”

 

“I’m serious, Lea. I know I’m not the best when it comes to talking out my feelings or just opening up in general, but…” He lets out a soft sigh. “It means a lot to me knowing that you’ll always be there when I’m ready.”

 

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”

 

There’s no hint of teasing in his tone. No sly smirk or cock of the eyebrow. He’s serious in that statement and Isa can’t help but blush. Damn it. What the hell is with that lately? If Isa keeps this up, soon enough, Lea’s gonna start believing he’s far too charming for his own good. He isn’t. His flattery is idiotic at most.

 

“Oh, I just want you to know,” Lea then speaks up, “that I did try reaching out to Roxas, but the punk ignored me.” He shakes his head. “I’m just gonna give it a few days before I try to sort things out with him. Roxas is the type that usually needs time to think.”

 

“I’m sure everything will work itself out in the end.”

 

“Yeah, he and Xion just need to give you an actual fighting chance.” He creates a plate of toast, eggs, and ham before setting it on the table in front of Isa. He smiles sweetly at him. “Good morning, by the way.”

 

That sip goes down particularly hard. He tries not to cough to much. “G-good morning,” he says. “Thank you.”

 

He waits to eat until Lea is sitting across from him with his own plate of food and cup of coffee. They then eat in silence, but that’s okay. More than okay. Isa doesn’t mind sitting in silence. He doesn’t feel the need to fill every second with pointless conversation.

 

“Do you work tonight?” Lea soon asks.

 

“No, I’m not working again until tomorrow night,” Isa says. “Why?”

 

He shrugs. “Just wondering.” He finishes his plate. “Do you want more?”

 

“More coffee.”

 

He chuckles. “Should’ve known.” He stacks their empty plates and grabs Isa’s coffee cup. He leaves the plates in the sink while he refills the mug and returns it to him. “Anything else, my liege?”

 

Isa cocks an eyebrow at him. “Maybe stop being such a pompous jackass.”

 

Lea laughs even harder. “C’mon, you know you love that about me.” And he winks at him teasingly.

 

He rolls his eyes. “You wish.”

 

“Fine, I see how it is.” He scoffs. “I see I’m not wanted here.” He starts leaving the kitchen. “I’ll just go where I am wanted.”

 

“Is there such a place?”

 

“Man, and you call me a jackass.” He shakes his head, but he’s still laughing.

 

Isa finishes his second cup of coffee before getting up to pour himself a third. He leans against the countertop, thinking about what all he can do for the rest of the day. Maybe he’ll go to Sunset Terrace and visit the market. He is running low on food again, after all. Or maybe he’ll wait on that so he and Lea can go together again. Visit the hilltop on their way back. Their spot.

 

When Lea comes back into the kitchen, he’s fully dressed. “I gotta get going. Have to get home in time to take a shower before work.”

 

“You could’ve taken one here.”

 

“Still need my work clothes.” He grabs his phone from the table. “Thanks for letting me spend the night. Come to the restaurant if you need me for anything.” And he takes his leave.

 

After hearing the front door close, Isa dumps what’s left of his third cup of coffee and gets ready for the day ahead. He leaves the apartment and makes his way for the station. When he gets to there, he stops, looking up. He can tell someone is definitely on the clock tower. He takes a deep breath and makes his way to the top. As he gets closer, he starts hearing voices.

 

“We can’t just ignore Axel,” Xion says. “It’s not worth it.”

 

“I know,” Roxas says. “I just don’t get why he’s siding with Saïx.”

 

“They’ve been friends since their childhood. I don’t think anything will ever be able to change that.”

 

“We’re his friends, too.”

 

“And frankly, we didn’t leave things so great with him at the end there, either. Everything was tough towards the end.”

 

He sighs. “Yeah, but this is _Saïx_ we’re talking about. He was willing to destroy one of us for the benefit of the Organisation. He was even willing to destroy Axel.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“How do you know he was willing to do all that? He was under Xemnas’s control just as much as the rest of them. Maybe he didn’t know exactly what it was he was doing. Maybe he had no control over his choices or his actions.”

 

“I think he knew exactly what he was doing.”

 

“C’mon, Roxas, you’re not being very fair.”

 

“Saïx never was.”

 

“True, but I think you keep forgetting that Isa isn’t Saïx. Claiming they’re the same person would be the equivalent of saying you and Sora are the same person.” She pauses. “Are you and Sora the same person?”

 

“No, of course not.”

 

“Exactly. The only difference is that you and Sora are able to physically exist in your own bodies.”

 

Another sigh. “I guess…”

 

That’s when Isa decides to step in. He comes around the corner and walks past them both to sit where Lea would typically reside. He takes a deep breath and waits for one of them to speak first.

 

“Spying on us now?” Roxas speaks up.

 

“I only wanted to say that I understand where you’re coming from,” Isa tells them. “I do. I understand why you have such a hard time trusting me. It makes complete sense.”

 

“We’re working on it,” Xion says. “And we’re gonna get better.”

 

“It’s fine. Just don’t hold it against Lea. If this situation were reversed, he would’ve been defending you all the same.”

 

Roxas looks down. “You did some awful things…”

 

“You’re right. I did. And I’m trying my hardest to atone for those things.” He pauses. “To be honest, sometimes I have a hard time seeing the difference between myself and—and _Saïx_ , as well.” He can’t believe he could actually say that name. Tch. He never wants to say it again now. “And I am absolutely terrified of losing control again.”

 

“You’re…afraid?”

 

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be? I lost a decade of my life to the darkness. It was all I knew for a decade. Now that I’m here…” He sighs, shaking his head. “Sometimes I wonder if I deserve to be back here. If it’s just some sort of fluke.”

 

“Don’t say that,” Xion says. “Of course you deserve your life.”

 

“I had no idea you felt that way,” Roxas goes on.

 

“Yes, well…like I said, please don’t take it out on Lea.” He pauses, looking out over the horizon. “And do keep in mind, I care about him just as much as the two of you do.” He closes his eyes. “Believe it or not, he’s kept me grounded all these years. Even when all seemed hopeless, he was still right there.” He swallows hard. “I have a lot to make up for and I understand that. I don’t expect you to trust me right away, but don’t be so quick to judge.”

 

Roxas pauses. “Did Axel tell you to come here?”

 

“No. He has no idea I’m here. All he’s said about the incident was that he tried reaching out to you this morning and also that he was going to give you some time to think things through.” He looks towards the other two. “He doesn’t like fighting with his friends. He doesn’t like secrets. Whatever it is you’re feeling, be honest with him.”

 

“Have you been honest with him?” Xion asks.

 

“As honest as I can be, yes.” He takes another deep breath. “Lea is working tonight and tomorrow, so I suggest you take that time to think about what you want to say to him. In a calm manner, of course.”

 

Roxas almost cringes a bit. “How mad is he?”

 

“I wouldn’t say he’s mad. He’s upset. He doesn’t want to have to choose between friends and he won’t. But effort has to come from both sides to make things right.”

 

Xion smiles. “I’m starting to see how you two are such good friends.”

 

Isa holds back a blush. “I apologise for intruding.” He gets to his feet. “I’ll leave you two be now.”

 

Neither of them tries to stop him, but that’s okay. He said what he needed to say. What he had wanted to say. And he believes he got his point across.

 

Once he’s back on solid ground, he looks inside the station. He decides against going to Sunset Terrace and just returns home instead. As soon as he gets there, he jumps in the shower. While he’s in the bathroom, he meets his reflection. He takes a deep breath. Teal eyes. Now, if only the scar could be removeable. He brings a hand to his face and lightly traces the marks across the bridge of his nose. The scar isn’t as prominent as it once was, but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s still there. He still has to look at it every single day. Well, he tries his damnedest not to.

 

After his shower, he spends the rest of the day relaxing. He even ends up being able to sleep through the night, which is a relief in and of itself.

 

He doesn’t see Lea again until they’re walking to work together that evening.

 

“Still haven’t heard from Roxas,” he says. “Not even Xion has reached out to me. I figured she would’ve talked some sense into him by now.” He shakes his head. “Maybe I am in the wrong here.”

 

“There are two sides to every story,” Isa says. “You and Roxas both just need to think of the story from the opposing sides.”

 

Now he rolls his eyes. “You think you’re so wise, don’t you?”

 

When they get to the restaurant, they hear the other servers chatting in a more hushed tone. They stand outside the back door before letting themselves in to get an idea of what they’re talking about.

 

“Yeah, what do you think even happened to him?” one server questions. “Like, do you think he grew up in an abusive household or something?” she goes on. “It just seems like such a weird place for a scar. And it’s almost too perfect.”

 

“Exactly.” The other server says. “That’s why it was more than likely self-inflicted. Some stupid cry for attention, y’know?” He scoffs. “He just seems like that type.”

 

Isa swallows hard and Lea storms into the backroom. “Yo, what’s up, assholes?” he greets the other two. They freeze. “What’re we talking about?”

 

Isa reluctantly follows him. He gives the other two a simple nod as he puts his belongings down. He then returns to the floor to start cleaning. It takes about ten minutes before Lea joins him.

 

“I hope you went easy on them,” Isa says.

 

“Tch. The nerve of some people. How the hell is it any of their _fucking_ business? Oh wait, it’s not.” He shakes his head. “They have no right to be gossiping about it. Especially the two of them.”

 

“Forget about it, Lea.”

 

They then clean and set up the dining area in silence. The boss, as per usual, comes out of the kitchen to double check their work. When he gives it the okay, they make their final touches and open the restaurant for the evening.

 

It’s another busy night. Lea ignores the other two servers, leaving Isa to assist them when needed. Both of them are grateful for this, but Isa ignores their words of appreciation. He knows better.

 

About halfway through the night, the hostess assigns him another new table. Just as he’s about to greet them, he notices that Roxas and Xion are the guests. So, he returns to the hostess and tells her to give that table to Lea instead and that he’ll take Lea’s next table to make up for it. Of course, Lea approaches Isa about this before even glancing over at the table.

 

“Why are you giving me your table?” he asks.

 

“If you would just look, you’d find out,” Isa says.

 

That’s when he finally takes a look at who’s sitting at the table. He smiles at the sight of them. “They’re here.”

 

Isa returns the smile. “You’re welcome.”

 

Lea walks up to the table and Isa simply observes the interaction from the hostess stand. It doesn’t take long before the three of them are laughing about something. He smiles to himself and proceeds to check on his current tables. After he’s handed over the check to two of his tables, the hostess assigns him a new one. He shoots her a quick thanks before glancing over at Lea to see him still chatting with Roxas and Xion. He smiles again as he steps up to his new table.

 

“Welcome,” he greets the guests. “My name is Isa and I will be your server tonight. Can I start off with—?”

 

“What the hell is _that_?” the man seated at the table speaks up.

 

“Excuse me, sir?”

 

“What is that on your face? It’s revolting.” His voice carries over the entire dining room. It’s suddenly way too quiet. “I refuse to look at a server who looks like _that_.”

 

Isa doesn’t know how to respond. He can’t even process what’s happening. But then Lea is standing between him and the table, one hand on the table as he invades the rude man’s personal space.

 

“You got a problem?” he says.

 

“Yes. This server has a hideous marking on his face.”

 

“And how is that going to affect his work?”

 

“It’s going to affect my meal.”

 

“The only thing that’s gonna ruin your meal is your piss poor attitude.”

 

The man’s eyes widen. “Excuse me?”

 

“Stop it,” Isa speaks up.

 

He pushes Isa away from him. “You heard me,” he goes on. “Get over yourself, and then maybe you’ll be able to enjoy your evening. But don’t you dare comment on an aspect of your server that he has no control over. Unless you’d like a mark to match.”

 

Isa’s eyes widen. “Lea—”

 

“What the hell is going on out here?” the boss then cuts in, finally having come out of the kitchen. “Axel, what do you think you’re doing?”

 

Isa pulls Lea away from the table. “It’s nothing, sir.”

 

“Your server just threatened my life,” the man says.

 

Lea rolls his eyes. “Barely.”

 

The boss turns on Lea. “What did you say?”

 

“He commented on Isa’s scar, calling it ugly and claiming it would ruin his meal. I’m sure as hell not gonna tolerate that.”

 

“He threatened to give me one that would match,” the man goes on.

 

“Is this true?” the boss asks.

 

Lea takes a deep breath and squares off his shoulders. “Yes.”

 

“You’re fired. Get out of my bistro.”

 

“Tch.” He unties his apron and pulls it off. “Fine with me.” He then tosses it at the man before storming out.

 

“Isa, take his last table,” the boss continues. “We’ll get this gentleman a new server and a free meal.”

 

“Of course.” He bows to the man. “My apologies, sir.” And he walks over to Roxas and Xion’s table.

 

“Are you okay?” Xion checks.

 

“I’m fine,” Isa says.

 

“What the hell is that guy’s issue?” Roxas asks. “How could someone say something like that?”

 

He shakes his head. “Just drop it.” He then takes a deep breath. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. “Did you put in an order with Lea yet?”

 

The rest of the night passes by quickly. And at the end of it, Isa turns in his apron. When the boss asks why, he simply tells him he refuses to deal with ignorance. He then leaves. He debates stopping at Lea’s place but decides against it. At this point, he just wants to be home. Alone. For once.

 

As soon as he walks through his front door, his fingers are in his hair, braiding it. The simple task has become somewhat of a stress reliever for him. It keeps his mind occupied, if only for a couple minutes. Then he makes his way for his bedroom and heads straight into the bathroom. He stands before the mirror, his head down. He takes a few long, deep breaths. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. Then he brings his gaze up to meet the reflection’s. He eyes stay fixed on the scar. _What is that on your face? It’s revolting. This server has a hideous marking on his face_. The man’s words ring in his ears. Echo through his mind. Why does Isa care so much about what he said? He shouldn’t. It shouldn’t matter to him. He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to forget. And when he opens them again, the eyes staring back at him are yellow. His breath catches in his throat. No. It’s not real. He squeezes his eyes shut again.

 

“A meaningless effort.”

 

The deep voice resonates within him. He forces his eyes open to see Xemnas behind him in the mirror.

 

“You cannot change the past,” his former Superior goes on. “You cannot change who you are. And that mark embodies exactly who you are. Who you will always be.”

 

Isa shakes his head, gripping the vanity. “That’s not true…”

 

“Don’t fight it. This is how it was always meant to be. You don’t belong here.”

 

He only continues to shake his head. When he looks back at the mirror, Xemnas is gone, but his eyes are still glowing yellow. The scars deeper. More ragged. _You don’t belong here_. The words repeat in his mind. Over and over. He tries to remember to breathe. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. The breath keeps getting stuck in his throat. His chest feels tight. His heart is pounding. His—

 

His heart. He can feel his heart beating. Proof that he does belong here.

 

He looks in the mirror once more. Next thing he knows, his fist is colliding with it. It only cracks, so he hits it again. A few pieces fall from the wall. He hits it again. He keeps hitting it until it’s shattered around him. Until he can’t see any sort of reflection. Until—

 

“ _Isa_ ,” another voice says. A hand grabs his wrist, stopping him. He still tries swinging it forward, but to no avail. “Isa, stop. It’s me.” He snaps his head around to see Lea. “Come back to me.” That’s what he always says. And it always brings Isa back. He lets out a huff of air before collapsing to the cold floor. Fatigued. Lea kneels before him, examining his bleeding knuckles. “Don’t move.” He gets up and walks out of the room.

 

Isa isn’t planning on going anywhere. He can’t when his entire body is numb. Instead, he just focuses on breathing again. Shaky breaths are better than no breaths at all. He closes his eyes for a moment. When he opens them again, he catches his gaze on one of the larger broken pieces of glass.

 

Teal eyes.

 

Soon enough, he and Lea are sitting at the kitchen table. Lea has Isa’s hand in his own as he cleans the cuts across his knuckles, picking out the little shards of glass leftover from the mirror.

 

“Y’know, breaking a mirror is seven years of bad luck,” he speaks up.

 

Isa knows he’s just trying to lighten the mood, but he can’t help but scoff. “I’ve had over a decade of back luck. What’s another seven years?”

 

He lets out a heavy sigh. “You gonna tell me what happened? Or am I gonna have to fight you for the truth?” Isa doesn’t respond. Just keeps his gaze on their hands. Lea shifts in his seat. “If you don’t talk to me—”

 

“You can’t help me,” Isa finishes for him. “I know. You keep saying that.”

 

“If you listened to me for once, I wouldn’t have to repeat myself.”

 

“I’m sorry. I just—I don’t want you to look at me differently.”

 

“Nothing will ever change the way I see you. That’s another thing I keep saying that you conveniently seem to be forgetting.” Once the little pieces of glass are all out, he starts cleaning up the blood. “Just tell me.”

 

“Between our former coworkers and that rude man this evening…” He shakes his head. “I suppose their words got the best of me. When I came home and looked in the mirror, I just couldn’t take it anymore.” He pauses. “I also thought I saw Xemnas again. Except this time, he spoke to me.”

 

Lea pauses. “What did he say?”

 

“That I can’t change who I am. That these scars epitomise me.” He squeezes his eyes shut. “That I shouldn’t bother fighting the darkness because I don’t belong here.”

 

“Did you say anything back to him?”

 

Isa’s eyes shoot back open as he looks up at Lea. He wasn’t expecting him to respond that way. To inquire about such a thing. “I told him…that it’s not true.”

 

“Good.” He smiles at him. “It’s not. You do belong here, Isa. And I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you here.” He starts bandaging one finger. “Plus, the fact that you told him that must mean you’re fighting to be here.”

 

“I don’t want to fall back to the darkness.”

 

“You won’t.”

 

“Then why is he still so real to me?” He swallows hard. “Xemnas.”

 

“You were his righthand man for a long time. You got all your orders from him. He did all his delegating through you.” He shrugs his shoulders. “I think it makes sense that you may feel a little lost without him. But you get to make your own choices now. You get to do everything on your own. There’s no one to control you or to tell you how to live your life or what to do with your existence. It’s all up to you now.” He moves on to the next finger. “You’re able to live for you.”

 

“I don’t think I can be on my own, Lea,” he says after a long pause. “I’m not sure I trust myself.”

 

“You’re not gonna shift back into Saïx,” he goes on. “You’re fighting way too hard for that to happen.”

 

“But what if Xemnas keeps showing up?”

 

“Then keeping telling him off.”

 

“And injure myself every time I do so?”

 

He pauses before moving onto the third finger. “We just won’t replace the mirror. Who needs them anyway?”

 

“That’s not the point.”

 

“What do you want me to do, Isa? Do you want me to move in with you?”

 

 _Yes_. That’s exactly what he wants, but he’s not sure he’s ready to admit that yet. “No, of course not.” He swallows hard. “I’m sorry.”

 

“All I’m saying is that you’ve been fine for this long.”

 

“It’s not getting any better, though. Every time I think it is—” He looks to his hand. “My eyes were yellow, too. In the reflection.”

 

“It was just part of the hallucination. They’re teal. Just like the ocean after a storm.”

 

He smiles at this. “Do you still believe the storm is over?”

 

He thinks for a moment. “I think I’ll find the eye of the storm if it isn’t.”

 

“I think you are the eye of the storm.”

 

Lea pauses again as he looks up at Isa. There’s a tint to his cheeks. Isa tries not to think anything of it. “Huh. Your light in the darkness. Your eye of the storm…” He shakes his head, chuckling. “If I knew any better, I’d think you’re trying to sweet-talk me.”

 

Now Isa’s the one blushing. “Shut up.”

 

Lea grins as he starts bandaging the fourth finger. “Almost done.”

 

“Thank you. For everything you’ve done tonight. From the restaurant until now.”

 

“Speaking of the restaurant…” He glances up at him. “What did you mean by _our_ former coworkers?”

 

He swallows hard. “I quit.”

 

His eyes widen at this. “What? Why?”

 

“I wasn’t going to put up with such ignorance. Besides, it’s not fair that you got fired for defending me.”

 

“Well, it was a little more than just that.” He chuckles. “I did threaten the prick.” He then takes a deep breath. “All set.” He doesn’t release Isa’s hand, though. He keeps holding it, tracing the bandages with his thumb. “You’re not alone, Isa. I know it may feel like that sometimes, but I’m here now. There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

 

He watches Lea as Lea watches their hands. Everything in him wants to reach for him. To touch every part of him. Then the redhead looks up at him and smiles, and it’s like all his fears have melted away. _Come back to me_. Isa will always come back to him because there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.

 

“Do you want me to stay here tonight?” Lea soon asks.

 

“Please,” Isa says. And he’s not ashamed to say it.

 

He nods. “I’ll go clean up in the bathroom.”

 

“You don’t have to—”

 

“Relax. I don’t mind.” And he walks away.

 

Isa looks down at his hand. At the bandages. “You’re too good to me,” he says, mostly to himself, his voice soft.

 

“You deserve it,” Lea says.

 

He looks up, not having realised the redhead could still hear him. Neither of them says anything else, though. Lea just walks away, and Isa watches the spot where he had been standing only a moment prior. And he doesn’t come back to the kitchen until all the glass in the bathroom has been swept up.

 

“Think it’s time for bed,” he says. “Do you mind sharing again?”

 

He only nods in response. The two of them then move to the bedroom. They crawl under the covers, facing each other.

 

“Everything is okay again between you, Roxas, and Xion?” Isa breaks the silence.

 

Lea smiles through the darkness. “Yeah. Thanks to you.”

 

“All I did was give you my table.”

 

“Not that.” He chuckles. “They told me you had talked with them.”

 

“Oh…that.”

 

“Thank you, Isa. It means a lot to me that you would do that.”

 

“Well, you’ve done so much for me.” He shrugs. “Figured it was about time I returned the favour.”

 

“You don’t owe me anything.”

 

“I owe you my life.”

 

It’ll never cease to amaze Isa just how much Lea’s eyes glow in the darkness. Or just how beautiful they are. Everything about him is—His breath catches in his throat. The way Lea is looking at him…

 

“You’re gonna be okay, Isa,” he speaks up. “You’ve made it this far.” And he turns the other way.

 

Isa wants him to turn back. He wants to move closer to him but doesn’t dare. So, he turns the other way, as well. _You’re gonna be okay. You’ve made it this far_. Lea’s right. Isa’s here because he fought to be here. Because he belongs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The idea and concept of Isa hating his reflection so much that he breaks a mirror is probably what literally brought this fic to life


	8. Genuine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In regards to the previous chapter, idk if some people might think Lea/Axel went a bit too far in the bistro scene, buuuutt......idk to me that's just how he would be when it comes to protecting the people he cares about. Plus, I know he's been recompleted a couple extra months or whatever longer than Isa, but I feel like there are certain emotions he would probably still have a hard time controlling, his temper being one of them. Y'know, extreme emotions. He's still trying to figure out the balance between what's enough and what's too far, so that scene may have been kinda too far, but to him it was worth it because fuck that guy and Isa is all that matters lmao point being, I apologise if anyone found that a bit out of character or whatever, haha  
> **end mini rant**  
> Onward, my friends and readers (to one of my personal favourite chapters) x3

There’s a shift in the dynamics of Lea and Isa’s relationship after that…incident. Hell, if Isa thought Lea’s habits of touching him were a lot before, then he couldn’t have been more wrong. Every opportunity the redhead has, he has some body part connecting with Isa. A hand on his shoulder. Playing with his hair—especially when it’s braided, which has him braiding it more often than not. Brushing their fingers together. Bumping their knees together. Anything for some sort of contact.

 

Isa isn’t complaining.

 

There’s a lot of strange touching, but no discussing it. Huh. Isa was under the impression Lea prefers to talk everything through. So…why not this? This, that seems so important. It is important. It’s important because, the more Lea touches him and the more that he gets to look into those green eyes, the more Isa forgets. He forgets about the stress. The trauma. He doesn’t think about Xemnas or the Organisation. He doesn’t hallucinate yellow eyes. He just knows he and Lea are real. And that’s all that matters to him. But there’s so much more to it than just that. If only they could talk about it.

 

It only takes about a week for the two of them to each find new jobs. This time, not at the same place, despite Lea’s protests. Lea gets a job at the local café, while Isa gets a job as a part-time editor for Twilight Town’s news report. In his opinion, it’s better suited for him. Less face-to-face interaction. Plus, he’s able to edit the papers while sitting at the café and drinking coffee during Lea’s shifts.

 

“Isn’t that boring?” Lea asks.

 

“I enjoy reading,” Isa says, keeping his eyes on the article he’s currently editing.

 

“Uhm…” He clears his throat. “Doesn’t it remind you a little bit of filing reports for the Organisation after missions?”

 

He freezes for a short moment. “I thought about that, yes, but I also figured it’d be a good way to help me get past all that.”

 

Now he smiles. “I’m proud of you, Isa.” Just then, a ringing sound fills the air. Lea pats himself down. “What the—? I don’t keep my phone on me while working.” Isa reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone. Lea’s eyes widen. “Since when the hell do you have a phone?”

 

“Ienzo gave me one,” he says. “Did I forget to mention that?”

 

“Asshole. You forgot on purpose.”

 

He chuckles before answering the call. “Good afternoon, Ienzo.”

 

“Good afternoon,” he returns the greeting. “Am I interrupting anything?”

 

“No. Is there something you need from me?”

 

“Shit, you two are so _formal_ with each other.” Lea rolls his eyes and walk away.

 

“I only wanted to see how you’ve been doing,” Ienzo goes on. “Have there been any other incidents recently?”

 

“There was one, yes.” He swallows hard. “I, uh, thought I saw Xemnas through a mirror’s reflection and ended up smashing the mirror.” He lifts his still bandaged fingers. “There may be traces of glass permanently in my bloodstream.”

 

“My…are you all right?”

 

He nods. “Lea showed up. He was able to calm me down.”

 

“Yes, that seems to be the case with him.”

 

He pauses as he takes a sip of his coffee. He’s almost afraid to pursue this subject. “What do you mean?” He takes the chance anyhow.

 

“I know I was quite young, but I vaguely remember yours and Lea’s relationship before we were all sacrificed. I remember how attached the two of you were. And now, despite everything that’s happened, you two seem as close as ever.”

 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing?”

 

“No, that’s not at all what I’m getting at. Hmm. How do I say this…?” He takes a moment to consider his word choice. “There’s a certain…intimacy between the two of you. It feels as if it may go beyond friendship.”

 

Isa feels his cheeks burn up. _Intimacy_. It’s such an intense word. “We’re only making up for lost time.”

 

He tilts his head. “Lea seems to find any sort of excuse to be near to you. Whether it’s to comfort you or find comfort for himself. And you always seem far more than willing to reciprocate the closeness.”

 

His cheeks are burning brighter. “I don’t know what you’re talking about…”

 

“I’m sorry,” Ienzo says, although he’s smiling. “I didn’t mean to cross any lines; it was a simple observation. It’s a good thing, though. Like you said, he calms you down. There’s nothing wrong with having someone that can do that for you. Someone who can ground you. Especially in your case.”

 

“The post-traumatic stress?”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“Lea wouldn’t have any sort of negative effect on me since he was present during that period of time?”

 

“If he hasn’t had a negative effect on you yet, then no, definitely not.” He pauses. “Not telling him the truth, though, could have a negative effect.”

 

He shoulders stiffen. “There’s nothing to tell. You’re reading too deep into it.”

 

Ienzo chuckles at him, shaking his head. “Right, of course. My apologies.” He then clears his throat. “Call me if your condition changes or worsens.” And he hangs up.

 

Isa drops the phone with a heavy sigh before dropping his head in his hands. It’s not long before there’s a hand on his shoulder. He lifts his head and his gaze to see Lea standing beside him.

 

“Everything okay?” he checks.

 

“Oh. Y-yeah, everything’s fine.” He shuffles his papers together. “I think I’m gonna finish up at home.” He places what he owes on the table. “I’ll see you later, Lea.”

 

He leaves before the redhead can get another word in. Instead of going home, though, he heads to the station. He hops onto the train and rides it to Sunset Terrace. From there, he makes his way to the hilltop. He sits on the single bench there, overlooking the view of the town, now so far away. He takes a deep breath before looking down at the papers on his lap. He can work under these conditions. No unwanted reflections. No voices. No stress. Just fresh air. Light.

 

By the time Isa’s finished editing the articles, he’s not sure how long he’s been there. The only indication of time he has is the setting sun.

 

“Is this your new home?” Lea announces his presence.

 

Isa glances over his shoulder at the redhead. “What do you mean?”

 

He falls into the empty space beside Isa. “You said you were gonna go home and finish your work.” He gestures around them. “This doesn’t look like your home.”

 

He looks out towards the sky. “I wouldn’t mind if it was.”

 

Lea chuckles a bit, stretching his arms so the one nearer to Isa lands behind him on the backrest of the bench. “I know what you mean.” He lets out a content sigh. “Kairi called me. She wants us all to swing by tomorrow.”

 

“Is everything all right?”

 

“Seems it.” He shrugs, taking his arm back. “I dunno. There was something off about the call. She seemed a little on edge, but I’m not sure if it was in a bad way or not.”

 

“Hmm.” He thinks for a moment. “Well, I suppose the only way to find out would be to stop by the Islands tomorrow.”

 

“Guess so. And if that’s the case,” Lea gets to his feet, “we should get to our real homes. Something tells me it’s gonna be a long day.”

 

Isa only nods in response. They head back to the station, but not without stopping by the market first. They both pick up a few necessary items before continuing to the station. It’s about a ten-minute wait until the train arrives and a quiet ride back into Twilight Town. Quiet but close. Typically, Isa would blame the crowdedness of the train for Lea’s reason as to why he sits so close to him. There’s no using that excuse now, though. There’s barely anyone on the train, yet Lea is practically right up against him. Minding his own business while absentmindedly playing with Isa’s braid. Isa tries to ignore the contact by shuffling through the articles he spent the afternoon editing. He can feel the heat from Lea’s body radiating off him, though, and it takes everything in him not to lean into that warmth. It makes him wonder…

 

“Do you truly still have control over fire?” he breaks the silence.

 

Lea tilts his head. “Honestly, I like to think I still do, but I’m not sure I’ve even tried using it,” he says. “After I woke up as me again, I got so focused on figuring out my next step, y’know? Between tracking you down and figuring out a way to bring Roxas back and all that. Then there was gaining the ability or worthiness or whatever the hell it is to wield the Keyblade and my training for _that_ started from there… Huh.” He pauses before releasing a heavy sigh. “Man, I haven’t even thought about it since you brought it up that one time.” He then glances over at Isa. “Why do you ask?”

 

Isa shrugs his shoulders. “I was only wondering. Not entirely sure what made me think of it.” That’s a lie. Why can’t he just tell him that simple truth? Ugh. “Either way, I’m sure you still have some sort of control over it.”

 

He smirks a little. “Are you telling me to test it?”

 

“That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.”

 

Now he laughs. “The more you doubt me, the more I’m gonna wanna try.”

 

“Don’t come running to me when you burn yourself.”

 

“You say that like I’ve done it before.”

 

“There’s a first for everything.”

 

He shakes his head, still chuckling. The low sound resonates within Isa and he takes a deep breath. Then when they get back to Twilight Town, they walk to Isa’s place together. Isa half expects Lea to ask him if he can spend the night, but he doesn’t. He only mentions something about stopping by Roxas’s place to inform him that they’ll all be going to the Islands tomorrow. And he’s gone.

 

Isa tries not to feel disappointed.

 

Lea’s knocking on his door early the next morning. Isa opens it, granting him, Roxas, and Xion entrance. Lea drinks a quick cup of coffee along with Isa, and then the four of them are off to the station. Roxas and Xion are excitedly chatting about what could be going on that Kairi would request them to drop by. Lea tries telling them they’re thinking too hard about it, which makes Isa believe that the redhead knows exactly what’s going on. Not that he’ll inquire; he wouldn’t want to unintentionally ruin the possible surprise.

 

When they arrive at the Islands and make their way for the beach, they run into Ventus, Aqua, Terra, and—

 

“Ienzo,” Lea greets the scientist. He brings a hand to his shoulder, grinning. “It’s good to see you out of that damn cave.”

 

Ienzo clears his throat as he shrugs Lea off him. “Yes, well, I don’t want to say Naminé forced me to come out, but she didn’t give me much of a choice in the matter.”

 

“C’mon, it’s good for you to get out,” Ventus says.

 

Aqua smiles. “Yes, we haven’t all been together like this in a while.”

 

“Must be a special occasion,” Terra says.

 

Xion nods eagerly. “Roxas and I have been brainstorming the entire train ride here. What do you guys think this could be about?”

 

Isa gently grabs at Lea’s elbow to slow his pace, allowing the two of them to fall behind a bit. “You know what’s going on, don’t you?”

 

Lea grins. “Yeah, Kairi told me.”

 

“Is it about—?”

 

“Yeah.” Isa’s eyes widen a bit, but Lea shakes his head. “It’s not that, unfortunately, but they’ll still be excited.”

 

Once they make it to the beach, Xion spots Riku first. From there, she, Roxas, and Ventus are running over to him to greet him. And when it’s Aqua’s and Ienzo’s turns to speak with him, all they do is question is health.

 

“But wait, if you’re back…then does that mean—?” Roxas starts.

 

Riku shakes his head. “I’m not here for long. I still have a lot to do.” He smiles. “I’m pretty sure I’ve finally figured out how to bring Sora home, though.”

 

Aqua’s eyes widen. “That’s fantastic news.”

 

“Yeah. I just wanted to let you all know that I’m doing fine. That things are finally looking up.”

 

It’s some of the best news any of them have heard in a while. And the rest of the day is spent in high spirits. The group splits themselves. Lea, Xion, Naminé, Kairi, Riku, Ventus, Aqua, and Terra participate in a _girls versus guys_ volleyball game while Isa and Roxas hit the obstacle course. Ienzo watches them for a few rounds before deciding he wants in. So, after Isa beats Roxas, he finds himself up against his old comrade. It takes a few rounds for Ienzo to get the hang of it, but soon enough, he’s leaving Isa in the dust. And with the volleyball match over, that’s when Lea jumps in, wanting to go up against Ienzo himself. It only takes a few more rounds before the scientist is beat. The group then soon finds themselves lounging on the beach. Until, that is, Lea and Riku decide it will be funny to grab Naminé and Kairi and practically hurl them into the ocean. The two of them don’t get far in their attempt to escape, though, before the girls are dragging them under the waves with them. Aqua’s watching Terra threateningly in case he gets the same idea, and Ventus laughs at them. He, Roxas, and Xion are then joining the others in the water.

 

“They’re all insane,” Ienzo speaks up.

 

“We’ve all been through a lot,” Terra says. “It’s good for us to be able to let loose every once in a while.”

 

Aqua nods. “We deserve it.”

 

Isa’s only half paying attention to the conversation. He’s too busy watching Lea as he’s walking out of the water. He’s now in nothing but his swim trunks and Isa’s trying his damnedest not to blush at the sight of him. But that isn’t easy when he’s walking straight for him, his gazed fixed on him.

 

“What are you doing?” Isa asks.

 

Lea grins. “Come in the water with us.”

 

He shakes his head. “I think I’ll pass.”

 

“Don’t think I can’t do to you what I did to Kairi.”

 

Isa’s face drops. “You wouldn’t.” The redhead only continues grinning as he gets even closer. “Don’t you dare.” He’s kicking sand as he tries to get away, but the 0next thing he knows, Lea’s arms are around his waist and he’s being hurled over his shoulder. “ _Lea_ ,” he calls out. “Put me down.” He hears roaring laughter from the others, but rather than feeling embarrassed, there’s a flutter of excitement in his stomach. “Put me down,” he says again.

 

“If you say so,” Lea says.

 

He gets dropped and is enveloped by—surprisingly—warm water. When Isa resurfaces, he’s gasping for air, but he’s _laughing_. Damn it, he can’t recall the last time he laughed so hard. He’s laughing and Lea’s laughing and Lea looks genuinely happy, which Isa can’t get enough of.

 

Isa splashes water at the redhead. “I can’t believe you did that.”

 

Lea’s still laughing. “I can’t believe you thought I wasn’t strong enough.”

 

“I never said—”

 

“Oh, let’s _fight_ ,” Kairi then says.

 

Lea shakes his head at her. “What are you talking about?”

 

“It’s a game where two people go on another two people’s shoulders and fight to push the other off,” Riku tells them with a playful roll of his eyes. “You and Isa are the same height, so it works perfectly.”

 

Xion jumps up, smiling widely. “I wanna play.”

 

And that’s how Xion ends up on Lea’s shoulders and Kairi ends up on Isa’s shoulders. The two girls have their hands clasped within one another’s as they try their best to knock the other off their pedestal. Lea and Isa are holding onto their fighters for dear life while trying their best not to break out into laughter again. Roxas, Naminé, Riku, and the rest of them are cheering from the sidelines, none of them rooting for anyone in particular. In the end, though, Kairi gets the upper hand, managing to throw off Xion’s balance. But it’s Isa who puts an end to the battle by getting Lea’s knees to buckle. The two of them tumble into the ocean and Kairi throws her arms into the air in victory.

 

“We make such a good team,” she says.

 

Isa laughs. “I chose the right guardian.”

 

“C’mon, no fair,” Lea says once he’s resurfaced and has helped Xion back to her feet, as well. “You cheated.”

 

“You’re just a sore loser.” He lets Kairi off his shoulders. “Admit defeat.”

 

Lea shakes his head at him, laughing. “You’re such a dork.” And he pushes him over into the water.

 

Once the excitement has died down, Ventus, Aqua, Terra, and Ienzo decide to bid their farewells and return home. Those who are left gather by the paopu tree as the sun begins to set. This time, Isa sits at the tree with them rather than by the docks. This time, he feels more like a part of the group than ever before. And it’s a pretty great feeling.

 

“Sora would be happy,” Kairi speaks up. “That we’re all still enjoying ourselves, I mean. That we’re still having fun.”

 

Riku smiles. “Of course. He wouldn’t want us moping around.”

 

She returns the smile. “Yeah…”

 

Once again, Isa’s only half paying attention to the conversation. He’s too busy watching Lea. Observing the way the light from the setting sun casts shadows upon his hair while illuminating it at the same time. The fact that his smile reaches his eyes again. And then the way his eyes are glimmering. Like an emerald in a flame. Flame. He’s still a little chilly from being in the water and he wants nothing more than to reach out and touch Lea. To be enveloped in that warmth.  If only…

 

“Hey, Lea,” Kairi then starts. “What do you say to another one-on-one volleyball match?” She grins. “Maybe I’ll even let you win.”

 

He clicks his tongue. “Oh, you’re on, _Princess_.”

 

The two of them take off. That’s when Roxas asks Xion if she wants to take a couple goes at the obstacle course. She agrees, of course, leaving only Isa, Riku, and Naminé.

 

“How have you adjusted?” Riku soon asks.

 

“Oh.” Isa clears his throat. “I’ve been doing much better, I think.”

 

“Ienzo mentioned you were having some issues with hallucinations,” Naminé says. “Are those under control?”

 

“He told you—?”

 

“He only told us because Naminé and I had similar symptoms in the past,” Riku says. “I don’t think ours were anywhere near as intense as yours, though.”

 

“You—You two went through this?”

 

Naminé nods her head. “I’ve had a few bad dreams about Castle Oblivion. Haven’t really been able to draw since I became my own person. I also haven’t decided yet if that’s good or bad.”

 

“Yeah, and I had a lot of flashbacks and shit after coming back from being under Ansem’s control,” Riku goes on. “Instances of hearing his voice and thinking it was so real that I thought he had been standing right behind me.”

 

“Yes, I—” Isa swallows hard. “I wouldn’t say they’re under control, but I do have means of working through them now.” He looks over at the redhead on the beach and he can’t help but smile. “Lea’s a big help to me, as well.”

 

Naminé smiles back. “I’m sure he is.”

 

“I have to admit, this is probably the most relaxed I’ve ever seen you,” Riku says, giving him a light punch to the shoulder. “It’s nice knowing you’re not always so uptight.”

 

“It’s hard to be with uptight with Lea around,” Isa says. “He’s so carefree and easygoing and reckless.” He shakes his head. “The amount of trouble he used to get us into…”

 

Now Riku laughs. “Oh, I can only imagine.”

 

Even when Roxas and Xion have wrapped up on the obstacle course, Lea and Kairi are still in the midst of their intense volleyball match. Everyone ends up gathering around them to watch in earnest. And this time, there are clear sides. Roxas and Xion are rooting for Lea while Riku, Naminé, and Isa are rooting for Kairi. In the end, Kairi ends up winning yet again. Lea collapses into the sand—just as he did before—as she jumps in victory. She runs over to Isa and gives him a big hug as he congratulates her. It’s an odd sensation: Being so close with someone who isn’t Lea.

 

“You’re kicking all sorts of ass today,” Riku says.

 

Isa bows to her. “The Princess has become the Master.”

 

Kairi blushes at this. “Why, thank you.”

 

After the others have retreated to the paopu tree, Isa sits beside Lea, who’s still just lying in the sand.

 

“Did I mention you’re a sore loser?” Isa speaks up.

 

“I feel so betrayed,” Lea says. “You were rooting for my rival.”

 

“She was my teammate.”

 

“Not then, she wasn’t.” He sits up. “Man, today was a much-needed day.” He nudges Isa with his elbow. “I’m proud of you.” Isa cocks an eyebrow at him. “I think today was the very first day you actually let go. You let yourself enjoy the moment.” He laughs. “Man, to be honest, I thought you were gonna be _pissed_ after I threw you in the ocean.”

 

He smiles softly. “Well, I wasn’t. I am exhausted from the exertion, though.”

 

“Understandable.” He looks towards the others. “We sure as hell have come a long way.” He then looks to Isa and smiles. “I’m glad you’re here.”

 

He swallows hard. “Me too, Lea.”

 

There’s that glimmer in Lea’s eyes again, even though the sun has long since set. And the smile tugging at the corners of his lips has Isa’s heart racing. His throat suddenly dry. He can swear the redhead is even leaning closer to him. Or maybe he’s the one leaning in. Or…they’re both leaning…

 

“Hey,” Roxas announces his presence. He tilts his head, eyeing them precariously. “You two ready to get going?”

 

“Y-yeah,” Lea says. He jumps to his feet. “Let’s go.”

 

They all exchange goodbyes before heading back to the train station. Once boarded, Lea sits beside Isa and automatically rests his head on his shoulder. At this point, Isa is almost thankful for that contact. Hell, he’ll never question Lea’s touches ever again. If anything, he’ll question why he’s not being touched.

 

The train comes to its stop, and Roxas and Xion exit. Isa tries shaking Lea awake, but the redhead refuses to budge.

 

“Do I need to carry you out?” Isa asks.

 

That causes Lea to grin. “Bridal style or over your shoulder?”

 

He rolls his eyes. “Get up.”

 

He laughs as they get to their feet and exit the train. Roxas and Xion are waiting outside the station, and they all continue to their apartments together. When they pass by Isa’s place, both he and Lea stop, bidding goodnight to Roxas and Xion before they disappear into the darkness.

 

Isa turns on the redhead. “Will you be staying here tonight?”

 

“If you don’t mind,” Lea says.

 

He responds simply by granting Lea entrance into his apartment. Neither of them wastes any time getting ready for bed, though. They’re both exhausted and want nothing more than to be in a warm and comfortable bed. One that they end up sharing. Again. Another thing that’s becoming normal between the two of them that probably wouldn’t exactly be considered normal by others.

 

Isa still isn’t complaining.

 

They’re facing each other in bed. Isa’s eyes are closed, but he can feel Lea’s gaze. Then he can feel his touch as he sweeps some of Isa’s hair behind his ear.

 

“Are you still thinking about cutting it?” Lea speaks up, keeping his voice soft.

 

Isa keeps his eyes closed. “You told me not to.”

 

“That doesn’t mean you have to listen to me.”

 

“Well, it doesn’t bother me so much anymore.”

 

He keeps playing with Isa’s hair a bit. Then his fingers are lightly tracing across the bridge of his nose. Tracing his scar. The movement is almost soothing. Isa leans into the touch, causing Lea’s hand to brush along his cheek and jawline. He shivers at the sensation and hopes Lea didn’t notice. Although, if he did, he doesn’t say anything.

 

“Isa?” he speaks up again, his voice possibly even softer than before.

 

“Yes, Lea?”

 

He pauses for a long moment. “What do you want?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“If you could have any one thing in the world, what would it be?”

 

“What are you getting at?”

 

“Just answer the question.”

 

Isa’s too tired to think straight. To come up with an answer. Instead, he brings a hand up to cover the hand that’s still resting on his cheek. He pulls Lea’s hand away, but he’s so tired he doesn’t have the strength to actually push it away. So, Lea’s fingers brush against his lips and he thinks he may have softly kissed his fingertips. If he did, Lea still doesn’t say anything. Tch. He wants to talk, but he won’t talk about what’s been eating away at Isa.

 

“I want…” Isa starts. He can’t finish. He can’t think.

 

“Isa,” Lea says once more.

 

He swears he feels Lea shift even closer to him. Feels his forehead connect with his own. The shared moment they lost at the beach. Isa smiles softly at the nearness. The intimacy. He smiles like how he’s been smiling all day. Like he’s happy. Like he’s—

 

Of all the emotions Isa has felt for the redhead over the last decade, he never imagined he would feel this one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can pry the "sharing a bed trope" out of my cold, dead hands x3


	9. Left Behind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At that point again where I'd like to give another shout out to all those who have left comments for me. I'm ecstatic to hear so many people are enjoying this story because I thoroughly enjoyed writing it lmao I hope you all continue to enjoy it, but if anyone has any qualms about a certain scene, let me know ;3  
> Either way, thank you all so much. It's super appreciated. It's also kinda hard to believe we're already halfway through. I hope everyone enjoys the second half just as much of you've enjoyed the first <3

It’s just about ten o’clock in the morning when there’s a knock on Isa’s front door. He sets his coffee mug and book down, getting to his feet to answer it, unsure of who it could be. Although, that was a foolish thing for him to be unsure of.

 

“Since when do you knock?” he asks Lea.

 

The redhead grins from the other side of the doorway. “What do you say we play hooky and visit Radiant Gardens today? No tests. No results or any of that bullshit. Just spend the day at our hold home.”

 

He can’t help the smile. “I like the sound of it.”

 

“Good because Ven’s already waiting for us at the station.”

 

“By the way, it’s not really hooky when we both have the day off and don’t need anyone’s permission to—”

 

“Shut up with the semantics.”

 

Isa chuckles before heading back inside. He gets ready in under ten minutes, and then he and Lea are off to the station. “Planning on giving Roxas and Xion a tour of the town?”

 

“Who said anything about Roxas and Xion coming along?” He shakes his head. “It’s just you and me.”

 

Isa refuses to admit how elated he is by this. He gets Lea to himself most days anyhow, but there’s just something about having him to himself while they’re in not in Twilight Town.

 

They reach the station and greet Ventus as they board his ship. Isa thanks him a million times, as he always does when Ventus ships them around from world to world. He knows the kid has no problem doing so, but it’s still appreciated.

 

“Hey, you’re hanging around today, right?” Lea asks Ventus once they arrive in Radiant Gardens.

 

Ventus nods. “Oh, yeah, I’ll be around most of the day. I like this world a lot, so I actually come here pretty often.” He waves to them. “Find me when you’re ready to leave.” And he takes off.

 

Isa looks around. “How much do you think this world has changed?”

 

Lea shrugs his shoulders before grinning. “Let’s find out.”

 

So, the two of them spend the day exploring the world. Exploring their old home. The place where they practically grew up. The place they used to know like the back of their hand. Every nook and cranny. Not much has changed, yet at the same time, everything is different. And soon enough, they come full circle, finding themselves back in the town’s centre.

 

“Hey, wait here for a second,” Lea says. “I wanna check something out real quick.”

 

Isa raises an eyebrow at him. “Why don’t I trust that?”

 

“Shut up and stay put.” And he takes off.

 

He watches the spot where the redhead disappeared before letting out a heavy sigh. He then takes a look around, letting it all soak in. Until his gaze comes across a narrow street. He and Lea definitely haven’t gone down that way yet. He glances over his shoulder. Hmm. He’s sure if he steps away for just a moment, Lea won’t even notice. Besides, he doesn’t have to listen to Lea and _stay put_. And the redhead’s curiosity has rubbed off on him. So, Isa decides to venture down the street.

 

Houses line the stone wall in a neat row. Isa walks slowly past them, his hands clasped behind his back. There’s so much life within each of the homes he passes, yet there’s still almost something haunting about them. Like he’s being mocked. And he can’t quite put his finger on it until…he comes across a house far more rundown than the others. That doesn’t make any sense, though, seeing as it’s right in the middle of all this _life_. He stops before it, his hands clasping tighter behind him. He swallows hard before stepping up to the front door. He goes to knock, but the motion only pushes the down open. So, he lets himself in.

 

Dust covers the inside of the abandoned home. Dust and cobwebs. It’s obvious the place hasn’t been lived in for years. Possibly over a decade. Huh. Still, he walks through each of the rooms. Examines the furniture and items left behind. It all seems so…familiar. He doesn’t quite understand why. Doesn’t want to understand.

 

When he comes to the staircase leading up, he stops. Despite the place being uninhibited, he still feels as if he’s intruding in someone’s home. Like he doesn’t belong. He gazes up for a moment or two longer before deciding to just go for it. He heads up the stairs, each step creaking below his feet. Each creak acting as a cry for help. He shakes his head. Tch. Why would he think like that? There’s no help needed here. No one here.

 

There’s a long hallway at the top of the stairs. He goes right first. There are three doors, two of which have been left wide open. He peaks inside. One room is simple a bathroom. The other is a bedroom. Just as dusty as the rest of the place. He turns around and heads left, where there are two more doors. One is ajar, so he gently pushes it. The door swings open, causing particles of dust to fly into the air. They shimmer in the sunlight beading through the window shades. Isa is transfixed on the room itself, though. It’s decorated—walls and ceiling—with stickers of moons and stars. Stickers he’s sure used to glow in the dark. His breath catches in his throat. As the dust settles, so do his memories.

 

There’s a hand on his shoulder.

 

“We had families,” Isa speaks up, his voice cracking. His words cut through the silence, shattering any form of nostalgia there could have been. “What do you think happened to them?”

 

Lea steps up beside him, keeping his hand on his shoulder. “I honestly couldn’t say. And I honestly can’t say I’ve thought about it.”

 

“They don’t even know what happened to us. They probably wouldn’t even think we’re still alive.”

 

“Maybe it’s better that way.”

 

“How can you say that?”

 

“C’mon, we’re not the same teenagers who disappeared on them. If they’re still out there, they’ve done their mourning. They’ve had their closure. What right would we have to take that away from them?”

 

“You don’t think they’d want to see their sons again?”

 

“I don’t think they’d see us as their sons at all. Not anymore.”

 

Isa considers this. “I’ve changed my mind.” He swallows hard. “I don’t miss this place as much as I thought I did.”

 

Lea’s grip on his shoulder tightens ever so slightly. “Let’s get out of here.” So, they make their way out of the house. Isa refuses to look back once they’re outside. Lea wraps his arm around his shoulders. “I purposely avoided coming down this way because I knew you would get all nostalgic on me.”

 

“You mean you remembered we had lived down that way?”

 

“You didn’t?”

 

“No. Otherwise, I probably would have avoided it, as well.”

 

“You should’ve just stayed put like I told you to.”

 

“Oh. Well, _Master_ , I’ll be sure to listen to you next time.”

 

“Master, huh?” He grins. “I kinda like the sound of that.”

 

Isa rolls his eyes and shoves the redhead away from him. “You’re an idiot.”

 

He laughs. “C’mon, there’s still one more place for us to go.”

 

“Haven’t we already been everywhere?”

 

“Man, you’re very forgetful today. We saved the best place for last.”

 

Isa follows Lea to the outskirts of the Gardens. With every step they take, Isa remembers more and more of where they’re going. Not that he necessarily forgot, but it did somehow slip his mind. And soon enough, they’re at the wall. Their spot. Way back when. Before everything changed.

 

Just in time for the sunset, too.

 

“Remember when we used to think this was high up?” Isa says as he glances toward the ground beneath them.

 

Lea chuckles. “Yeah, well, we both had quite the growth spurt.” He smiles triumphantly. “And I came out taller.”

 

He rolls his eyes. “By an inch. Two at the most. And your hair doesn’t count.”

 

He laughs even harder. “Yeah, yeah, whatever…”

 

They fall quiet as they continue to watch the setting sun. There’s a soft breeze. Isa closes his eyes as it ruffles his hair. He breathes deep and smiles. When he was first recompleted, he would’ve given anything to do the last decade over. To go back in time and change the outcome. Undo it all. Now, though, he doesn’t think he’d want to change anything. Despite all that happened, he still made it back. He overcame the darkness. And now he gets to be here. With Lea. It’s not exactly the same as before, but he’s starting to believe it may be even better.

 

“Maybe you’re right,” Lea speaks up. Isa opens his eyes to gaze over at him only to find he’s already looking back. “Maybe the view is better here.”

 

“Really? Huh. Because I was starting to think that maybe Twilight Town has the better view, after all.”

 

“Guess we’ll never be able to agree on that.” He looks out towards the horizon and nods his head. “Yeah, this is all I need in life. A good view and—” He glances back over at Isa. “And good company.”

 

Isa can’t help but blush at that comment. He looks down, trying his best to hold back the grin, but to no avail. So, he just laughs at himself. Damn it… Why is he still trying to deny it? “Yeah, me too,” he says. He forces himself to bring his gaze back to Lea and his shit-eating grin. “I’m gonna push you off this wall.”

 

He bursts into laughter again. “Why? What the hell did I do?”

 

He shakes his head. “You’re an asshole.”

 

“You’re just mad because you’ll never be as charming as I am.”

 

“That’s it. Off the wall.”

 

Isa takes hold of Lea’s arm, but the redhead grabs at his shoulder in return. “If I’m going down, I’m taking you with me.”

 

“That sounds like a dangerous challenge,” Ventus calls from below. They both look down at him and immediately release each other. He looks back and forth between them and the wall. “How the hell did you two even get up there?”

 

“That is a damn good question,” Lea says. “Better yet, how the hell are we supposed to get down?”

 

Isa pauses. “How _did_ we do it before? And how did we manage it without ever breaking anything?”

 

Ventus laughs. “You two are ridiculous.”

 

It takes a good couple of minutes, but Lea and Isa do find a way to sensibly get their feet back on the ground. From there, they return to the centre with Ventus. The ride back to Twilight Town is spent with the three of them talking about what they had done that day. Casual talk. And when Ventus drops Lea and Isa off, he suggests they check out his home world sometime. Then he’s off.

 

“Today was a good day,” Lea says as they make the walk from the station. “Gotta admit, it was pretty nice being back in Radiant Gardens for _normal_ reasons.” He pauses. “Should we have visited Ienzo while we were there?”

 

“I don’t think he’d be offended that we didn’t,” Isa says.

 

“Hey, are you okay?” he then asks.

 

“Hmm? What do you mean?”

 

“Y’know…the whole…house thing.”

 

“Oh.” He clears his throat. “It’s in the past. No point dwelling on it.”

 

“Yeah? That’s how you really feel?”

 

“I’m fine, Lea.”

 

“You can tell me if you’re not.”

 

“I am.” He smiles. “I promise.”

 

They continue walking in silence. When they reach Isa’s apartment, they both stop. Isa’s waiting for the inevitable question, but—

 

“All right. Before you offer your home to me,” Lea starts and Isa rolls his eyes at him, “I unfortunately have to work an early shift tomorrow. So, it’ll be easier to just stay at my own place tonight.”

 

Isa lets out an exaggerated sigh. “How will I ever make it through the night?”

 

“I know, I know, it’s a terrible loss.” He winks at him. “See ya later, Isa.”

 

“It’s late, Lea.” He swallows hard. “Call me once you get home.”

 

He smiles. “I can do that.”

 

Isa doesn’t enter his apartment until Lea has disappeared from view. He then hurries in and takes a quick shower. By the time he’s out, he hears his phone ringing. He practically runs into his room to answer the call.

 

“I’m home,” Lea says. He smirks. “Did I interrupt your shower?”

 

Isa rolls his eyes. “I had just finished up.”

 

“Well,” he yawns, “I’m wiped. Don’t work too hard tomorrow.”

 

“I’d say the same to you, but your work ethic is as lazy as it’s always been.”

 

“Hey, I resent that.”

 

He chuckles. “Goodnight, Lea.”

 

“G’night, Isa.” And he hangs up.

 

Isa sighs softly as he stares at the blank screen. Then he glances at his empty bed before dropping his phone onto it. He returns to the bathroom to finish drying off and redress himself. He then moves to the living room and grabs a book from the coffee table. He sits on the couch as he opens it to where he had previously left off. He’s unable to get very far, though, with the way his mind is racing. _This is all I need in life. A good view and good company_. Lea is both those things. Isa’s not sure he’ll ever be able to say that out loud. He can’t deny how often he catches himself staring at the redhead, though. How often he loses himself in those green eyes. How often he imagines touching his face. His hair… It’s not like Lea doesn’t touch him all the time, so he’s not sure why he’s never touched back. Why he’s never—

 

He shakes his head. Isa will only allow his imaginings to go so far. There’s a limit. A line. And he doesn’t want to cross it. He’s not sure why his thoughts even venture off to that place. Hmm. Okay. Maybe he does know why. He’ll never be able to act on it, though. It would ruin everything. Ruin his entire relationship with Lea. And that’s the last thing he wants. Lea is the best part of his life. Always has been the best part. Even when everything was in the midst of falling apart, there was something about seeing Lea—seeing _Axel_ —every single day that made the Organisation worthwhile. And when Lea found his way back to light, Isa had wanted nothing more than to be able to follow him. That was why he had gone to Lea before the final battle, after all. He needed to know his place in the redhead’s life. So, when Lea told him he would drag him home, he knew there was still a chance. He knew he had to fight. Not for the Organisation. Not for Xemnas or Xehanort or Kingdom Hearts. He had needed to fight for himself. For his existence. For his light in the darkness.

 

The fact that he won still astounds him.

 

His phone is ringing again. He puts his book down, unsure of what he’s just read, and heads into his room to answer it.

 

“Lea?” he says. “Is everything all right?”

 

The redhead is lying in his bed, rubbing his eye. “I can’t sleep.”

 

“I thought you were exhausted.”

 

“I thought so, too, but…” He sighs. “I dunno. Got a lot of my mind.”

 

He pauses. “Would you like to talk about it?”

 

“Actually, I was kinda hoping you would just…stay on the phone with me. Until I fall asleep. If you don’t mind.”

 

A smile twitches at the corners of his lips. “I don’t mind.”

 

With that, Isa decides to get into bed, as well. He props the phone up so he can still see Lea and Lea can still see him, but he doesn’t have to hold it. Then they just talk to each other about nothing in particular. About everything. They’re voices soft. There’s a lilt in Lea’s voice that gives away his exhaustion, but there’s something cute about it. Isa can’t help but blush at the thought alone. And even though they’re in separate beds—separate apartments—Isa doesn’t feel so lonely anymore.

 

He has good company and a good view.


	10. Picture Perfect Moment

_He’s surrounded by white walls. White walls with odd, grey emblems engraved into them. Every turn he makes just leads him further and further into the labyrinth. Even when he tries going back the way he came, he can’t seem to find his way out. He’s lost. Trapped._

_Until he comes to a room with a large, three-panel window instead of a normal wall. Just a wall of glass. And through it he can see the moon. Another odd shape. Heart-shaped. It’s glowing and he can’t help but feel attracted to it. Entranced by it. He steps up to the window and reaches for the moon, despite it being so far out of grasp._

_“This is who you are,” a deep voice says from behind. He doesn’t need to turn around to know who it is. “This part of you will never change. You can bury it, but you cannot kill it. This part of you will never cease to exist. It’s time you come to terms with that. Embrace it. Embrace the darkness residing within you.”_

_“No,” Isa says. “I’ve rid myself of the darkness.”_

_His old Superior chuckles. “Don’t be so foolish.”_

_He shakes his head. “I’m better than this. Better than the darkness.”_

_“Yet, you still hear the call. You still long to answer it. Because that is who you are.”_

_“No…”_

_He goes to step away from the window, but he catches his reflection. He sees the X-shaped scar across the bridge of his nose. And he sees his eyes. They’re glowing as bright as the moon. Glowing yellow—_

 

Isa awakes with a start. Gasping for air. Once he catches his breath, he swallows hard. He then reaches for his phone on the bedside table. It’s nearly four o’clock in the morning, but that isn’t going to stop him from calling. Just like he knows it won’t stop the recipient from answering.

 

“Isa? What’s wrong?” Lea greets him, his voice already laced with apprehension.

 

“I had another dream,” Isa says. He sits up, bringing his knees to his chest, hugging them. “Different from the usual one.”

 

“Well, I’d like to consider that a good thing seeing as you usually have to destroy me in these dreams.” He chuckles sheepishly. “What happened in this one?”

 

“I was just…in the Castle. Wandering around like a lost puppy until I found my way to the Grey Area. And I could see Kingdom Hearts from the window.”

 

“Doesn’t sound too bad.”

 

“Xemnas was there.”

 

“Okay. Spoke too soon.”

 

He lets out a huff of a laugh. If he can even call it that. “It was just like the hallucination. He was telling me that the darkness is part of who I am and how that will never change. That I should embrace it.” He shakes his head. “I don’t want that.”

 

“It’s fine, Isa. It was a dream. You don’t have to listen to a word he said to you.”

 

“I told him he was wrong. That I’m better than the darkness.”

 

He smiles. “See? Even your subconscious knows it’s bullshit.”

 

“Perhaps, but… When I saw my reflection in the window, my eyes were yellow again.” He sighs. “Why are they always yellow?”

 

“Same reason Xemnas always shows up. It’s a nightmare.”

 

“I don’t have them whenever I’m with you.” The words are out of his mouth before he’s even processed what he had said. He thinks he could blame it on still being half-asleep, but then he figures there’s no point. “The nightmares, I mean.”

 

Lea’s smiling again. “Yeah? Maybe that means I should spend more nights at your place. Or you could spend more nights here.”

 

Isa swallows hard. “Perhaps we could just live with each other. Eliminate the whole your place or my place aspect altogether.”

 

He pauses. “W-what?”

 

“Well, I’ve been thinking about getting a place in Sunset Terrace. It’s closer to the market and not as populated as the town itself. It is a bit more expensive over that way, though, so having a roommate would be helpful.”

 

“Hold on. You didn’t think working together was a good idea, but now you wanna us to actually live together?” He chuckles. “You feeling all right?”

 

How is he supposed to tell Lea that he’s never felt more all right? He has never in his life felt better about an unmade decision. Being able to share an intimate space with Lea has never sounded more appealing. Waking up to him every morning. Drinking coffee or tea with him every morning and evening. Coming home to him. The phone calls sufficed the distance but being in the same proximity as Lea has always been better. Has always made him feel all right.

 

“Come back to me, Isa,” Lea goes on.

 

“You’re not losing me,” he says. “Sorry. I was just thinking.”

 

“About?”

 

“Would you be willing to move with me?”

 

“Honestly…I dunno. I mean, it would put me further from the café.” He pauses. “Eh, oh well. It would still be an easy enough commute to make.”

 

“Does that mean…?”

 

“Ya got yourself a roommate who will constantly be pissing you off.”

 

Isa can’t help but laugh at this. Of course he laughs. He’s happy. “Shouldn’t be too much of a problem. I know how to subdue him.”

 

“That so?”

 

It’s too dark to tell, but Isa can hear the smirk in Lea’s tone. He can hear the quirk of his eyebrow. The teasing lilt. He blushes, thankful the redhead can’t see it. “There’s a place I’ve had my eye on for a while. We should stop by in the morning and check it out.”

 

“You’re ignoring me.”

 

He pauses, pursing his lips. “What are you talking about?”

 

“How would you subdue me?”

 

Heat flares in his cheeks. “I am going back to bed. Thank you for being willing to talk with me so late.”

 

Now he chuckles. “Okay, fine. I’ll see you in the morning. Call me if you have any other nightmares.” And he hangs up.

 

That’s part of why Isa enjoys talking with Lea so much. He had initially called him about his nightmare, and then they ended up talking about something completely different. Lea always knows how to make him feel better without even trying. He’s always able to take Isa’s mind off the heavy stuff. Lighten the burden.

 

He hopes one day he can find a way to show him just how much he appreciates that.

 

By the time Lea gets to his place the following morning, it’s almost 9:30. He doesn’t bother knocking, always letting himself in. Isa doesn’t mind it. That’s how it’ll be once they’re living together anyhow. Tch. Isa still can’t believe that’s gonna be happening.

 

“Morning, roomie,” Lea greets him with a wide grin. “How was the rest of your night after our little chat?”

 

“Better, thank you,” Isa says. “How was yours?”

 

He shrugs his shoulders. “Took me a little while to fall back asleep, but once I did, man, I slept like a log.” He grabs a cup of coffee and they’re off to the station. “Tell me a little bit about this place.”

 

“Two bedrooms. One bathroom. Decent living area. Very nice kitchen.”

 

“Only one bathroom, huh?” He thinks for a moment. “Two bathrooms seems like it’d be a bit more convenient.”

 

“Yes, but the price difference isn’t.”

 

“Got it.”

 

They board the train and sit in comfortable silence until they reach Sunset Terrace. From there, Isa takes the lead, guiding Lea to the apartment.

 

“Hey, it’s close to our spot,” Lea says with a smile.

 

“That’s a big part of its appeal, to be honest,” Isa says.

 

They let themselves into the apartment and take a quick look around. The layout makes sense. The living area is front and centre, with the bathroom nestled in between the two bedrooms and kitchen on the opposite side. One bedroom has a view of the hilltop, which Lea calls. That’s all right, though. The other bedroom has a view of the little waterfall and fountain, and Isa can live with that.

 

“I say we go for it,” Lea speaks up. “We can afford it.”

 

Isa nods. “I agree.”

 

From there, they get a hold of the landlord. Lea, being better with people, does most of the talking. He gets the application for them to fill out and all that. During this process, Isa continues to look around. He takes his phone out at one point, deciding to snap a few pictures of the place. Once he does, he looks through them.

 

That’s when he comes across it.

 

There’s an image in his gallery he didn’t even know existed until right then. An image of Lea looking at him without him realising it. And the look on Lea’s face… It causes heat to rise in Isa’s cheeks. He just doesn’t understand how this picture came to be. It was taken while they were on the Islands, but—Tch. Kairi and Naminé. Of course. Who else? Plus, he vaguely remembers seeing them with a phone, but he never thought much of it at the time. Hmm. He glances over at Lea, still speaking with the landlord. Lea looks back at him and smiles. Isa’s heart instantaneously starts pounding in his chest. And there’s that pleasant flutter in his stomach again. Like when Lea picked him up at the beach. Like something exciting and unexpected is about to happen. He looks back at the image on his phone. Lea’s eyes are piercing as ever in the photo. And they’re looking at him like that. Like he’s—

 

“All right,” Lea says to him, bringing him back to reality. “We should be all set. Just gotta wait a couple days for the approval to go through. Landlord said that there shouldn’t be any issues, though,” he grins, “so looks like we better start packing.”

 

He returns the smile. “I suppose so.”

 

They go back to Lea’s place that night. Lea invites Roxas and Xion over and they bring sea salt ice cream with them, per his request. Once they’re settled, he tells him the news about him and Isa moving to a place in Sunset Terrace. They seem sad at first, but only because they’ll be a train ride away now. But they’ll _only_ be a train ride away. At least, that’s what Lea tells him.

 

The four of them spend the rest of the evening helping Lea pack his things. They work in pairs, Lea and Roxas starting in the living room and Isa and Xion starting in the kitchen. Lea leaves a few miscellaneous items unpacked that he figures he’ll need until they’re officially moved. By nightfall, Roxas and Xion bid their farewells and head back to their own apartments. Lea and Isa take a coffee break, sitting on the floor in the kitchen.

 

“This place looks like a disaster compared to our new place,” Lea says as he looks around the nearly empty space. “Guess I never expected to be here that long anyway.”

 

“Where did you expect to go from here?”

 

“I dunno. I’m not really sure.”

 

Isa chuckles as he takes a look around at all the boxes. “We’ll need help physically moving everything. Taking the train back and forth won’t be convenient.”

 

“Shit, good point.” He then shrugs his shoulders as he lays back. “I’ll give Ven a call. I’m sure he won’t mind helping us out.”

 

The rest of the night is spent lazing around. They both end up falling asleep on the couch. When Isa wakes up in the morning, he finds himself wrapped up in Lea’s arms. It’s close and warm and he doesn’t want to wake the redhead, but he’s not sure how he’s supposed to get up without doing so. He carefully pulls his arms apart so he can slip out of them—reluctantly—and gets his feet to the floor. He gently places Lea’s arms back down by his sides. He always forgets how heavy of a sleeper he is.

 

By the time Lea wakes up, Isa’s already on his second cup of coffee. He glances over his shoulder at the redhead as he enters the kitchen. “Good morning, sunshine.”

 

Lea smiles sleepily. “Morning.” He follows Isa’s lead and pours himself a cup of coffee. “I work a weird mid-shift today, but I’ll come to your place as soon as I’m out and help you pack up. I’ll tell Roxas and Xion so they can help again, too.”

 

“Do you think they’re truly okay with you moving to Sunset Terrace?”

 

He shrugs as he sips at his coffee. “It is what it is. If anything, they’ll just have to get over it. They’re not _that_ attached to me, though.”

 

When Lea leaves for work, Isa heads back to his own apartment. Upon his arrival home, he looks around. Packing up his belongings should be simple enough. It’s not like he has very many possessions. He’s not one for knickknacks. Emotional attachment to objects. It seems pointless. But perhaps that’s because he’s still adjusting. After all, he went over a decade without having any personal belongings. Just a rearrangement of his name and a block coat. Other than that, he had nothing. But even with such few belongings now, he still feels like he has everything.

 

He spends the afternoon reading through and editing new articles and posts. Around six o’clock there’s a knock at his door. He answers it to find Roxas and Xion standing on the other side, more ice cream in hand. He grants them entrance and sets his readings aside for the evening. It then doesn’t take much longer before the front door is opening again as Lea lets himself in.

 

“I don’t have nearly as much to pack as Lea did,” Isa tells them. “So, it shouldn’t take us very long.”

 

“That’s okay.” Xion smiles. “That’ll give us more time to just hang out.”

 

“I need that after today.” Lea falls onto the couch with a heavy sigh. “Man, this thing is actually comfortable to me right now.”

 

Isa raises an eyebrow at him. “That bad of a day?”

 

“I don’t know what was in the water, but everyone was just pissed off. Nobody could be pleased.” Another sigh. “Man, I’m in the wrong business.”

 

“Believe it or not, Axel, but you’re really good with people,” Roxas says. “So, I think the service industry suits you. I mean, you have the patience for it.”

 

“Unless someone makes a rude comment about a close friend.” Xion shakes her head. “I still can’t get over that incident at the bistro.”

 

“It’s in the past,” Isa speaks up. “It doesn’t matter anymore.” That’s what he keeps telling himself, at least. What he has to tell himself.

 

From there, they all start packing, splitting up again. Except this time, Isa keeps Lea with him in the kitchen while sending Roxas and Xion to the living room. Then Isa is more than uncomfortable when they get to his bedroom seeing as he doesn’t necessarily want so many people in there. Thinking about the fact that it won’t be his own bedroom for much longer, though, helps him get through it.

 

“Whoa, what happened to the mirror?” Roxas suddenly asks.

 

“Shit,” Lea says. “Yeah, we should probably get that fixed.”

 

“Why? What happened to it?”

 

Isa swallows hard, brushing his fingers over the knuckles of his right hand. “Nothing.” No more bandages, but there are small scars. “It cracked.”

 

That’s the end of it. As soon as they finish up in the bedroom, Roxas and Xion take their leave. And once they’re gone, Lea’s in the kitchen brewing a pot of coffee. Isa’s sitting on the couch with his face buried in his hands. He only moves when Lea nudges him with a cup of coffee.

 

“You okay?” the redhead checks.

 

Isa takes the cup. “Honestly?” He sighs. “Two nights in a row with those two is mentally exhausting. Tch. How do they always have so much energy?”

 

He chuckles a bit. “Yeah, it’s something you have to get used to.” He takes a sip from his own cup. “Hopefully we’ll hear from the landlord tomorrow and get the go ahead.”

 

He nods as he looks around. “Tch. This place looks no emptier now than it did a couple hours ago.”

 

“Nothing wrong with that.” He sits beside him. “Shit. This couch is staying here. No way in hell it’s coming with us.”

 

“I can live without it.”

 

But that doesn’t stop them from falling asleep on it. Although, Isa wakes up in the middle of night to find them in the same positions. He carefully pries the empty coffee mug from Lea’s grasp and returns it to the kitchen. He then returns to the sofa and tilts his head at the sleeping redhead. The last thing he wants to do is wake him up, so he carefully scoops him into his arms and carries him into the bedroom. He lays him down before crawling into the bed beside him, covering them both. Isa remains sitting up, watching him for a moment, brushing a few loose strands of red hair out of his face. Soon enough, they’ll be sleeping only a room apart from each other. Yet, somehow, Isa still wants more. He wants to be greedy, but he’s not sure he deserves it. Hmm. It’s not important right now. So, he brushes his fingers through Lea’s hair once more before laying down and drifting off.

 

When he awakes next, he’s alone in the bed. He stares at the empty side, passing his hand along the sheets. They’re still warm, which means Lea hasn’t been up for long. He stares for another moment before forcing himself out of the bed. He takes a deep breath, running his fingers through his hair as he gets to his feet. And as he makes his way for the kitchen, he braids it. When he enters, Lea is just starting to brew a pot of coffee.

 

“Morning,” Isa announces his presence.

 

Lea turns to face him and grins. “There should be a _good_ in there somewhere.”

 

“You’re chipper for first thing in the morning.”

 

“I just finished speaking with the landlord,” he says. Isa turns on his heel to face the still grinning redhead. This has to be a good sign. “We got the place.”

 

His eyes widen. “We got it?”

 

“We got it.”

 

Isa feels frozen in place. Except he’s not frozen because he’s advancing towards Lea. He throws his arms around his neck in a hug and even Lea seems surprised. It’s rare for Isa to be the one to initiate contact. But that doesn’t prevent the redhead from returning the gesture. He wraps his arms around Isa’s waist, hugging back. Next thing Isa knows, his cheeks are wet. His breath catches in his throat. He’s crying. Why is he crying?

 

Lea pulls away and takes the other’s face in his hands without reluctance. “Hey, c’mon.” He laughs lightly. “What’s gotten into you?”

 

“I don’t—I don’t know.” He pulls Lea’s hands away from his face to dry his eyes on his own. “I don’t know what’s come over me. I’m so sorry.”

 

“Nothing to apologise for.”

 

Isa covers his face with his hands as he takes a few deep, calming breath. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. He then pushes his hands to his hair, brushing it back. He thought he had control over his emotions, but he’s just been proven wrong.

 

“When can we move in?” he finally asks.

 

Lea smiles again. “Tomorrow.”

 

Lea spends most of the morning making calls between Ventus, Aqua, and Terra until they come up with a plan that involves all three of them helping with the move, along with Roxas and Xion. After all, it’s like Isa pointed out, they won’t be able to use the train. Going back and forth multiple times would be more than an inconvenience, plus they wouldn’t be able to lug all those boxes at the same time.

 

Once he’s done making calls, he gets ready for work. And he’s talking about the job and his coworkers and some usual customers, but for once, Isa isn’t listening. He’s too busy just watching the redhead. Observing. Studying his body language. The way he moves his hands when he speaks. The expressions he makes. The quirk of his eyebrow and the way the left corner of his lips twitch when he tries not to laugh. It’s enticing. And while he’s sitting there, drinking coffee and watching him, Isa can’t help but wonder if the look on his face matches the one from the image on his phone of Lea watching him.

 

“Either way…” Lea shakes his head. “What are you plans for the rest of the day?”

 

Isa jolts at being spoken to directly. “Oh.” He clears his throat, standing to pour himself a third cup of coffee. “I think I’ll just—”

 

“Whoa, take it easy,” he says. “You’re gonna wanna be able to sleep tonight.”

 

“I’ll be fine.” He sits back down. “I have a few more articles to edit. I’ll just work on those today.”

 

He smiles. “If that’s the case, then stop by the café and work on them there. You haven’t done that in a while.”

 

“Because you enjoy distracting me.”

 

“Not my fault you’re so easily distracted by me.”

 

He holds back a blush. “Don’t flatter yourself.”

 

With that, Lea takes his leave. Isa then sits in silence as he finishes his third cup of coffee. Once he’s done with it, he places his mug in the sink. He looks at for a long moment and smiles. From there, he gets ready for the day ahead of him. The articles can wait; he has plenty of time. After all, the deadline is another week and a half away. Besides, he has a new plan for the day. Something else in mind. Something better.

 

By the time he gets back to his place, Lea is already back from his shift. He comes out of the kitchen with a to-go box.

 

“I was just about to you call you,” he says with a mouth full of food.

 

Isa places the small bag in his hand down by the front door. “Sorry. I had a couple errands to run.”

 

He gestures at the bag with his head. “What ya got there?”

 

He can’t help the smile. “It’s a surprise. You’ll get it once we’re officially moved into our new place.”

 

“You’re an ass. You got me a gift?”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

He shakes his head, chuckling. “C’mon, there’s plenty of food.”

 

They sit in the middle of the kitchen, eating and talking, for at least two and a half hours. Maybe even longer. Once they’ve both had their fill, they’re lying on the floor in opposite directions with their heads side-by-side, staring at the ceiling. Isa’s having a difficult time controlling his laughter as Lea points out different cracks in the ceiling and creates stupid names for them as if they’re constellations.

 

“You wanna see real stars?” Isa soon asks.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“The clock tower.” He sits up and looks over his shoulder at him. “The view at night is just as great as the view during the sunset. If not better.”

 

The redhead looks back at him upside down. “How would you know that?”

 

“I went one night on my own.”

 

Now he sits up as well, smiling. “Let’s go.”

 

So, they make their way for the clock tower. The moon isn’t full, but they’re still able to find their way through the town. Partly because it’s a small town. Mostly out of memory. And when they reach the station, they don’t hesitate to climb to the top of the tower. Once they’re at the top, Isa stops to take in the view. He breathes deep. For him, the night sky will always beat out the sunset.

 

“You were right,” Lea speaks up. “This is just as good as the sunset.” He sits in his normal spot. “Man, look at how many stars there are…”

 

Isa sits beside him. “There are as many stars as there are worlds, no?”

 

“I dunno. I guess the stars used to blink out when a world would fall to darkness, so that could be.”

 

“Hmm.” He thinks for a moment. Then he smiles. “Do you have any made-up names for these constellations?”

 

He laughs. “You know it.”

 

And Lea starts forming his own constellations and making up names for them. Except now there are stories to go along with them. Isa’s laughing again. He’s laughing so much, his cheeks and sides hurt, but it’s the most incredible feeling in the world. In all worlds. In his existence. He’s laughing so much that he doesn’t even notice the fact that he and Lea are slowly sliding closer and closer to one another. Even once they’re shoulders have collided, though, neither of them moves away. Neither of them notices.

 

Until, that is, they look at each other.

 

Their faces are barely an inch apart. Hell, they’re so close their noses brushed against one another’s when they turned to look at each other. Isa’s breath catches in his throat. There’s a look of shock in Lea’s eyes before his expression softens and he chuckles. Then he closes his eyes as he connects his forehead with Isa’s. Isa keeps his eyes open, trying to remind himself to breath. Trying to remember how to breathe. Damn it. Out through the mouth. In through the nose. They’re so close. If he were to lean just a little bit closer—

 

A phone starts to ring. Lea pulls away and looks at his pocket. He then looks back at Isa, as if he’s asking for permission. Isa swallows hard as he nods his head. Lea looks almost disappointed as he pulls his phone out to answer it.

 

“Roxas,” he says. “What’s up?”

 

“We’ve been to your place and Isa’s,” he says. “Where are you two?”

 

He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Depends. Where are you guys?”

 

“We’re at Isa’s now.”

 

“Stay there. We’ll be back soon.” And he hangs up with a heavy sigh. “Well, this was nice while it lasted.” He glances over at Isa again. “Ready?”

 

Isa wants to say no. _Hell no_. Instead, he only nods in response. They then make their way back to ground level. From there, it’s a quiet walk to Isa’s apartment. Roxas and Xion are waiting outside when they get there. Isa lets them all in and they instantly fall onto the couch talking about how they figured it’d be easier if they spent the night, so that way they’ll all already be together in the morning. Isa’s only half listening, beelining for the kitchen to clean up the mess he and Lea had left behind. Before he disappears into the room, though, he glances over his shoulder at the redhead to find him already looking back. He smiles in a way reminiscent to the image on his phone. Isa returns the smile, blushing lightly. He then starts cleaning up.

 

“We should get to bed,” he says once he’s done.

 

Xion smiles. “But we’re not tired.”

 

“Too bad. Tomorrow’s gonna be a long day. We’ll wanna be well-rested.”

 

“Isa’s right,” Lea says. “Bedtime.”

 

Roxas looks back and forth between the two of them. “You two act like parents sometimes and it’s kinda weird.”

 

Now Xion giggles. “That’s so true. Axel is the more laidback parent and Isa is the stricter parent. And I don’t mean that in a bad way.”

 

Lea laughs as well. “If that’s how you see us…”

 

Isa only shakes his head at them. “Bed.”

 

Roxas and Xion follow orders and get ready for bed. Isa and Lea then fall onto the couch together.

 

“Guess we’re parents now,” Lea speaks up.

 

Isa rolls his eyes. “Shut up about that.”

 

He laughs again. And when Roxas and Xion return, they evacuate the couch. Xion takes it over while Roxas creates a spot for himself on the floor in front of the sofa. Lea and Isa then retire to the bedroom for the night. It’s only a mattress on the floor now, but it’s better than nothing. Better than the sofa.

 

“Man, I can’t believe we’re moving tomorrow,” Lea says. “This is gonna be an event.”

 

Isa scoffs. “No kidding.”

 

“You’re not having second thoughts, are you?”

 

“What?” He shakes his head. “No. Of course not.”

 

“Okay, just checking.” They crawl beneath the blankets together. “Hell, we should’ve just gone with a single bedroom.” He grins. “We’re always sharing a bed anyway.”

 

He rolls his eyes to cover another blush. “Goodnight, Lea.”

 

He chuckles. “Night, Isa.”

 

They fall asleep facing each other. Their foreheads are just barely touching again. Hmm. Next chance Isa has, he’s not holding back. By now, he knows what he wants. He used to not let himself read too deep into it, but as far as he’s concerned, he’s sure Lea wants the same thing.

 

He’s never been good at taking chances, but this one will be worth it.


	11. Moving Day

Isa is the first to wake up. He slowly slips off the mattress and moves into the living area. Xion and Roxas are definitely still fast asleep. He continues towards the kitchen and starts with a pot of coffee. Once it’s brewing, he pulls out the few pots and pans they had left unpacked and starts cooking breakfast. He figures he’ll keep it simple this morning. Eggs and toast. At least they’ll have something, though, before they start lugging boxes back and forth.

 

“Morning,” Roxas soon greets him.

 

“Morning,” Isa says. “Coffee’s almost done. Or I can make tea, if you prefer.”

 

“That depends. Do you have cream and sugar?”

 

“You do know how often Lea is here, right?”

 

He chuckles. “Good point.” He moves to the fridge and pulls out the creamer. “Are you excited to be moving?”

 

“Yes, I am. It feels like another fresh start.”

 

“No offence, but you can only have so many of those.”

 

The statement stings a bit. Isa tries not to let it bother him. “I know.” Bread pops out of the toaster. “You can have the first serving.”

 

Roxas grabs a plate and the two pieces of toast, replacing them with two more pieces of bread. Isa then slides the eggs onto his plate. Roxas leans against the counter and watches as Isa starts a second batch. “At least I know Axel will be taken care,” he speaks up. “He’s awful at taking care of himself. He apparently _forgets to eat_ sometimes.” He rolls his eyes. “How do you forget to eat?”

 

Isa chuckles. “That does sound like Lea.”  He pauses. “Except…he’s prepared breakfast for me a couple times before, so I can’t imagine he doesn’t prepare for himself.”

 

“This is Axel we’re talking about,” Xion announces her presence. “Of course he’s gonna make sure his friends are taken care of over himself.”

 

“Fair enough.”

 

She then smiles widely. “Wow, it smells great in here.”

 

“There’s coffee if you would like.”

 

“I’m not big on coffee but thank you.”

 

“Tea?”

 

“No, really, I’m all set.”

 

The toaster pops again. “Then this serving can be yours,” he goes on. He grabs her a plate and throws the toast and eggs on it before handing it over.

 

“What about you?” she asks as she takes the food from him. “Aren’t you gonna eat?”

 

“I will.” He stops to pour himself a cup of coffee first, though. He takes a few sips before continuing with cooking. He puts two more pieces of bread into the toaster and cracks two more eggs. “Thank you both for being so willing to help us move.”

 

Roxas sets his empty plate aside. “Why wouldn’t we help?”

 

“I just don’t want the two of you feeling like I’m…taking Lea from you, in a sense.”

 

“It’s not like you’re forcing him to move with you. It’s just as much his decision.” He sets his empty cup aside now, too. “Plus, not like you two are going very far.”

 

“And it gives us a reason to visit Sunset Terrace more often,” Xion says. Then she gestures at her plate with her fork. “This is really good.”

 

“It’s quite simple.”

 

“It’s still good.”

 

“Thought I smelt good food,” Lea says upon entering the kitchen. He grins. “Can I expect this kind of treatment every morning?”

 

Isa shrugs his shoulders. “So long as you don’t piss me off.”

 

He laughs. “Fair enough.” He pours himself a cup of coffee just as the third batch of toast pops. “Who hasn’t eaten yet?”

 

“This is your helping,” Isa tells him. He grabs a third plate and slides the eggs onto them. Lea grabs the toast and adds it to the plate. “Enjoy.”

 

“Thanks, man.”

 

With that, Isa puts two last pieces of bread into the toaster and starts cooking two eggs for himself.

 

“So, what’s the plan for today?” Xion asks.

 

“Ven, Terra, and Aqua are all coming to help out,” Lea starts. “Roxas, Ven, and Aqua will help me with my place. Terra and Xion will help Isa here.”

 

“Why do you get the extra help?”

 

“Because I have more shit than Isa,” he says through a mouth full of food. “You shouldn’t be complaining, though, when I’m gonna have to put up with the twins.”

 

“I resent that,” Roxas speaks up.

 

The toast pops as Isa turns off the burner. “When will they all be getting here?”

 

Lea checks the time on his phone. “Should be soon. We agreed on nine o’clock.”

 

They’re quiet while Isa eats, and Lea cleans off his plate. The two of them then finish off the coffee pot and wash the dishes. Roxas and Xion pack what’s left from there. And at nine o’clock on the dot, there’s a knock on the front door.

 

“Well, Aqua is with them,” Lea says. “Should’ve figured they’d be exactly on time.” He goes to answer the door. The rest of them wait in the kitchen. “Shit, what are you doing here?” they then hear the redhead exclaim.

 

Roxas and Xion are quick to move, but Isa stays put. Then they’re all making a fuss, so he goes to join them. And standing in the doorway on the other side of the room is—

 

“Son of a bitch,” Demyx says as soon as his eyes land on Isa. “So, it is true.” He nudges Lea’s arm with his elbow. “I almost didn’t wanna believe Ienzo when he told me.” He lets himself in and walks over to Isa, throwing an arm around his neck and causing Isa to freeze up. “I can touch the Second in Command.”

 

“Don’t call him that,” Ienzo says as he appears in the doorway.

 

Demyx instantly moves away from Isa, throwing his hands up as if he’s surrendering. “My bad.”

 

“I see you haven’t changed a bit,” Isa speaks up.

 

He grins. “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”

 

Ienzo shakes his head at him. “My apologies, Isa. Ven called me last night and asked if I could help out with the move today, and Demyx was present at the time and insisted on joining us, as well.”

 

“No worries,” Xion says. “The more the merrier.”

 

“Uhm, yeah, Demyx can help over at my place,” Lea says. “Ienzo, why don’t you stay to help out here?”

 

“That would probably be best,” Ienzo says. “The others are waiting outside.”

 

“All right. Roxas, Demyx, let’s get moving.” The redhead glances over at Isa and smiles. “See you on the other side.”

 

The three of them leave, and Terra enters a few moments later. He smiles. “Where do we start?”

 

They start with the smaller boxes. And with each box they load onto the ship, Isa believes more and more they’ll be able to make it in one trip. He really doesn’t have very many possessions. Hmm. Maybe that’ll change once he’s officially living with Lea. Maybe he’ll grow a bit more sentimental and attached to inanimate objects. Maybe…

 

There are only four boxes left, along with his mattress and bureau, by the time they’re finished with the first load.

 

“Wow, that was easier than I thought it would be,” Xion says.

 

“The couch and mattress might have to be done separately,” Ienzo goes on.

 

Isa shakes his head. “The couch can stay. If I take it with me, Lea will only end up burning it because it’s the most uncomfortable thing in the world.”

 

Terra laughs. “Let’s get going.”

 

They board the ship and make their way for Sunset Terrace, landing in the closest open area they can find. It’s not too far from the apartment, but this is when they’ll really need the help. Isa and Terra tag team the heavier boxes while Xion and Ienzo take some of the smaller boxes. They reach the apartment and drop everything by the front door. Isa looks around the space and smiles.

 

“Wow, this is really nice,” Xion speaks up. “No wonder you two are so excited.”

 

Terra places a hand on Isa’s shoulder. “And you get first dibs on the bedroom.”

 

“Lea and I actually decided on our rooms when we toured the apartment,” Isa tells them. “Mine will be the one on the left.”

 

Isa, Xion, and Terra leave to grab more boxes. Ienzo decides to stay behind and divvy out the boxes based on how they’re labeled and what rooms they’re meant to be in. As the three of them exit the front door, they spot Lea and the others making their way towards the place.

 

“Does it look as great now as it did before?” Lea asks.

 

Isa smiles.  “Even better.”

 

They continue to the ship and each grab another box of their own. Once everything is in the apartment, Aqua decides to stay behind and help Ienzo with the separating aspect of the process. The others all return to the ships and head back into Twilight Town. It only takes one extra trip for the rest of Isa’s belongings, but it takes another two for all of Lea’s stuff. As soon as everything is officially moved, Aqua and Terra take their leave. Lea and Isa thank them again, and they’re off. By this time, it’s almost one o’clock.

 

“This is way nicer than the places in Twilight Town,” Roxas says, looking around. “You two can actually afford this?”

 

“I don’t think they would’ve moved here if they couldn’t,” Xion says.

 

“How do we want to do this now?” Ienzo then asks. “We can separate into teams again to unpack everything.”

 

“Sounds good to me,” Lea says. “I’ll unpack the living room boxes with Xion, Ven, and Demyx. Isa, you can unpack the kitchen boxes with Roxas and Ienzo.”

 

Isa doesn’t argue. He doesn’t feel the need to. He just moves into the kitchen with Roxas and Ienzo and examines it. He checks the drawers and cabinets and visualises placements for everything. Once he’s got a good idea of how he wants the flow, he starts delegating boxes between the three of them. They aren’t nearly as talkative as the four in the next room over, but they can hear their conversations and find themselves laughing out loud due to them. The banter between Lea and Demyx is childish, yet entertaining. Soon enough, Xion enters the kitchen claiming she’s had enough of them. Isa kindly accepts her offer to help him instead and he assigns her a box of her own. Lea, Ventus, and Demyx don’t seem to notice she’s gone.

 

Once they’re done unpacking, it’s just past five o’clock.

 

“Well, gotta admit, that went way smoother than I had expected,” Lea says. They’re all gathered in the living area now. Resting. “It’s been a long day.”

 

“We’re not done yet, though,” Xion says. “Don’t we still have to help unpack the boxes for your bedrooms?”

 

Isa shakes his head. “Lea and I can do that part on our own.”

 

“Why?” Demyx smirks. “Ya got something to hide?”

 

He scoffs. “As if.”

 

He bursts out laughing. “Shit. Was that supposed to be Xigbar?” He laughs even harder. “That was _awesome._ ”

 

The rest of them join in on the laughter of the—awfully great—impression. Then it’s not long before Ventus, Ienzo, and Demyx have to leave. They exchange farewells, Lea and Demyx stating that they should get together more often. Then they’re gone. After that, Xion and Roxas don’t even stay much longer, either, claiming they have to give Lea and Isa time to really settle in. Isa can’t say he’s complaining. It’s been a long day and he’s exhausted from having been around so many people. He doesn’t mind spending the rest of the night with just Lea.

 

“What now?” the redhead asks once everyone is gone.

 

“I’d say we should work on our rooms, but I still think we should rest,” Isa says. “I might take a walk and get some fresh air.”

 

“Then I might take a nap.”

 

He chuckles, shaking his head at him. “Very well. I’ll wake you once I’m back.”

 

“Sounds good.”

 

With that, Lea stretches out on the couch. Isa smiles to himself before taking his leave. He walks around Sunset Terrace for a bit, and then finally makes his way to the hilltop. The sun is just beginning to set as he sits on the bench. He sits and watches and thinks about the fact that he has Lea to go home to. From now on, he’ll always have Lea to go home to. They spent a decade living under the same roof—in the same castle—yet this is already so different. It’s better. Hell, he never realised just how much he missed being able to feel. And sure, processing these emotions now still has its complications, but he’ll take those hitches over being heartless.

 

As the colour begins to diminish from the sky, he pulls out his phone. He takes a picture of the fading light, finding a sort of ironic beauty in it. When he looks back at it, he goes through the rest of his photos. Now that he and Lea have the apartment, he deletes the images he took of it. He deletes them until he’s at the picture of Lea looking at him from the Islands. In the image, Isa is clearly unaware of the attention he’s receiving. He can’t help but wonder if Lea is just as oblivious.

 

“You have one, too, huh?” Lea says from behind.

 

Isa jumps, nearly sending his phone flying. “Lea—” He brings his phone to his chest and breathes deep. “I thought you said you were going to sleep.”

 

The redhead doesn’t respond. Just comes around the bench and sits beside Isa. He pulls his own phone out and soon shows the screen to Isa. It’s a picture almost identical to the one on Isa’s phone except—Except in this one, it’s Isa who’s looking at Lea while Lea is seemingly unaware. “Kairi and Naminé stole our phones during the last visit we made to the Islands,” he says, and he chuckles. “Think they were trying to tell us something?” Isa swallows hard, unsure of how to respond. Lea puts his phone away. “It’s said that a picture is worth a thousand words.” He leans back. “Looks like we both got one.”

 

Isa still doesn’t know what to say. Doesn’t know what Lea might be getting at. Tch. That’s a lie. Of course he knows. He knows exactly what the redhead is referring to, but he’s still terrified to admit it out loud. Terrified of the consequences. Things are good enough right now. The last thing he wants is to ruin that. Even if that means not getting what he wants most.

 

“They did it on purpose,” Lea goes on. “Y’know, using your phone to take the picture of me looking at you and vice versa. They did it to prove a point.” He takes a deep breath. “In your picture, I was thinking about how proud of you I am. Proud of how much you’ve overcome. Because you’ve overcome way more than you give yourself credit for.”

 

“I think you give me too much credit sometimes,” Isa finally speaks up.

 

“I know. If you don’t give yourself credit, though, then someone’s gotta.” Now he leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “So, what was it were you thinking about in my picture?”

 

He swallows hard. “Just…you.” He shrugs his shoulders. No point in lying about it. No point in hiding. “How much you mean to me. How I don’t know where I’d be if it wasn’t for you. Tch. Probably still lost in the darkness.” He looks toward the fully darkened sky. “You’re the reason I fought to survive.”

 

“Isa…” He reaches for him, brushing a strand of his hair behind his ear. And for the first time, Isa turns away from the touch. Lea brings his hand back, surprised. “Do you…have feelings for me?” Isa cocks his head to the side, squeezing his eyes shut. No. He refuses to ruin everything they’ve built. Except…Lea is reaching for him again. Placing a hand on the nape of his neck. “I-it’s okay. I would actually be relieved if you said yes. I mean…I feel the same.” He pauses, bringing his hand back once again. “Well, I feel the same of what I hope you’re feeling, too.” He chuckles and it’s anxious sounding and that’s what gives Isa the courage to look over at him. “I’ve been feeling it for a long while now, just didn’t really know how to process it or whatever. Then I talked it out with Ienzo, and it all made sense.” Isa brings his gaze to Lea’s face, but the redhead is focused on his hands in his lap. “I get it, Isa. It’s a lot to take in. Hell, we went a decade without feeling anything at all and now these are some of the most intense feelings… It’s okay if you don’t know how to put them into words yet. I-I don’t, either. I just know that you mean everything to me and—” He finally meets Isa’s gaze. “A-and you gotta stop staring at me like that.” There’s that nervous chuckle again “It’s kinda freaking me out.”

 

Isa doesn’t know what’s come over him. A rush of courage. A rush of insanity. Whatever it is, it has him leaning towards Lea until their lips are pressed together. He lets himself linger for a moment before pulling back, but Lea chases right after him, recapturing his lips and bringing a hand to his face to cup his cheek. Isa can’t help but smile into the kiss as he grasps at the front of Lea’s shirt. When they break apart again, they’re both panting, out of breath, despite the simplicity.

 

“Well, that’s one way to put it,” Lea speaks first. He gently strokes his thumb along Isa’s jawline. He smiles and it’s more dazzling than the sun. More dazzling than the moon and all the stars. “The best way to put it.”

 

Isa laughs softly. He then tugs at Lea’s shirt, bringing him in for another kiss, which Lea gladly reciprocates. Their mouths sync together perfectly like they’ve been doing exactly this for the last decade rather than fighting it. And they’re kissing like they already can’t get enough of each other. Like their existence depends on it. It’s desperate and breathless and well overdue.

 

“Isa,” Lea manages to gasp out between kisses. Between their lips. “Isa, hey…” He pushes him back ever so slightly, chuckling softly. The sound echoes in Isa’s ears and only makes him want more. “I’m here,” he goes on, stroking his cheeks. “I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

 

He’s still holding the front of Lea’s shirt for dear life. “I did,” he finally speaks up.

 

“Huh?”

 

“I came back to you.”

 

He smiles and kisses Isa once more. And they kiss as if they’ll fade like the setting sun if they break apart. Isa doesn’t want to break apart. He doesn’t want to let go. He wants to remain in this moment forever. He wants to hold onto the redhead. Hold onto his red shirt. Hold onto this feeling.

 

“C’mon,” Lea says when he pulls away again. He’s still smiling. Still touching Isa. “Let’s go home.”

 

They do. They leave the bench behind and return to their new apartment. To their home. Where they can settle down together. They forget about unpacking and setting up their bedrooms for now and just curl up on the sofa. Lea holds onto Isa like he’ll lose him he if lets him go. Isa’s okay with this. He’s okay with being wrapped up in Lea’s arms. With not being let go. Except—

 

“I still have that gift for you,” Isa says.

 

“It can wait.”

 

“No. I want to give it to you now while I’m thinking of it.”

 

Lea sighs. “Fine.”

 

The redhead reluctantly opens his arms to release Isa. He then heads for the room that’s supposed to be his and grabs the bag he had brought home the night before. He returns to Lea on the couch, handing the bag to him. Lea is more willing to accept the gift than he was of letting Isa go. He sits up and eagerly pries the bag open. He pulls the first object out and unwraps it.

 

“Holy shit…” he says, smiling. He pulls the second object out and unwraps it. “Isa, these are—Wow…”

 

They’re two coffee mugs. One is a deep red with the design of a sun etched in gold. The other is a pale blue with the design of a crescent moon and attached star in silver. Lea is looking at them in awe. Taking them separately and rotating them in his hands to get a view from every angle. The expression on his face gives Isa that fluttering feeling in his stomach again.

 

“I believe I owed you two cups,” Isa speaks up.

 

Lea’s smile widens. “They’re perfect.” He carefully sets them on the end table. He then opens his arms and Isa crawls back into them. “Thank you.” He kisses his forehead and Isa buries his face in Lea’s chest. Lea chuckles softly and the sound rumbles in his chest. “Never say you owe me anything, though.”

 

“I owe you my life.”

 

He starts playing with Isa’s hair, but doesn’t say anything more on the matter. Neither of them says another word for the rest of the evening. They just enjoy each other’s company like they’ve been doing for weeks. Months. Except it’s better now. Isa can look up at Lea and kiss him now. And he does. Over and over. He already can’t get enough of him.

 

With every kiss, Isa forgets more and more. He forgets to worry. He forgets to stress. He forgets the nightmares and hallucinations. He forgets because he’s too busy getting Lea memorised.


	12. Surprise Visitors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omf the responses I got for the last chapter were absolutely incredible!! Each and every one of you who commented gave me the biggest shit-eating grin and made me laugh so hard, like...I can't even describe it lmao It was more than I had anticipated, though, so thank you all so much for brightening my day and I'm super glad y'all enjoyed the content of that chapter as much as y'all did. A lot had led up to that moment, but there's still more to come x3

Lea and Isa set up their bedrooms as normal. At first, they keep to their own rooms. After a few nights, though, Isa starts slipping into Lea’s bed halfway through the night. From there, they start switching off rooms. Isa will do anything and be anywhere if it means he can be in Lea’s arms. The place where he’s never felt warmer. Safer. More normal. Even if their new relationship is still a secret.

 

Isa wakes up and turns to see Lea still sleeping beside him. He smiles softly as he reaches for him. He brushes some of the messy, slept-on spikes out of his face before brushing his cheek with his knuckles. His green eyes flutter open and he smiles back.

 

“Good morning,” Lea says.

 

Isa’s heart skips a beat at the sound of his sleepy voice. “Please tell me you don’t have to work today.”

 

His smile widens. “Why? Ya wanna stay in bed all day?”

 

“Yes. I want a lazy day.”

 

“Well, you’re in luck.” He slips his arms around Isa and pulls him closer. “We don’t have to go anywhere.” He kisses his forehead. Isa closes his eyes as Lea kisses his nose. Then the scar. “I’m yours.”

 

He swallows hard. _I’m yours_. There’s so much implication in those words. He twines his legs with Lea’s and kisses him. It’s chaste, at first, but doesn’t take long to deepen. Isa lets out a soft, content sigh between kisses. Lea smiles and hums in response, reclaiming his lips. Isa tangles a hand into those red locks, relishing in the taste of him. In the feel of him. In the feel of his hands roving his body. Every curve and crevice. Isa can’t help but melt under that touch.

 

“Mine?” he speaks up as Lea’s lips move to his neck.

 

“Yours.” Lea smirks against his skin. “Get it memorised.”

 

He laughs as he tugs at his hair to pull him up and kiss him again. Next thing they know, there’s a knock at their front door. Isa breaks away, turning to look towards the bedroom door. Lea doesn’t let him go anywhere.

 

“What do you think you’re doing?” the redhead asks.

 

“I was going to go answer the door,” Isa says.

 

He pushes Isa down and gets half on top of him, kissing his neck again. “You’re the one who didn’t wanna get out of bed.”

 

He laughs, half at his comment and half at the feel of his lips against the sensitive spot of his jawline. “Lea…”

 

“Saying my name like that isn’t gonna make me stop.”

 

More laughter. And more knocking. “It could be important,” Isa goes on.

 

He sighs but returns to lying on his back. “Fine. You owe me, though.”

 

“You told me not to say that anymore.”

 

He pauses. “Shit.”

 

He chuckles again, kissing Lea on the cheek before climbing out of bed. He checks himself and heads for the front door. When he opens it—

 

“ _Surprise_ ,” Kairi and Naminé call out from the other side.

 

He smiles at the sight of them. “What are you doing here?”

 

Kairi returns the smile. “We heard you and Axel moved into a new place, so we thought we’d drop by and check it out.”

 

Lea comes out of the room. “I thought I heard your voice.” Kairi rushes over to him and throws her arms around him in a tight hug. “It’s good to see you two off the Islands.”

 

“We wanted to see your new place,” Naminé says. “And we figured it would only be fair since you guys are always coming to see us.”

 

Isa closes the door. “I’ll make breakfast.” And he heads for the kitchen.

 

Lea gives the girls a quick tour of the apartment while Isa brews a pot of coffee and makes a batch of pancakes.

 

“Is Riku gone away?” Isa asks when they finally join him in the kitchen.

 

“He’s gone again, yeah,” Kairi says. She lets out a heavy sigh. “I just hope he really can bring Sora home soon. Then things can go back to being completely normal.”

 

Lea scoffs. “Normal is overrated.”

 

“Says you.”

 

“How have you two been?” Naminé goes on. “How are the jobs?”

 

Now Lea shrugs his shoulders. “Nothing special, really. Nothing like lounging around on the beach all day.”

 

“Hey, we do not just lounge around all day,” Kairi says. “We work, too. Maybe only part-time, but that’s because we’re also students.”

 

“Nice excuse.”

 

Naminé moves to the counter to stand beside Isa while Lea and Kairi continue with their playful sibling-like banter. “You seem happier,” she says.

 

Isa smiles in response. “I suppose I am.”

 

“Do you finally feel fully adjusted?”

 

“I’m not sure.” He adds to the stack of pancakes he has built up. “Maybe.” He pours more batter on the skillet. “I haven’t had any episodes or nightmares since moving in here.”

 

She smiles now. “That’s great, Isa.”

 

“What about you? Have you figured out yet if not being able to draw is good or bad?”

 

“I think so.” She pauses. “I actually tried drawing quite recently. It’s been a while, so the drawing itself was pretty bad, but it still felt good. I think I’ll be able to pick it up again. I mean, I guess the drawing aspect of my purpose wasn’t the most terrible part of my experience in Castle Oblivion.”

 

“Well, I’m glad to hear you’re overcoming it.”

 

She giggles. “You still speak so formally to us. We’re your friends, not your colleagues. You can relax with us.”

 

“Sorry. I suppose that’s just one of the things I’m too used to.”

 

“Oh. What do you think was the most terrible part of the Organisation for you?” she then asks.

 

He takes a deep breath. He flips the last couple of pancakes onto the stack before turning off the skillet and turning around. He watches Lea as he falls to immaturity with Kairi, the two of them making faces at each other and making fun of each other. He chuckles to himself. The most terrible part of the Organisation…

 

“Losing sight of myself and in turn losing my friendship with Lea,” he says. “A lot of the things he did—Everything that happened in Castle Oblivion, he only did because I asked him to do it. Because I wanted to climb my way to the top of the ranks. I was so selfish, but he did it all for me selflessly. And—Well, I only asked him to do those things for me because I wanted to know I still meant something to him. So, when he got to the point of refusal—”

 

“That’s when you realised you had lost him,” Naminé finishes for him.

 

He nods. “And it took me just as long to realise it had been my own fault.”

 

“Does Lea know this?”

 

He glances back over at the two redheads, still in their own little world. “He knows I was jealous.” There’s so much more to it than just that. “He doesn’t know the rest.”

 

“You should tell him.”

 

“Perhaps another day.”

 

“Don’t wait too long.”

 

“You two look way too serious right now,” Lea then says. “That’s not allowed.”

 

Naminé laughs again. “I think Isa’s done cooking.”

 

“Ah. Yes, I am.” He takes the plate of pancakes and places them in the centre of the table. “Who would like coffee?”

 

Kairi and Naminé both politely decline, so Isa pours a cup for himself and Lea. In their new mugs. The only mugs the two of them will drink out of now. He places Lea’s in front of him before sitting at the last empty seat around the table, giving him a perfect view of that spikey red hair and those vibrant green eyes.

 

“Those cups are so cute,” Kairi speaks up.

 

Lea smiles. “Isa got them.”

 

“They’re incredible.”

 

“Very fitting, too,” Naminé goes on.

 

Isa nods his head once. “That’s why I chose them.”

 

They all eat in silence. Although, Lea and Kairi are still making stupid faces to each other, causing Naminé to laugh in between bites. Isa only rolls his eyes at them. Playfully. The truth of the matter is that he always felt comfortable around Kairi and Naminé. From the get-go, they welcomed him. He had been reluctant on how Kairi would respond to him, but the girl doesn’t seem to hold a grudge. Or she’s very prone to giving second chances. She had given Lea one, after all, and he was the one who physically kidnapped her. Plus, it would only make sense seeing as Riku had fallen to the darkness at one point, and she’s a Princess of Heart. Her identity is practically based around purity. Although, he’s heard plenty of stories from Lea about just how well she can handle herself. No one should want to get on her bad side.

 

By the time their all done eating, both girls have had three pancakes, while Isa’s had four and Lea has had six.

 

“How do you eat like that, yet keep that figure?” Kairi asks.

 

Lea laughs. “I take care of myself.”

 

“Roxas would beg to differ,” Isa says.

 

“Shut up.”

 

Naminé giggles and watches Isa as he pours another cup of coffee. “Isn’t that your fourth cup already?”

 

Isa shrugs his shoulders, turning to lean against the counter. “I suppose it could be.”

 

“Man, you need to lay off,” Lea says, leaning back in his chair. “You’re not gonna be able to sleep tonight, at this rate.”

 

“I’ll be fine.”

 

“Hey, you two will show us around town, right?” Kairi then says. “Maybe not so much Twilight Town, but Sunset Terrace.”

 

“Not much to show,” Lea says.

 

“Oh, come on.” Naminé says. “There has to be a reason you two wanted to move out this way. Show us that reason.”

 

“But then it wouldn’t be a secret anymore.” He looks toward Isa and winks. Isa blushes softly and he chuckles. “I’m kidding. Yeah, we can show you around.”

 

Kairi’s resting her chin in the palm of her hand, grinning widely. “You two are so cute.” Neither Lea nor Isa looks at her in response. “C’mon, you can tell us. There _is_ something going on between you two, right?”

 

Isa lifts his gaze just enough to get a look at Lea. He scratches the back of his head like he does when he’s trying to come up with a way to beat around the bush. Isa takes a deep breath as he lifts his head and sets the mug down firmly. No point in lying. Especially to these two. “Yes,” he says.

 

Kairi and Naminé look over at him with wide eyes, more surprised that he admitted it than by the truth itself. Lea, who was still leaning back in his chair, topples backwards to the floor. The girls jump from their chairs, gasping. Isa pushes himself off the counter to kneel beside him.

 

“I’m good,” Lea says. “My hair broke my fall.”

 

Isa shakes his head at him. “You’re such an idiot.” He then helps the redhead back to his feet and fixes the chair. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

 

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He shakes it off. “Uhm…”

 

Kairi starts laughing. “We knew it.”

 

Lea rolls his eyes. “Yeah, y’know, we gotta give you props on those pictures you took of us so discreetly.”

 

“That was Naminé’s idea.”

 

Naminé blushes at this. “You two just looked so in love. And we had a feeling you were both completely oblivious to it, so we wanted to find a way to show you.”

 

Lea laughs. “Guess we should be thanking you two.”

 

Isa’s frozen. _In love_? The thought seems…intense. Love is a strong feeling. Is he actually in love with Lea? Well, he loves running his fingers through that head of spikes. He loves staring into those piercing green eyes. He loves the way Lea smiles at him. The way Lea touches him. The way Lea can always make him feel so much better without even trying. It’s effortless. Their relationship is effortless. And Isa loves that.

 

Hmm. Maybe he is in love with him, after all.

 

There’s a hand on his shoulder. “You still with us?” Lea checks.

 

Isa shakes his head. “Yes. Sorry.”

 

“Let’s get dressed and we can show them around the area.”

 

They do just that. Isa is ready first, braiding his hair in the living room while they wait for Lea. Once he comes out, he smiles at Isa, causing him to blush. The four of them then leave the apartment. The tour of Sunset Terrace doesn’t take too long, but both Kairi and Naminé thoroughly enjoy the market, each of them picking out little knickknacks to bring back to the islands with them. Lea pays for them, against their protests.

 

By the time they finish around Sunset Terrace, it’s barely one o’clock in the afternoon. So, they decide to head into Twilight for lunch, choosing to go to the café Lea works at. All three of them tell Isa he’s not allowed to order coffee. He settles for tea.

 

“This place is nice,” Naminé says as she looks around. “I enjoy the atmosphere.”

 

“It doesn’t seem like a place where you’d work,” Kairi goes on.

 

“Funny you should say that because Roxas thinks the service industry is perfect for me.” Lea shrugs his shoulders. “Eh, either way, it pays the bills. That’s what matters.”

 

Naminé leans towards Isa. “What is it you do again?”

 

“I edit articles for the local paper,” Isa says.

 

Kairi’s eyes widen. “Oh, that’s _perfect_ for you.” She smiles. “I bet you do really well with that job.”

 

“Hey, what are you guys doing here?” Roxas then asks as he and Xion enter the café. He smiles. “And why are we only just finding out?”

 

Naminé smiles. “Oh, we stopped by to see their new place.”

 

“Yeah, since we weren’t asked to help with the move itself,” Kairi goes on.

 

Naminé laughs. “Then we asked for a tour and decided to come here for lunch.”

 

Xion places her hands on her hips. “Why weren’t we included in this?”

 

“Sorry,” Kairi says. “We’ll be sure to invite you next time.”

 

“Next time.” Roxas rolls his eyes, but he’s still smiling. “No worries, we already had plans today anyhow.”

 

“Then what the hell are ya complaining about?” Lea speaks up. He shakes his head. “You two always gotta be so dramatic.”

 

“Look who’s talking,” Isa says.

 

“Hey, I resent that.”

 

They all laugh. Roxas and Xion aren’t around much longer before they leave to meet up with Hayner, Pence, and Olette.

 

“Does anyone know that you two are together?” Naminé asks once they’re gone.

 

“Ienzo has an idea,” Isa says. “Lea talked to him about it a while back and he’s talked to me about it.”

 

Lea raises an eyebrow. “When did he talk to you about it?”

 

“Probably after you spoke with him.”

 

“Huh.”

 

“Why haven’t you told anyone?” Kairi goes on.

 

Lea shrugs again as he folds his arms across his chest. “I dunno. We’re still figuring it out ourselves. Guess we wanna work out all the kinks before we go public. Plus, there’s really no way of knowing how any of the others will react.”

 

“They’re your friends, so they won’t care.”

 

Naminé nods. “Yeah, if anything, they’ll just be happy for you.”

 

“Of course they’ll be happy for you.”

 

After lunch, Isa pays, and they head back to the station. Kairi and Naminé decide to leave from there. They both hug Lea and Isa goodbye and thank them for the day out. They wait until the train to the Islands goes, and then they return to their apartment in Sunset Terrace. As soon as they walk through the front door, Isa beelines for the kitchen to wash all the dishes they had left behind that morning. Lea follows him, though, wrapping his arms around him and kissing the back of his neck.

 

“We should finish what we started this morning,” he says, his voice low.

 

“I can’t leave these sitting any longer,” Isa says. “Otherwise, they’ll be nearly impossible to clean with all the dried syrup.”

 

He kisses his neck once more. “Fine.” And he steps away to sit at the table. He watches Isa for a couple seconds. “What were you and Naminé talking about earlier?”

 

He freezes for a short moment. “We were just…talking.”

 

“Isa, c’mon, you two really did look like you were having a serious conversation. And if you can talk to Naminé about it, then you should be able to talk to me about it.”

 

He lets out a heavy sigh but doesn’t say anything else. Neither does Lea. They both just wait in silence until Isa has finished washing the dishes. Then Isa dries off his hands and joins Lea at the table. Lea promptly reaches across to take the other’s hands in his own. He never misses a beat.

 

“Please tell me,” he says, his voice soft.

 

“We were talking about our adjustments to our new lives,” Isa starts. “It seems Naminé was having some pretty bad nightmares at first, as well. So, we were talking a bit about that and how we’ve been overcoming it.” He pauses before taking a deep breath. “Then she had asked me what the worst part of the Organisation had been for me.”

 

Lea squeezes his hands a little more tightly. Comfortingly. “What did you tell her?”

 

“The truth.” He brings his gaze up to meet the green eyes across from. “Losing myself and in turn losing my friendship with you.”

 

It’s clear that Lea isn’t sure whether he should smile or not. The corners of his lips are twitching, but his expression doesn’t change. “You didn’t lose me, Isa.”

 

“I pushed you away.” He shakes his head, chuckling sheepishly. “Y’know, I told her how I made you do all these things for me because I wanted proof that I still meant something to you. But—” He stops short. Now that he’s had so many weeks to process everything, he’s realised that so much has been left unsaid. So much that he didn’t understand at first. And now Lea is sitting across from him, holding his hands like he would fall away if he were to let go.

 

“But what?” he asks, bringing Isa back.

 

He swallows hard. “I told her I had been jealous, but the truth is…there’s so much more to it than just that. I didn’t get into those details with Naminé—”

 

“Get into them with me, then. Talk to me. Remember—”

 

“The only way you can help me is if I talk to you,” he finishes for him. “I know. I’ve got it memorised.”

 

Now Lea smiles. “Then talk to me.”

 

“I was selfish,” Isa tells him. “I wanted to climb my way to the top and I was willing to put you in harm’s way to do so. Far too willing. But you kept doing just as I asked of you with no complaints. So, I took advantage of that. Then you started growing close with Roxas and Xion. And I quickly learned that the only way to get through to you would be to use your relationship with them against you. Or I tried to, at least.” He closes his eyes. “You began growing distant and acting more rogue, so I—I thought I could guilt trip you. I thought it would make a difference.” He squeezes his eyes a little tighter. “That’s when I claimed you were the one who had forgotten everything, but in truth, I was the one who had forgotten. Roxas and Xion are the ones who helped you to remember.” He reopens his eyes to meet that burning green gaze again. “That’s what had made me jealous. That’s what made me act the way I did, even if I hadn’t realised it at the time.”

 

Lea’s smile has fallen away. He’s still holding onto Isa’s hands, though, even as he gets up and moves around the table to kneel before him. “You weren’t the only one pushing,” he says. “I pushed you away, too. I—” He shakes his head. “Hell, I didn’t even want any of the memories of our prior life. Not after seeing what the transformation had done to you. Seeing the person that it had turned you into.”

 

“That was no person,” Isa says, his voice low. “He was a monster…”

 

He takes one hand to cup the other’s cheek. “But you were still in there. And no matter how hard I tried to keep my distance, I just couldn’t. I wasn’t gonna lose you.” He gently traces the edges of one of the scars. “I wasn’t gonna let you get hurt again.”

 

“This wasn’t your fault.”

 

“I should’ve been there. Because that was the real moment everything changed. That was the moment that broke you.” Isa’s breath catches in his throat. “All because of some _stupid_ argument,” Lea goes on, “that I don’t even remember.” He shakes his head. “I did all that you asked of me because you did still mean something to me. Not only because it helped move you up in the ranks, but also because I knew I was protecting you. And I get that you think I stopped listening to your orders, but I never did. Even after I became friends with Roxas and Xion, I still did all those _icky_ jobs for you. I still went after them when you told me to. And I continued doing those jobs because I knew it would keep you safe.”

 

“Why did you want to protect me after all I had done?”

 

“Like I said, Isa, I knew you were still in there. And I sure as hell wasn’t gonna give up on you. How many times do I have to tell you that?”

 

“One more time won’t hurt.”

 

He chuckles. “Nothing will ever come between us. No one can ever get between us.”

 

Isa leans down to capture Lea’s lips in a searing kiss. He returns the kiss with just as much passion. And it’s moments like this when the rest of the world fades away. Moments like this when they’re the only two beings in existence. Moments like this that Isa wouldn’t give up for anything. He won’t give the redhead up for anything. And in moments like this—when Lea presses him against the wall and breathes Isa’s name between parted lips—he knows he feels the same.

 

This is what it means to be in love.


	13. The Golden Hour

As the next few days pass, Lea and Isa see less and less of each other. Lea’s working shifts overnight at the café in preparation of some reconstruction while Isa’s swamped with so many articles, he spends most of his time at the office reading through them rather than reading them from home. They’re on completely opposite schedules; they see each other in passing each morning and night and that’s pretty much the extent of it.

 

It’s when Isa’s on the train ride home that evening—at least two weeks into Lea’s shift change—that he gets a call from Kairi.

 

“Hey, Isa, how are you?” she greets him.

 

“Tired but managing,” he says. “Is something wrong?”

 

“Not really.” She pauses. “Axel’s not…mad at me, right?”

 

“What? No, of course not. Why would you think that?”

 

“He hasn’t answered or returned any of my calls lately.”

 

He shakes his head. “That’s because he’s been strictly working overnight shifts for almost two weeks now. The café is renovating and they’re getting most of the work done while the place is closed.”

 

“And Axel’s been stuck with all the overnights?”

 

“He’s the only one they trust, apparently.”

 

“Well, that sounds like their own problem.”

 

“He’s getting paid time and a half for it, so he has no complaints. He sleeps throughout the day, though, which is why you haven’t heard from him.”

 

Her eyes widen a bit. “This has been going on for two weeks? That must be really tough for you.”

 

He shrugs his shoulders. “It is what it is. I’ve been keeping myself occupied.” He blushes softly. “I suppose I do still miss him, though.”

 

Now she smiles. “That’s so sweet.”

 

“How’s Naminé?” he asks, wanting to direct the subject away from his relationship with Lea. “And have you heard from Riku?”

 

“Oh, Naminé’s great. She’s doing really well. Been drawing up a storm lately.” She takes a deep breath. “As for Riku…he’s been hard to reach again. I mean, I know he’s just fine because I know he can handle himself, but that doesn’t mean I don’t worry about him. Plus, he said he came up with a way to get Sora back, but he never elaborated on his plan, and that in and of itself is more than concerning. I just don’t want him to do anything stupid or reckless.”

 

“If Riku sacrificed himself to get Sora back, Sora would be upset and probably feel guilty about it, no?”

 

“He would, yeah.”

 

“Well, I’m sure Riku is aware of that, so I’m sure his plan wouldn’t include something as stupid and reckless as that.”

 

She smiles sheepishly. “Yeah, I bet you’re right…” She sighs. “Well, I’ll let you go. Thanks for chatting with me, and please let Axel know to reach out to me as soon as he can. Even if it’s in the middle of the night.”

 

“I will tell him.”

 

“Bye, Isa.” And she hangs up.

 

Isa pockets the phone just as the train comes to its stop. He exits and heads straight home. He truly is fatigued and wants nothing more than to relax. Maybe take a hot shower and steep a pot of tea. Do some light reading. Ugh. Or maybe not. He’s not sure he can read another word.

 

When he finally steps into the apartment, a soothing scent fills the air. He breathes deep and makes his way into the kitchen. Lea is there pouring tea into Isa’s mug.

 

“Hey, stranger,” the redhead greets him. He smiles, holding the cup out. “Looks like my timing is perfect as ever.”

 

Isa walks up to him and takes the mug only to place it on the counter. He then takes Lea’s now empty hand in his own and wraps his other arm around his waist, pulling him close and kissing him hard. The kiss is a mess, Lea half-grinning and laughing too much to kiss back. When he finally does, though, it’s perfect. Filled with longing. Hell, they haven’t even had time for a moment like this in forever.

 

“I’ve missed you,” Isa says once he breaks away.

 

“I’ve been right here.”

 

“We haven’t actually seen each other, though.” He kisses him again. “Seeing each other in passing isn’t enough.”

 

“And you have the nerve to call me a sap.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

“It’ll be over in another couple of weeks,” he then says, smoothing Isa’s hair back. “Then I get a whole week off.” He smirks. “You should take that time off, too. Maybe we’ll spend it at the Islands or the Gardens. Better yet, maybe we can go somewhere completely new. Just the two of us.”

 

He returns the smirk. “Sounds divine.”

 

Now he’s chuckling, but it’s low, reverberating from the back of his throat. “You’re such a dork.” Lea’s phone is going off before their lips have the chance to connect once more. He pulls away entirely to look at the time, cursing under his breath. “I have to get going.” He brushes Isa’s hair behind his ear. “Just a couple more weeks. It’ll be over before you know it.”

 

“I waited a decade. What’s a couple more weeks?”

 

“Tch.” He smiles. “You are a sap.” Lea then kisses the bridge of Isa’s nose—the centre of his scar—before taking his leave. Isa watches the door as it closes behind the redhead. He takes a deep breath and reaches for the cup of tea. He’s exhausted. The shower can wait until morning. Instead, he’ll enjoy the tea and go straight to bed.

 

Except he doesn’t rest well. At all. Isa awakes from a dead slumber in a cold sweat. He’s shivering, despite being covered. He sits up, his throat dry as he gasps for air. It almost feels like he was being choked in his sleep. He looks around the too dark room, his nerves on the rise. There’s a figure at the end of the bed. A hooded figure with glowing yellow eyes. He squeezes his eyes shut and opens them. The phantom is gone. He swings his feet around to the floor, but as he stands, the whole room turns on its side. He stumbles his way to the bathroom as the room spins in every which direction. When he finally reaches the vanity, he turns the faucet on, splashing cold water on his face. He takes a few deep breaths. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. When he looks up at his reflection, though, he sees yellow eyes staring back. No. Damn it. He’s been doing so well. Why is this happening now? Why is this—?

 

He drops to his knees, crawling over to the toilet. He lifts the cover just in time. The room is still spinning, and the vomiting isn’t helping his already dry throat. Now it’s painful. He heaves a couple more times before finding his way back to the sink. He forces himself to his feet and splashes more water on his face. He doesn’t want to look at his reflection again, but he does so anyhow. He still sees yellow eyes staring back. Glaring back. Yellow eyes and an accentuated scar. Like it’s been enlarged. He shakes his head as he stumbles back, knocking—He knocks something over. He’s not sure what. Doesn’t care. The room won’t stop spinning. He looks towards the open doorway and the hooded figure is back. Looming over him. He rushes at it, but the shadow dissipates just as he comes into contact with it. He can’t stop his momentum, though, stumbling forward until he nearly flips over the sofa.

 

“ _Saïx_?” a voice then says.

 

He shakes his head, pushing himself away from the couch. “Don’t call me that…”

 

“Huh? Call you what? _Saïx_ , what is going on?”

 

“Stop it.” He faces the source of the voice. “Stop calling me that.” The figure tries stepping up to him, but he only stumbles away. “Don’t come near me.”

 

“Calm down and let me help you.” He keeps stepping toward him, reaching for him now. “C’mon, _Saïx_ , come—”

 

“No,” he goes on. “Don’t touch me.” He shoves the figure away from him, this time able to actually make contact with it. He then stumbles back to his bedroom. “Don’t—”

 

_That’s it. Give in. Let the darkness take you. Welcome it back. You know you want to. You know this is the only life you are worthy of. It’s the only life you deserve._

 

He holds his pounding head, squeezing his eyes shut. No. That’s not true. It can’t be true. He won’t give in. That’s not what he wants. All he wants is—

 

There’s a hand on his shoulder and his eyes snap open. He turns on the figure and shoves him up against the nearest wall, holding his forearm across his neck. Something’s wrong, though. The figure… He’s not fighting back. Why isn’t he fighting back?

 

“I’m here,” the figure goes on. “Please… Please come back to me.” He feels the phantom swallow hard against his arm. “ _Isa_ —”

 

His breath catches in his throat and he steps back, releasing the figure. The figure coughs as Isa drops to his knees. He shakes his head and his eyes widen. No… What the hell just happened? He didn’t—He couldn’t have—He glances up and his eyes adjust to the night as he finally manages to make out the figure.

 

“Lea…”

 

Lea’s eyes are closed. He has one hand rubbing at his neck and brings the other hand up to silence Isa. He then steps out of the bedroom. Isa’s cheeks are already wet with shed tears. He’s trying to remember how to breath, but he can’t. He hunches over himself and pounds the floor. Damn it. He’s such an idiot. How could he—? Just the thought of it is making him sick.

 

Sick.

 

Isa stumbles and trips to his feet as he rushes for the bathroom again. He reunites with the toilet as the urge to vomit overcomes him once more. He heaves and sobs at the same time. Soon enough, there’s a pair of hands holding his hair back. At this point, his head is resting against the toilet seat. He swallows hard and there’s a sting in his throat. Tears are still streaming down his cheeks.

 

“I’m so sorry,” he chokes out.

 

Lea still doesn’t say anything. He just sits and braids Isa’s hair before simply playing with it. Isa repeats the apology. Over and over. He repeats it until his eyes are dried out and his cheeks are stained. Until he can no longer keep his eyes open.

 

Isa awakes with a start. He looks around to see that he’s back in his room. Tucked in his bed. Good. This is good. Maybe this means it was all just some realistic dream. Just some weird episode. An awful episode. Except the sting in this throat seems all too real. Hmm. He slowly climbs out of bed. He’s light-headed. The room is still spinning. But that would happen after a rough night’s sleep. He takes a deep breath and pushes himself to his feet. He stumbles a bit as he makes his way to the kitchen.

 

That’s when he knows.

 

Lea is leaning against the counter with a blank expression. Upon entering the kitchen, he doesn’t even glance up at Isa. Just keeps his gaze to the floor. Isa wants to collapse to the floor all over again. He opts for a chair at the table instead.

 

“You wanna tell me what the fuck happened last night,” Lea speaks up.

 

He cringes at the redhead’s choice of words, his eyes already wet again. “I-I don’t know. I’m so sorry, Lea. I didn’t mean—I didn’t realise it was you. All I saw was some hooded figure. I thought it was another sort of hallucination.” He shakes his head, tears streaking his cheeks. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to—I would never—” He squeezes his eyes shut. “I’m sorry…”

 

He pauses. “What were you hearing last night? When I was talking to you?”

 

“I was hearing _his_ name.”

 

Now he lets out a heavy sigh before setting his mug down and moving to kneel before Isa. “I’m taking you to see Ienzo and Even today.” Isa nods. “Not because I don’t trust you, but because I want you to get the help you need,” Lea goes on, cupping his cheeks and wiping away the escaped tears. “You had me worried last night. I was terrified. For a second there, I didn’t think you were gonna come back to me.”

 

“How can you—?” He pulls the redhead’s hands away. “You should be furious.”

 

His brow furrows. “Why?”

 

He’s ashamed to even admit it. “I hurt you…”

 

“Because of a condition you have no control over. Being angry with you over that doesn’t seem like it would be very fair.”

 

“What if it wasn’t the PTSD, though? What if it was—?”

 

“Don’t even go there. It’s not that.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

Another pause. “What colour did you see your eyes as last night?”

 

His gaze drops. “They were yellow.”

 

“In your reflection, maybe. I still saw _your_ eyes, though. These teal eyes that I’ve come to love.”

 

“You’re too good to me.”

 

He gets back to his feet. “Ven’s already on his way. Go take a shower. We’ll leave once you’re ready.” Isa stands, as well. He brings his gaze to Lea’s neck. The redhead easily catches on. “I don’t have any marks, if that’s what you’re looking for.”

 

He swallows hard. “Lea—”

 

“I know. You’re sorry.” He smiles sheepishly. “Go shower.”

 

With that, he makes his way for the bathroom. He turns the water on before looking in the mirror. No yellow eyes. Just teal. And the scar is more faded than ever. He breathes deep. In through the nose. Out through the mouth.

 

He keeps the shower short. And when he comes out of the bathroom, he hears Lea talking with someone in the kitchen. He can only assume it’s Ventus. When they enter the living room, though, it’s Demyx who’s with him.

 

Demyx grins at the sight of Isa in just a towel. “Nice look.”

 

Heat rises to Isa’s cheeks as he returns to his own bedroom to get fully dressed. He hears Demyx laughing from the other side of the door. He sighs and finishes drying himself off before dawning himself in his new attire. He then returns to the living room to rejoin Lea and Demyx.

 

“I wasn’t expecting you,” he says.

 

“Ven stopped by the lab first and I told him I’d pick you guys up,” Demyx says.

 

He cocks an eyebrow. “Do you spend all your time at the lab now?”

 

“Not all of it, but I’m there whenever I can be.”

 

Lea chuckles. “Why? That doesn’t seem like your scene.”

 

Demyx shrugs his shoulders. “Pretty much the same reason you two moved in together.” He smiles and heads for the front door. “All right. Let’s go.”

 

Isa pauses. “What did he mean by that?”

 

“I dunno,” Lea says. “C’mon.”

 

And they make their way for Radiant Gardens. Demyx does most of the talking during the trip over, which both Lea and Isa seem to be fine with. Then when they arrive at the lab, they’re both more than thankful for Ienzo and Even sending him away until they’re through.

 

“How are we feeling this morning?” Even starts.

 

“He only vomited those two times last night,” Lea tells them. “He hasn’t eaten anything yet today, though.”

 

“Any input, Isa?”

 

Isa takes a deep breath. “I’m a little dizzy. Not as nauseated.”

 

“Could you explain to us what happened last night?” Ienzo then asks. “Give us whatever details you recall.”

 

“I woke up in a cold sweat and everything was spinning. I saw a hooded figure with glowing yellow eyes at the end of my bed, but it vanished. Then I went to the bathroom and when I looked at my reflection, I saw myself with yellow eyes. That was when I got sick the first time. When I finished throwing up, I saw the hooded figure again standing in the doorway. So, I went after it, but it vanished again. That must’ve been about the time Lea came home. He was talking to me and just trying to calm me down, but for some reason, I kept hearing him referring to me as—” He swallows hard. “As _Saïx_ rather than Isa. I don’t know why. He would never call me that. Hasn’t called me that since the day I was recompleted. Either way, I kept yelling at him to stop calling me such and telling him not to touch me or come near me. And then—” He stops short again.

 

“Then what?” Even prompts.

 

“He pinned me to the wall,” Lea takes over once it’s clear Isa can’t keep talking about it. “Had me in a bit of a chokehold.”

 

Ienzo’s eyes widen. “And you…?”

 

“Kept my cool. Said what I always say to him when he has episodes. I told him to come back to me.”

 

“And that still worked this time?”

 

“Took a little bit longer than usual, but yeah, it still worked.”

 

“What happened after that?”

 

“That was when I stepped out to call you.”

 

“Isa?”

 

Isa jolts at the sound of his name. “Oh. Uhm.” He shakes his head. “I got sick again after that. Passed out practically hugging the toilet.”

 

“Is this the first you’ve ever gotten violent during an episode?” Even checks.

 

“Yes,” Lea says, quick to answer.

 

Ienzo nods. “Very well.” He leans towards Even, muttering in his ear. Even nods as well as he jots a couple things down before walking away. Ienzo then focuses back on Lea and Isa. “Okay. So, I’m thinking we’ll run a couple more tests and maybe draw another couple of blood samples.”

 

Isa swallows hard. “What kind of tests?”

 

“Won’t the blood samples be enough?” Lea asks.

 

“We need to see how he reacts under certain circumstances.” He pauses. “Speaking of, do you know if you had a nightmare that may have triggered this episode?”

 

Now Isa shakes his head. “Not that I recall, no.”

 

“Hmm. I see.” He gets to his feet. “I’ll be right back.” And he leaves through the sliding steel doors.

 

“What’s wrong with me?” Isa speaks up after a long moment of silence.

 

“Nothing is wrong with you,” Lea says.

 

“I hurt you.”

 

“You didn’t hurt me.”

 

“Lea—”

 

“Stop it. You’re fine.”

 

Ienzo returns. “Lea, may we speak with you for just a moment?”

 

Lea joins Ienzo and Even on the other side of the doors, leaving Isa alone. He takes a deep breath. He’s fine. Of course he’s fine. He has to be. Yeah. He’s fine. And he’ll keep telling himself that until—

 

Lea finally comes back. He walks across the room and kneels before Isa as he always does. He rests his chin on his knees. “No tests,” he says. “They just need to do bloodwork.”

 

“Why—?”

 

“Because you don’t need to go through that other bullshit.”

 

With that, Lea takes Isa by the hand and leads him into the next room. And he doesn’t let go of his hand until Ienzo and Even have drawn the two samples of blood they need. But as they take their leave, Ienzo stops Lea again. They speak soft yet firmly to each other. Isa watches them until Lea turns away with a huff. That’s when they finally leave the lab. Lea’s pace is quicker than normal, so Isa stops him as soon as they’re out.

 

“What was that about?” he asks.

 

“Nothing,” Lea says.

 

“Don’t lie to me.” He lets out an exasperated sigh. “Ienzo’s going to check that DNA mark again, isn’t he? To see if it’s changed or expanded or—or…whatever.” Lea doesn’t say a word. “Why? I thought he said the odds of it taking over were slim to none. Why would he feel the need to have to check it again?”

 

“Can we just get home first?”

 

“No, I want to talk about this now. I want you to tell me what you two were talking about in that hushed tone. What’s wrong with me?”

 

“Nothing is wrong with. Stop saying that.”

 

He pauses and his face drops. His entire composure drops. “You saw it, didn’t you? My eyes… Even if it was just a flash, you still saw it. They were yellow.”

 

Lea sighs. “Isa—”

 

“You can’t lie to me about that.”

 

“I didn’t want you to worry.”

 

“That’s not a good enough reason. Damn it…” He covers his face with his hands. “This isn’t a good idea anymore.”

 

“What isn’t?”

 

He swallows hard before meeting his gaze. “Us.”

 

Isa can’t look at Lea when he’s looking at him like _that_ in return. Hell, he’s never been so relieved to see Demyx in all of his existence.

 

“Hey, you two finished sooner than expected,” he greets them. “Awesome. Let’s get out of here, then. This place is boring as hell.”

 

They’re all quiet at first. Isa’s gaze is turned down, watching their feet as they walk along the cobblestone streets.

 

“Hey, Dem, what did you mean earlier?” Lea soon breaks the silence. “About the reason why you hang around the lab is somehow the same reason Isa and I decided to move in together.”

 

“Uhm…” Demyx chuckles. “The fact that you two are into each other,” he says. “C’mon, don’t tell me you two actually thought you were good at hiding it.” More laughter. “Man, everyone knows about you two. You guys have made it obvious. I mean, I picked up on it after only a day of being around you two.”

 

Isa zones in and out of the conversation the rest of the way home. By the time he and Lea get back to the apartment, he’s far past relieved. He’s grateful for the familiar, cozy space. He collapses onto the couch, his head pounding. He doesn’t want to move for the rest of the day. But when he notices Lea still standing by the door, he sits up.

 

“Are you angry?” he asks.

 

Lea shrugs his shoulders. “I don’t even know how to feel.” He takes a deep breath. “You don’t think we should be together?”

 

“I don’t think you’re safe with me.”

 

“Well, tough shit, because I don’t think you’re safe on your own.”

 

He closes his eyes. “You deserve better than someone like me.”

 

“So, you just wanna give up on us?”

 

“Lea—”

 

“I don’t wanna hear it.” He turns away. “I’m gonna go over to Roxas’s place for a while. Later.” And he leaves.

 

Isa watches the door, waiting for it to open again. Waiting for Lea to come back. Or maybe he should’ve gone after the redhead. Instead, he gets up and heads to the market. After all, he hasn’t eaten all day. So, once he’s back home, he starts prepping and cooking right away. A good couple of hours pass by. By the time Lea returns to the apartment, it’s just about 7:30p. And Isa’s just about finished cooking.

 

Lea steps into the kitchen, sniffing out the scent. “Did you—?”

 

“I made your favourite,” Isa says. “Stroganoff.”

 

“Isa…” He takes a deep breath before stepping up to him, taking his hands in his own. “I need you to stop talking down to yourself. You are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for.”

 

He swallows hard. “Fine. But then you have to tell me if—If my eyes ever turn.”

 

He touches his forehead to Isa’s. “Tell me this isn’t over.”

 

He shakes his head. “No. It’s not over.” Lea pushes ahead and kisses Isa deeply. He kisses back, but only for a moment. “I have to finish cooking,” he says as he pulls away.

 

Lea steps back. “Fine, but only because it smells so good.”

 

Isa smiles sheepishly. “I am sorry.” He breathes deep. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

 

“I’m positive.” He brushes Isa’s hair out of his face. “Just like I’m positive this is a good idea.”

 

“What is?”

 

He smiles. “Us.” Damn it. Isa wants to kiss the redhead again, but he doesn’t. Instead, he turns to focus on finishing the food he’s cooking. Lea chuckles, stepping up behind him and kissing the nape of his neck. “So, if Demyx is right and everyone does know about us, after all, then I guess we don’t have to be so discreet in public anymore.”

 

He rolls his eyes at him. “Everyone allegedly knowing about our relationship does not at all change how I feel about public displays of affection.”

 

“C’mon, I’m not saying you have to let me kiss you in public, but at least let me hold your hand.” He rests his chin on his shoulder. “Let me hold you.”

 

He blushes softly. “Maybe.”

 

Lea smiles against his skin and kisses his cheek. He then leaves Isa alone long enough to allow him to finish cooking. When he does finish, he makes plates for both of them. They sit across from each other at the table and eat in silence. Isa watches Lea as he seemingly enjoys the meal he’s prepared. And once they’ve both finished eating, Lea’s the one who cleans up after them. He washes their plates and Isa continues to watch him.

 

“If there’s something you wanna say,” he starts, “just say it.” He looks over his shoulder at him. “I’m not a mind reader.”

 

Isa rests his chin on his hand. “Well, perhaps you should learn.”

 

He chuckles. “Asshole.”

 

He smiles in response. “Is there anything that could change your mind?”

 

“What? To make me think you’re not an asshole?” He shakes his head. “No, that’s just a given.”

 

He laughs. “Not that.”

 

“Then what?”

 

“Is there anything I can do that would make you turn away from this? From us? Anything that would make you believe it’s no longer worth the time or energy?”

 

He finishes the dishes and grabs a towel to dry his hands. “No. I’ve said it before, nothing can ever come between us. I am always gonna be here for you. I will always—” He stops short, clearing his throat. There’s a hint of red in his cheeks. “There’s nothing you can do that will change my mind. That will change how I see you or how I feel about you. Got it memorised?”

 

Isa tilts his head. “What were you going to say?”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

He gets to his feet and steps up to Lea. He winds his arms around his neck and kisses him deeply. Lea’s arms wrap around his waist as he returns the kiss, pulling their bodies flush together. The kisses are short-lasting but hungry. Full of desire.

 

“What if I wanted to move out of Twilight Town?” Isa asks between kisses.

 

“I’ll follow you anywhere,” Lea says.

 

“Anywhere?”

 

He pulls far enough away to look into his eyes. “I’ll guide you through the darkness if I have to.”

 

Isa’s hand grabs a fistful of red spikes as he dives in for another kiss. Then another. And another. Lea’s hands are roving all over his back and sides and he can feel the heat even through his shirt. When they pull apart again, they’re both breathless. Anticipating more but afraid to venture further. Isa’s grip in Lea’s hair then slackens and Lea almost seems disappointed.

 

“My light in the darkness,” Isa says. He swallows hard. “I love you, Lea.”

 

His breath catches in his throat and the look in his green eyes makes Isa’s heart melt. As does the smile that spreads across his lips. A smile of relief. Bliss. “Isa—” He kisses him, chuckling. “I love you, too, Isa.” Another kiss. “That’s why I’ll never—”

 

“I know.” The redhead’s hands slip beneath Isa’s shirt and he gasps softly at the contact. “I know, Lea.”

 

They continue to stand in the middle of kitchen, just kissing as if nothing else in the world matters. Except nothing else does matter. Not while they’re in each other’s arms. They’re both safe here. They’re both sound. In Lea’s arms, there’s no room for any flashbacks or nightmares or hallucinations. No hooded figures with yellow eyes. Just the two of them, who fit perfectly together. They mold together like pieces of clay. And Lea’s hands know just how to work Isa.

 

He hushes Isa when he starts crying. He doesn’t know why he’s crying now. It’s not like he’s upset or scared. He’s happy. At the same time, though, this is the most intense rush of emotions he’s felt since becoming whole again. It’s a lot to take in. But Lea’s here and he’s comforting him and smiling at him and kissing the outline of his scar. This moment is all he’s ever wanted. Hell, he doesn’t even care anymore that it took over a decade to get here. He’s just happy he made it.

 

Isa came back to Lea.


	14. Coded

Isa takes the next few days to work from home. He keeps himself occupied with reading the articles or reading books or cleaning around the apartment. Anything that will keep his mind from wandering. Hmm. It doesn’t help that Lea is still working overnight shifts at the café, either. Doesn’t help being alone.

 

There’s a knock at the front door. He sets aside the broom in his hand to answer it. Roxas and Xion are standing on the other side.

 

“Good morning,” Xion greets him.

 

“If you come in, you have to be quiet,” Isa says. “Lea is sleeping.”

 

“Yeah, and he can sleep through anything,” Roxas says. “We’re not staying here, though. You’re coming with us.”

 

He cocks an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”

 

Xion giggles. “Axel asked us to get you out of the apartment. He says you need fresh air and sunlight.”

 

“I have windows.”

 

Roxas grins, cocking his head towards the other. “Told you he’d resist.”

 

Xion scoffs before turning back on Isa. “Do you really wanna prove Roxas, right?”

 

“Hey, I resent that.”

 

Isa chuckles at this. “And what exactly are the plans for the day?”

 

She laughs. “There aren’t any plans. The point is to be spontaneous.”

 

“Spontaneity is not my strong suit.”

 

“Neither is leaving your apartment to get fresh air and sunlight,” Roxas says. “But you’re gonna do it anyway.”

 

Isa sighs. He knows he’s not winning this debate. So, he tells them to wait just a moment so he can put away all the cleaning supplies he had taken out. He then returns to the front door and steps outside with them.

 

“Lead the way,” he says.

 

With that, they head out. As they cross the market, Xion stops to do some light shopping. Isa and Roxas follow her around the little shops. She points out trinkets to each of them that remind her of Riku or Naminé or Ventus or any of their other friends. She then ends up purchasing a seashell trinket for Roxas, a flame trinket for Lea, and a star trinket for Isa. They both insist it’s unnecessary, but the girl is quite stubborn.

 

From there, they make their way into Twilight Town. They explore some of the bigger shops. The clothing shops. Xion apparently needs a new hat for when they take trips to the Islands and Roxas shops for a new pair of shoes since his current pair is wearing out. Isa muses over certain articles of clothing, but he’s perfectly content with what he has in his closet already. Although, there are plenty of shirts he can see Lea pulling off. In more ways than one. He blushes to himself at the thought and shakes his head. It still amazes him how he can miss someone he sees every single day.

 

“Isa?” Xion says, bringing him back to reality. She then laughs. “You’re not even paying attention, are you?”

 

“Sorry.” He clears his throat. “Was there a question?”

 

“What do you think of this hat?” She places the white sunhat atop her head. “Is it too big or can I pull it off.”

 

 _Pull it off_. He shakes his head again, holding back another blush. Curse that redhead and his innuendoes. “It looks very nice.”

 

She smiles. “Thank you. Roxas said it should go in the garbage.”

 

“No hat needs to be that large,” Roxas says.

 

Isa chuckles at the two of them. “You two truly do fight like brother and sister.”

 

Her smile widens. “Well, we are, in a sense.” She removes the hat and takes one last look at it. “I’m going for it.” And she brings it to the front to checkout.

 

“You feeling okay?” Roxas then asks Isa.

 

“Hmm?” He shakes his head. “Oh. I’m fine, yes.” He browses through a few more shirts on the rack in front of him. “Did you find a pair of shoes you like?”

 

“Nah, I’ll check out the next shop.” He pauses. “Hey, uhm, is it true about you and Axel? That you two are…y’know…” He shrugs his shoulders. “Dating?”

 

Isa freezes on the spot. “Where did you hear that?”

 

“Demyx said it.” He chuckles. “That’s why Xion and I aren’t so sure if we should believe it or not. Then again, Ven seems to agree. And I think I overheard Naminé and Kairi say something about the two of you.”

 

“I see. So, in other words, no one knows how to mind their own business.” He shakes his head, sighing.

 

“No one has said anything bad about it. If anything, everyone thinks you two would be perfect together.”

 

“And what do you and Xion think? I know how protective you two are of Lea and I know you’re still a bit wary of me.”

 

Roxas scratches the back of his head, laughing nervously. “Well, Axel does seem to bring out the best in you. There’s no denying that.”

 

“What are you guys talking about?” Xion asks as she rejoins them.

 

Roxas’s eyes widen a bit. “N-nothing.”

 

She eyes him peculiarly before her eyes widen and she lets out a small gasp. “You asked about him and Axel. _Ugh_. Roxas, I told you not to do that.”

 

“It’s fine,” Isa says. “Really, I don’t mind.”

 

“Oh.” She swallows hard. “Is it true, then?”

 

He chuckles at them. “I think this is a conversation you two should have with Lea rather than with me. I don’t think he’ll appreciate me being interrogated.”

 

“C’mon, we’re not interrogating you.” Roxas shrugs once again. “We’re just making conversation. Questions between friends.”

 

 _Friends_. The word catches Isa off guard. He’s almost positive this is the first time Roxas has ever referred to him as a friend. He takes a deep breath. “If you must know the answer that badly, then yes, it’s true.” Both their jaws drop as they stare at him with wide eyes. “What? You said you wanted the truth.”

 

“Well, yeah, but Axel kind of already told us,” Roxas goes on. “To be honest, we just didn’t think you’d actually admit it.”

 

“Oh, so this was a test?”

 

“Not really. Like you said, people need to mind their own business. And we know you’re not as open as Axel is, so we were curious as to just how open you’d be with us regarding your relationship with him.”

 

“In other words, Roxas is just being a pain in the ass,” Xion says. She throws her hand up to silence him before he can respond. “Let me guess… You resent that?”

 

Now he pouts, folding his arms across his chest. “Shut up.”

 

Isa laughs more, shaking his head. “Is that his version of _got it memorised_?”

 

“It might as well be.”

 

“All right, I’m leaving.” And he heads out of the shop.

 

“ _Roxas_ ,” Xion calls after him, although she’s laughing even harder. “C’mon, we better go after him.”

 

They catch up with him a few shops down while he’s browsing a couple pairs of shoes through the window. Xion tells him to go in and try them on, but he decides against it. So, they decide to stop for an early lunch instead.

 

“How long ago did Lea tell you?” Isa asks once they’ve ordered their meals.

 

“Not too long ago,” Xion says.

 

“Yeah, it was only just the other day when he came over to my place after you two had that argument,” Roxas goes on. “Which he did not go into details about.”

 

Isa’s gaze drops to the table. “Yes, well—”

 

“You don’t have to talk about it,” Xion tells him. “We’re just glad you two worked things out.” She smiles. “Axel is really happy with you. And it’s clear how happy you are with him, too. How much more relaxed you are.”

 

Now he’s holding back a blush. “Either way, I think it was just caused by the tension of currently being on completely opposite schedules.”

 

“Oh, yeah, that would make sense.”

 

Just then, Isa’s phone goes off. He excuses himself from the table and steps outside before answering it. “Ienzo,” he says. “How are you?”

 

“Quite well, thank you,” Ienzo says. “How about yourself?”

 

“Better. Much better.”

 

“Good. Now, I’m sure you know I’m calling to talk about the results of your second blood tests.”

 

“I figured it would be about that. Do you need me to come to the lab again?”

 

“No, we can talk over the phone. You seem to be more comfortable when you don’t have to be here.” Isa simply nods his head. Ienzo looks over his shoulder. “Demyx, don’t touch that. It is extremely fragile, and it will take the rest of your life for you to be able to pay me back for it.” He shakes his head and focuses back on the call. “My apologies.”

 

“No worries.” He takes a deep breath. “How bad is it?”

 

“Bad?” He laughs. “You’re worrying too much, Isa. Everything is perfectly normal. You still have the DNA marker, yes, but we all do. Nothing else has changed. It’s not like it’s progressed or gotten any worse.”

 

“Then…that episode…”

 

“That’s all it was. A bad episode. It happens with PTSD. It’s to be expected, really.”

 

He shakes his head. “That’s not a good enough response. I don’t want to get violent like that again. How can I prevent that sort of episode from happening?”

 

“There’s no guarantee if it’ll happen again or not. Lea seems to have an excellent handle on you, though. He knows how to snap you out of it.”

 

“What if it’s worse next time?”

 

“Man, you can’t think like that,” Demyx says before appearing on the screen over Ienzo’s shoulder. “Ya gotta make yourself believe you’re stronger than that.”

 

Ienzo pushes him away. “I told you to stay out of this, Dem.”

 

“C’mon, you said as soon as Even left we could—”

 

His cheeks flush bright red. “Stop talking.”

 

Isa chuckles to himself. “If you need to go—”

 

“Ignore him,” he goes on. “Point being, you’re fine, Isa. You’re healthy. You’ll have some bad days, but the absolute worst thing you can do for yourself is push Lea away on those days. You have to let him help you in any way he can. Otherwise, you’ll never get better. And to get better, you have to accept what’s wrong.”

 

He swallows hard. “Thank you, Ienzo.”

 

“Of course. Don’t be afraid to reach out to me, either, if you feel things truly aren’t getting any better.”

 

“I will.”

 

“ _Ienzo_ …” Demyx calls from the background.

 

Ienzo rolls his eyes. “I’m sorry, I have to get going. He’s becoming uncontrollable.”

 

Isa smirks. “You two have a date or something?”

 

His cheeks flush all over again.  “You know, perhaps you’re spending too much time with Lea, after all.”

 

He chuckles. “I’ll talk with you later, Ienzo. Enjoy your date.” And he hangs up. By the time he returns to the table, their food has already been brought out. He reclaims his seat across from the other two. “Sorry about that.”

 

“Who was it?” Xion asks.

 

“Ienzo.”

 

“Everything all right?” Roxas checks.

 

“Yes, everything is fine.” He pauses as he takes the first bite of his meal. “Y’know, I think Ienzo and Demyx might be dating.”

 

Xion lets out a short laugh. “Are you _gossiping_?”

 

“Hold on.” Roxas puts his utensils down. “Demyx and Ienzo? They’re complete and utter opposites. How could they ever make that work?”

 

“Well, they do say opposites attract.”

 

“But this is Demyx and Ienzo we’re talking about.”

 

“All I’m saying,” Isa goes on, “is that Demyx made a comment the other day about how he spends extra time at the lab for the same reason Lea and I moved in together. And he was also just there now when Ienzo called me and Ienzo seemed a bit…flustered by his presence.”

 

“Wow…” Roxas shakes his head. “Were we wrong about the Organisation? Was it really some messed up sort of dating service?” Xion bursts out laughing at this. “What? I feel like I’m not too far off.”

 

Xion’s still laughing. “Who would you date, then?”

 

“None of them. No offence.”

 

“Are you sure?” Isa asks. “I think Dilan and Aeleus are still available.”

 

“St-stop—Stop talking.”

 

Isa continues eating as if nothing is wrong. “Don’t get mad at me when you’re the one who brought up the concept.” He takes another bite. “You thought of it.”

 

Roxas’s face falls into his hands. “And I’ve traumatised myself by doing so.”

 

“Poor thing,” Xion gasps out through fits of laughter.

 

Isa continues watching as Xion tries to calm herself down while Roxas just sulks. He wonders if things were this lively for the two of them and Lea back during their time in the Organisation. If they were, he finally understands exactly why Lea would’ve spent so much of his time with them. They made him feel something again. Something he hadn’t felt in a decade, no thanks to Isa. So, of course, he would’ve grown close to them. Of course he would’ve admired their friendship. His time with them must’ve been the first spark of emotion he had felt since losing his heart. And Isa still had plenty to make up for.

 

Once they finish eating, Isa pays the bill despite Roxas’s and Xion’s protests of splitting it. He refuses. From there, he decides to head home for the day. Luckily, they let him go. And as soon as he steps through the door to the apartment, he gets pushed against the wall and ravaged by Lea.

 

“I’ve missed you,” the redhead says between kisses.

 

“Well, that’s what happens when you ask Roxas and Xion to get me out of the house for a day.”

 

“Yeah, that was a bad idea,” he says right against his lips. They exchange a couple short kisses before Lea starts kissing down Isa’s neck. “You were gone too long.”

 

He smiles and closes his eyes as he wraps his arms around the redhead. The feel of his lips on his neck is delightful. And when his teeth latch on and he begins to suck, Isa can’t suppress the moan that passes his lips. Lea has him by the neck and by the hips. At his full disposal.

 

“Ienzo called me earlier,” he then says, wanting to get past the subject before it slips his mind. And at the rate this is going, he’s surprised he hasn’t already forgotten.

 

Lea stops to look at him. “Do we have to go back?”

 

He shakes his head. “He said everything is fine. No changes whatsoever.”

 

He smiles, cupping Isa’s cheeks. “See? I told you you’d be okay.” He kisses the corner of his mouth. Then his cheek. Jawline. Until he’s back at his neck.  Isa pulls him away ever so slightly. “What’s wrong?”

 

“I need you to promise me something.” He takes a deep breath. “If I ever get violent with you again—”

 

“Stop. Don’t even say it.”

 

“I need you to fight back, Lea,” he goes on anyway. “Don’t just let me hurt you.”

 

“No. I’m not gonna fight you when you’re in that state.”

 

He swallows hard. “It could get so much worse, though.”

 

“It’s only gonna get better.”

 

“That’s not true.”

 

“Fine. Then we’ll fight it together, but I will not pit myself against you.” He strokes along his jawline, his touch soft. “I suffered through a decade of that already. I’m not suffering another day.”

 

Isa meets his gaze before grabbing a fistful of his shirt and pulling him for another kiss. Lea gladly reciprocates, returning his hands to Isa’s hips and squeezing gently. He gasps into the kiss and Lea smirks in response. He then returns to Isa’s neck as his hands trail up the front of his shirt until they reach the zipper. Lea’s lithe fingers pull it down until it comes undone completely. He then places his hands upon Isa’s chest.

 

“You’re cold,” he says.

 

Isa relishes in the touch. “No. You’re just insufferably warm.”

 

He chuckles against his skin, taking it between his teeth again. The mix of the stinging on his neck and gentleness of Lea’s hands on his chest causes Isa to groan. The sensation is overwhelming, and he only wants more of it. More of Lea.

 

When the redhead releases the patch of skin from his teeth, he pulls away and traces his thumb over it, smirking. “Good thing you wear those high collars.”

 

Isa wants to roll his eyes, but a blush betrays him, spreading across his cheeks. He then pushes Lea back until the back of his knees hit the armrest of sofa and he buckles over, falling on top of it. Isa shrugs his shirt the rest of way off and Lea is watching him with those green eyes. Hungry for more. He crawls over Lea, who automatically reaches for him, touching whichever part of Isa’s body his hands can get to first.

 

“How much time do you have?” Isa asks.

 

“Enough.” His voice is breathless, and it causes Isa’s heart to skip a beat. He leans down and sucks at Lea’s jawline. “Shit… I can’t wait for our week off.” He moans as Isa shifts to his collarbone. “I will not be letting any part of you out of my sight.”

 

Isa chuckles low in the back of his throat. “We should tell everyone we’re going away for the week, but then just stay here.”

 

“I don’t care where I am, so long as I get to be with you.”

 

“Who’s the sap now?”

 

“Still you.”

 

Isa smirks, pressing one last hard kiss to Lea’s parted lips before pushing himself up to a sitting position, straddling the redhead. He unbuttons his shirt, Lea sitting up to shrug it and his vest off all at once before wrapping his arms around Isa, bringing their lips and bared chests together. They each know exactly what to do to make the other tick. To make them melt beneath their fingertips. They know how to respond to every moan and gasp and whine and every twitch of movement. They have each other completely memorised. As if knowing is in their DNA. A part of who they are.

 

Once they’ve both come down from their high, Lea decides to take a shower. While he’s in there, Isa prepares a quick meal for him to eat before having to go into work. And when Lea’s out, he comes into the kitchen with nothing except a towel tied around his waist. Hell, he’s not even fully dried off yet.

 

“You’re going to ruin my floors,” Isa tells him.

 

“C’mon, that’s all you have to say?”

 

His gaze flickers down to the multiple scars across the redhead’s chest. The shirt and vest he always dons are just high enough to cover them all. Not that Lea is ashamed of these scars. He wears a bathing suit no problem, after all. No one has ever questioned him. Commented on them. Almost as if it’s normal for him to have them. As if he was born with them.

 

“Isa?”

 

He shakes his head and brings his gaze back up to those green eyes. “Sorry. Lost my train of thought…”

 

Lea steps up to him and wraps his arms around Isa’s waist. In return, Isa traces the scars along his chest. Lea doesn’t seem to mind. Just hums softly in approval, closing his eyes. Isa closes the distance between them to place the softest of kisses against his lips. Far too chaste in comparison to how they had just been treating one another barely a half an hour earlier. That’s one of the many things Isa adores about their relationship, though. One of the many things he adores about the redhead. He’s sentimental, but he still knows when to be rough.

 

“I love you,” Lea says once the kiss breaks. It’s barely audible. If Isa hadn’t been only an inch away from him, he probably wouldn’t have even heard it. He then cups Isa’s cheek. “Don’t ever forget that.”

 

“I won’t.” He smiles softly. “I got it memorised.”

 

He returns the smile. “Good.”

 

Once Lea’s finished eating, he gets dressed and leaves for his overnight shift. Isa lets out a heavy sigh as soon as he’s gone. It’s still pretty early. Barely 6:30p. He washes the dishes and leaves the apartment, heading for the hilltop. When he gets there, he takes a seat on the bench, arriving just in time for the sunset. It’s not as colourful or vibrant as it typically is, but he doesn’t mind. He’ll take dull over numb.

 

After the sun has disappeared, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out the charm Xion had purchased for him that afternoon. There’s not much to it—just a simple star—but Isa somehow already feels far too attached to it. He holds it up against the darkened sky and compares it to the rest of the stars. He then chuckles to himself. What a childish thing to do. He keeps holding up the trinket, though. He pulls his phone out and lines the charm up with the moon so it’s resting beside it. He snaps a photo before pocketing the trinket. He shakes his head as he reviews the picture, chuckling under his breath again. Then he puts his phone away, too, and turns his attention to the moon. Big and bright and _round_. Not heart-shaped. It’s not some strange gateway. It’s just the normal moon… And it’s so much better.

 

Soon enough, he returns to the apartment. When he steps inside, he takes a deep breath. He’s filled with the overwhelming scent of… _something_. Of Lea, perhaps. Tch. Does that even make any sense? He’s not so sure. All he knows is that it’s comforting. Hospitable. He can spend the rest of his existence being greeted just by this scent. The scent of coming home.

 

He checks the time. 9:06p. He can’t believe he was gone for that long. It hadn’t felt like it. He heads into the kitchen and starts to brew a pot of coffee. While it’s brewing, he decides to take a quick shower. And when he’s out, he looks in the mirror. He gazes straight into his reflection’s eyes. Straight at the scar. He takes in everything that once represented _Saïx_ and now represents Isa. His body may not have changed when he reformed, but he still did. Every single one of his emotions are real now. His contentment. His anger. His fear. His love. There’s no faking any of it. Hell, _Saïx_ couldn’t even fake them. Isa is better. He’s real. And he’s fighting for a better cause. He’s fighting for himself. And he finally knows he can say that without sounding selfish because he has Lea fighting for him, too.

 

They’re in this together.


	15. Time Off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I only have one update left after this chapter...like, I can't believe it's already been almost four months since I initially uploaded it x.x I absolutely loved writing this story and I've just as much loved sharing it and enjoying it with y'all so far :3 Thank you so much for taking your time to read and comment; it means the world to me <3  
> Well, here we go. Second to last.

It’s the grand reopening of the newly renovated café. Soon enough, Lea and Isa would have a week and a half to themselves. Before they can get there, though, Lea has to work the rest of the week to get through the rush of new business. Isa doesn’t mind, especially since he reverts to editing all his articles there in the café. But only during Lea’s shifts, of course.

 

“What do ya think?” Lea asks the day after the grand reopening.

 

Isa shrugs his shoulders. “Honestly, it doesn’t seem like much has changed.”

 

“Are you kidding?” Xion says, laughing. “It’s an entirely different colour scheme. I mean, this is…” And she goes off on the different areas and how the colours have changed from this to that and that to this. It’s simple, yet Isa doesn’t understand half of what’s coming out of her mouth. Her excitement is intriguing enough, though. “So, yes, a lot has actually changed,” she finishes. “How did you not pick up on that?”

 

“I suppose I don’t have such a keen eye for décor.”

 

She brings her shoulders up as she tucks in her chin, slouching in her seat as if she’s trying to form a shell with her body. “Don’t tease.”

 

“The walls are kinda bare,” Roxas speaks up. “Good thing the place isn’t white or else I’d be having some serious flashbacks.” He pauses and cringes a bit, squeezing his eyes shut, not even needing to see the look Lea shot him. “Sorry. That was a bad joke.”

 

“No worries,” Isa says. “I know what you mean.”

 

“Yeah, well, the boss wants to decorate the place with art from local photographers and painters and whatnot. I dunno. I think just throw a couple random pictures up. No one’s even gonna give a shit or pay any attention.”

 

“Oh, really?” a female voice says before appearing beside Lea. “Please, tell me how you truly feel.”

 

Lea chuckles nervously, scratching the back of his head. “Sorry, Boss.”

 

“Are these your friends?” she then asks.

 

“Uh…yeah.” He clears his throat. “This is Isa, Roxas, and Xion.”

 

“So, you’re Isa, huh?” She smiles wide. “It’s nice to finally meet you. Axel talks about you all the time.”

 

Lea’s face turns as bright as his hair. “Shut up. I do not.”

 

Xion giggles. “Awe, that’s so sweet.”

 

“Except she’s exaggerating.”

 

“Man, never thought of you as the hopeless romantic type,” Roxas says.

 

Isa’s far too busy repressing a blush of his own as the others continue to tease the redhead mercilessly. The noise grows overwhelming, though, bouncing around and echoing in his mind. He snaps his binder of articles shut, causing silence amongst the others almost immediately.

 

“My apologies,” he speaks up. He clears his throat. “I just got a headache out of nowhere, so I will be returning home.”

 

“C’mon, Axel’s shift only ends in, like, an hour,” Roxas says as Isa gathers his belongings and gets to his feet. “You can’t wait that long?”

 

“He’s not required to wait,” Lea says. He looks at Isa and smiles. “I’ll see you when I get home.”

 

Isa nods his head once. “It was nice meeting you, as well,” he says to Lea’s boss. Then he takes his leave. But it’s not long before Lea is at his side. “What are you doing—?”

 

“Boss let me go early,” he tells him. “I don’t get into details, but she understands that you have…bad days. She also wanted to apologise.”

 

“She didn’t do anything wrong.”

 

“She feels at fault for that whole thing starting and overwhelming you.” He links his arm with Isa’s and smiles. “Unless you want some time to yourself, my schedule has freed up for the day.”

 

“You only had an hour left, you didn’t have to—”

 

“Which is exactly why it’s no big deal that I left early. Besides, two more days and we’ll be on our mini-vacation.”

 

“Have we decided where we’re going yet?”

 

“Well, I liked your idea of telling everyone we’re going away, but then staying home, but I may have promised Kairi we’d spend some time at the Islands.”

 

Isa chuckles. “That’s fine with me.”

 

“We only have to go for a few days. Then we can come home and shut everyone out for the rest of the week.”

 

“Relax, Lea, it’s fine.”

 

He smiles. “Okay.” He pauses. “Maybe we can sneak to the Old Mansion and spend some time there. At least no one would know to find us there.”

 

He shakes his head. “It’s too connected to the Organisation.”

 

“C’mon, we talked about this. You can’t just ignore every little thing that had to do with the Organisation. Besides,” he smirks, “we could make some new memories there.”

 

Now he rolls his eyes at the redhead. “You’re ridiculous.”

 

“Why? Because I wanna make memories?”

 

“It’s the kind of memories you want to make that make you ridiculous. And you should keep in mind that children still go to the mansion to explore it.”

 

“No one ever goes inside. Plus, they check it out because they think the place is haunted. So, a few ghostly moans won’t scar them for life if they don’t know it’s really some guy getting—”

 

“ _Lea_.”

 

“You might not want to say my name. That could end up giving us away.” The stern look on Isa’s face only makes the redhead laugh. “Okay, all right, fine. No mansion.” He calms himself down a bit. “Y’know, you’re not nearly as intimidating as you used to be.”

 

“Hmm. What a shame.”

 

He laughs even more. “Sure are a pain in the ass, though.”

 

He smirks. “You ask for it.”

 

Lea opens his mouth to retort, but nothing comes out. Then he just shakes his head as Isa laughs. “Guess I set myself up for that one.”

 

The rest of the way home is filled with small laughs and idle chatter. Isa can’t remember the last time he spoke so much. He’s so used to always just being in the background and listening. Being a part of the conversation is almost an entirely different world. Or maybe it’s just because of the fact that it’s Lea he’s talking with. The one person he’s always been the most comfortable around. The one person he’s always been able to be himself around. No holding back. No hiding.

 

Their time spent at home isn’t any different. Rarely a silent moment. Even when Isa is in the midst of reading, he puts the book down for Lea. For conversation. And the best part of it all is that he can tell how happy it’s making Lea. Not just the attention he’s receiving, but the fact that Isa is opening up. And it’s becoming more natural. That, along with other daily things. Isa’s feeling better in general. Sleep is coming easier to him. And nightmares less.

 

Speaking of sleep…

 

Before they know it, the two days have passed and their time off has begun. They each pack a suitcase and say goodbye to Roxas and Xion before boarding the train to Destiny Islands. The ride is quiet, but this time it’s Isa resting his head on Lea’s shoulder and Lea seems more than ecstatic by this small gesture. He also seems to be loving the fact that he’s able to hold Isa’s hand and mindlessly play with his hair. Isa loves it, too. So much so that, when Lea stops, Isa coaxes him into continuing to play with it. Lea smiles and kisses his head.

 

When they arrive at the Islands, Kairi and Naminé are waiting for them at the station. They greet them excitedly, bringing Lea and Isa back to their place. They were originally going to just drop their bags off, but the four of them decide to stay in for the rest of the evening. Isa makes dinner and they sit around the floor in the living room, chatting while they eat. They talk about the past, the present, and future. Kairi and Naminé talk about school. Lea and Isa talk about work, but that topic doesn’t last long before the girls cut them off. _No work-talk while on vacation_. It’s more of a warning than it is just a friendly suggestion.

 

Soon enough, it’s past midnight. The girls clean up their emptied dishes while they give Lea and Isa permission to turn in for the night. Isa’s exhausted, so he knows it won’t take long for him to fall asleep. Especially with Lea sleeping next to him.

 

Isa wakes up before any of the others that morning. He slips out of bed, being careful as to not disturb Lea. He makes his way for the kitchen and, first and foremost, starts a pot of coffee. He then starts on a batch of pancakes. It’s not long before Kairi’s joining him.

 

“You really enjoy cooking, huh?” she greets him.

 

He smiles. “Good morning.”

 

She leans against the counter, reaching into the bowl to spoon some of the pancake batter with her finger. “I’m not complaining,” she goes on. She licks the batter. “You’re good at it.”

 

“If I didn’t cook, I’m not sure Lea would eat on a regular basis.”

 

She nods. “Yeah, I get that.” The coffee finishes brewing, and she grabs a mug to pour a cup, handing it over to Isa. “He can be a little out there sometimes, huh?”

 

“He certainly can be. He’s always been that way.”

 

“But you keep him grounded.”

 

“I suppose so.”

 

“Yet, he lifts you up at the same time.” She smiles. “It’s a good balance.”

 

“Sun and moon.”

 

She smiles. “That’s a really good point. I never even thought of that.”

 

He takes a sip of the coffee as he flips the first batch of pancakes onto a plate. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, so…” He shrugs his shoulders. “I’ve always been a thinker.”

 

“Nothing wrong with that.”

 

Naminé wakes up next, followed by Lea. They all eat, and Lea and Isa drink through the pot of coffee. Once they clean up in the kitchen, they make their way for the beach. They spend some time just hanging out before hitting the water. They splash around for a while, and then head back to land for a two-on-two volleyball game: Lea and Naminé versus Isa and Kairi. A game which is won by Isa and Kairi, leaving Lea defeated in the sand once more.

 

“What can I say?” Kairi starts. “You just can’t beat me.”

 

“He can’t beat anyone,” Isa says. “He fought Ven when they first met and he lost that so-called battle, as well.”

 

“Thanks for the support, babe,” Lea says.

 

He cocks an eyebrow. “Babe?”

 

That’s when Lea sits up and smirks. “What? Not into pet names?”

 

Naminé giggles. “I find it kinda cute.”

 

Isa holds back a blush. “There’s nothing cute about it.”

 

Lea laughs, jumping back to his feet. “Fine. No pet names. I’ll just be boring and use your actual name.”

 

He rolls his eyes. “You’re impossible.”

 

He grins. “You love me for it.”

 

“Don’t flatter yourself.”

 

Kairi laughs. “You two really are so good for each other.” She pauses. “This is out in the open now, right? Like, everyone knows?”

 

“Yeah, Demyx kinda outed us, in a sense,” Lea says.

 

“Don’t worry. I’m almost positive he and Ienzo are dating,” Isa tells them. They all stop and stare at him. “What?”

 

“Whoa, whoa, hold up.” Lea shakes his head. “How do you have this info and why the hell have you been holding out on us?”

 

“When Ienzo called me the other day to follow-up on our last visit, Demyx was there. It seemed they had been getting ready to go out together before Ienzo called me. Ienzo also seemed quite flustered by Demyx’s behaviour and choice of words.”

 

“ _Hah_. Holy shit…”

 

“I can see them working,” Naminé says. “I mean, they’re kinda like you two. The kind of opposites that balance each other out.”

 

“Yeah, I think Demyx is the kind of person Ienzo needs to bring him out of his shell a bit more,” Kairi says with a nod of her head. “And Ienzo is the exact kind of person Demyx needs for…everything else.”

 

Lea chuckles. “No kidding.”

 

“You’re one to talk,” Isa speaks up.

 

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

 

The corners of his lips curve upwards ever so slightly. “All it means is that you’re a bit of a handful yourself.”

 

“You’re comparing me to Demyx? Tch. At least I’m not as lazy as he is. I got my shit done and reports turned in.”

 

“Barely. You don’t even know how many reports I faked for you because you didn’t turn them in on time.”

 

Lea pauses. “You faked mission reports for me?”

 

Isa swallows hard. “That’s beside the point.”

 

He grins. “Fine.” He turns to the others. “You guys wanna call it a day?”

 

“What? You mean you don’t wanna stay and watch the sunset?” Kairi says.

 

“Nah, think I’m pretty beat.”

 

She reaches out to him, placing her palm on his forehead, followed by the back of her hand. “Huh. I’d say you’re feeling warmer than average, but I think that’s just how your body runs.”

 

He swats her hand away from him. “Ha, ha, you’re hilarious.” He makes his way for the docks. “C’mon, let’s head back.”

 

They do head back. Except Kairi and Naminé don’t let Isa cook. They decide to order out instead, the girls leaving to pick up the food. Once they’ve returned, the four of them find themselves seated around the living room again. Except tonight, they’re not up late. They all turn in by 10:30, exhausted from the long day. Isa sleeps easy again, but he’s woken up around two o’clock in the morning. He’s careful about getting out of bed, not wanting to wake Lea, and makes his way for the kitchen where he finds Naminé sitting at the table with a glass of water.

 

“Did I wake you?” she asks.

 

“It’s fine,” he says as he sits across from her. “Are you all right?”

 

She nods. “Just a bad dream.”

 

“Still have them?”

 

“From time to time. But they’re never about any of the Organisation members. Not even Marluxia or Larxene. Although, Larxene is really the only one who ever physically hurt me.” She takes a deep breath. “Still, the nightmares are only ever about Castle Oblivion itself. Being trapped there. Locked in a cage.”

 

“They’re just dreams.”

 

She smiles sheepishly. “No, I know. Uhm…this might sound strange, but I actually use the nightmares as inspiration for my drawings. Turn them into something tangible and try to find the light in them.”

 

“Huh.” He takes this into consideration. “That’s not a bad idea.”

 

“It’s a really good outlet. You should try it sometime. Maybe not drawing, but…hmm…” She thinks for a moment. “Well, you have a hard time talking out your feelings still, yeah? So maybe you could try writing them down instead. Y’know, whenever you have a bad dream, write it down. Turn it into a story. It’ll make it seem less real. Less intense.”

 

“Perhaps I will try that.”

 

“I promise, it’ll make a difference.”

 

Just then, Lea enters the kitchen, scratching the back of his head. “What are you two doing up?”

 

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did we wake you?” Naminé asks.

 

“I noticed Isa was gone.”

 

“I heard Naminé get up and wanted to check on her,” Isa says.

 

He becomes more alert at that statement. “Everything okay?”

 

“Yes, I’m fine.” She smiles. “Just had a bad dream. I am going to go back to bed, though.” She reaches across the table for Isa’s hand. “Thank you.” She then gets up and places the empty glass in the sink. “Goodnight, boys.” And she leaves to return to her room.

 

Lea steps up to Isa as he gets to his feet as well, wrapping his arms around his waist. He places the softest of kisses on his lips. “Look at you,” he speaks up, “helping others now and talking them through their own problems.”

 

Isa feels heat rise in his cheeks and he hopes the redhead can’t tell through the darkness. “Well, I do understand where she’s coming from.”

 

“Do you wanna get back to bed, too? Or would you rather take a midnight stroll around the island?”

 

“A midnight stroll sounds divine.”

 

He chuckles. “Dork.”

 

With that, they take their leave. It’s the perfect temperature out. Just comfortable enough for a walk. Lea takes Isa’s hand in his and they walk in silence. Isa’s gaze is caught on the sky. The moon and stars. They’ll always be more entrancing to him than the sunset. He’s sure Lea knows this by now, too.

 

“I know I’ve said this before,” Lea soon speaks up, “but you’ve come a long way, Isa.” He gently squeezes his hand and smiles. “I’m proud of you.”

 

“We’ve both come a long a way. I still have a lot to make up for, though.”

 

“Stop saying that.”

 

“I have a decade of—”

 

“It doesn’t matter. That doesn’t mean you have to take the next decade to rectify all your mistakes. That wouldn’t be fair. You need to learn to just let it go and move on. You’ve done enough. You’ve been forgiven. You’ve been accepted. Take that as a win and forget the rest.”

 

“Forget the rest?”

 

“Yes. The past doesn’t have a hold on us anymore. There’s no part of us that belongs to the Organisation or to Xemnas or Xehanort anymore. We are our own people with our own hearts.” He smiles again. “We are _Somebodies_ , Isa.”

 

He stops short but doesn’t release the redhead’s hand. Instead, he gently tugs at it, pulling Lea into him and kissing him deeply. Lea gladly reciprocates the action, kissing back with just as much passion, his free hand gripping Isa’s waist.

 

“Do you feel that?” Lea asks when they break apart. “We feel that because we fought for that emotion. We fought to be here.” He cups Isa’s cheeks before smoothing his hair back. “I wasn’t fighting against you during that last battle, I was fighting for you. For us. Now we’re here. And, damn it, we deserve these lives. These existences. The sooner you realise that—”

 

He doesn’t get the chance to finish his thought. Isa recaptures his lips in another searing kiss. Lea doesn’t seem to mind, especially when Isa brings his free hand up to take a fistful of his hair. And they remain like that for a while. Standing in the middle of some random pathway in the middle of the night, kissing like it’s nobody’s business. And it isn’t. It’s no one’s business but their own. How they feel is no one’s business except their own.

 

Soon enough, they continue their walk around the island. Next thing they know, the sun is peaking over the horizon. They admire it for a long moment before stopping by the local café and ordering two coffees, a hot cocoa, and a tea. They then head back to the girls’ place. When they arrive, they make themselves comfortable in the kitchen. It’s not much longer until Kairi and Naminé both wake up. Kairi takes the hot cocoa and Naminé takes the tea and the four of them sit at the table in comfortable silence. It’s not until the sun has fully risen that they decide to get ready for the day ahead of them.

 

It’s the most unorganised day of their lives. Each of them wants to do something different, which results in Lea and Kairi heading to the beach to challenge each other on the obstacle course, while Isa and Naminé do some shopping around the main Island. Except this includes Naminé hijacking Isa’s phone and taking multiple pictures of both of them throughout the day, whether Isa’s ready for the picture or not. Naminé assures him that they’re all flattering, but then refuses to let him see any of the images, which isn’t really reassuring at all.

 

They meet up with Lea and Kairi on the beach just in time for the sunset. The four of them gather at the paopu tree to watch in awe. There’s something about the way the colours reflect off the ocean… It reminds Isa of—Of his fiery redhead. That’s right. _His_ redhead. His best friend. His partner. His light in the darkness.

 

That night is the last night they spend on the Islands for the week. The following morning, they return to Twilight Town. And as soon as they step into their apartment and close the door behind them, Lea is at Isa’s throat. In the best way. Isa keenly welcomes the attention he’s been missing for the last few days. The attention he’s been craving. Lea’s attention to detail. To every little twitch and catch of breath. To the way Isa moves beneath his fingers. The way he complies.

 

They stumble their way to the bedroom—Isa had moved into Lea’s room once things got more serious between them—leaving a trail of their clothes from doorway to doorway. Isa lifts Lea ever so slightly to lay him down on the bed. He then begins to kiss down the redhead’s neck and he eagerly tilts his head back to give Isa more room. Better access. Isa graciously accepts, finding a particular spot right beneath Lea’s jawline and sucking hard, causing him to gasp. He smirks against his skin. Every breath that passes those sly lips is intoxicating. It’s addictive, but Isa doesn’t want to get clean. He wants Lea, and he’ll take whatever part of him he can have. Lucky for him, Lea’s willing to give all of himself and more to Isa. Although, Isa is willing to do the same.

 

The way Lea holds onto Isa while they’re coming down from their high is almost as good as the climax itself. He holds onto him so desperately, almost as if they’ll both fall away into nothingness if he were to let go. Not that Isa wants him to let go. He is so perfectly content with laying his head upon Lea’s chest and listening to his heartbeat. Feeling his own heart beat in sync with the redhead’s.

 

“And we have a whole other six days of this,” Lea soon speaks up. He kisses the top of Isa’s head. “I never wanna move again. Seriously. I could spend the rest of my life right here in this bed.”

 

Isa chuckles softly. “That’s because you’re lazy.”

 

“Shut up. I am not that lazy.”

 

“If you say so.”

 

“I do say so.”

 

He only smiles and places a soft kiss in the middle of Lea’s chest. He then rests his chin on it to look up at those green eyes. Lea runs his fingers through Isa’s hair, and he closes his eyes, leaning into the touch.

 

“You have no idea how much I love you,” Lea says, his voice soft.

 

“I have some semblance of an idea,” Isa says.

 

“How much do you love me?”

 

It’s not an unreasonable thing for the redhead to ask. Sure, Isa is the one who said it first, but Lea says it far more often. He never says it to hear the other say it back, but Isa knows there are days when he still needs to hear it. Even if he already knows it. Lea needs the affection just as much.

 

Isa opens his eyes again to meet that twinkling green-eyed gaze. He blushes softly. “To the moon and back.”

 

He smiles. Then his eyes widen. “Oh, shit, that reminds me.” He strokes his cheek. “Sorry, babe, but I gotta get up.” He lets the pet name slide—this time—and shifts just enough to allow Lea to get out of bed. He wraps the discarded sheet around himself and leaves the room. Isa watches the door, waiting maybe too eagerly. When Lea finally returns, Isa sits up as he’s rejoined on the bed. Lea then holds out a small box for him. “I got this for you. I mean, I did say I was gonna get you something nice with that tip you left me.”

 

Isa tilts his head in confusion, trying to think of what he could be referring to. Then it hits him. “At the bistro? Lea, that was—”

 

“Yeah, I know, I know, I slacked on the timing and it took me forever to get it, but…” He shrugs his shoulders. “I kept good on my promise, either way.”

 

Another pause. “What is it?”

 

He rolls his eyes. “Open it and you’ll find out.”

 

And Isa does just that, carefully undoing the little bow that’s tied around the small box. He pops it open to reveal a pair of earrings. One is crescent-shaped and the other is star-shaped. “These are—”

 

“Ugh. It’s stupid, right?” Lea shakes his head. “Damn it. I knew it was a bad idea. I knew I should’ve gone with something simpler or something that wasn’t jewelry because—”

 

“Shut up for a second.” He takes a deep breath but doesn’t take his eyes off the earrings. “Why get me these?”

 

“Well, you’re still wearing the pair you had when we were part of the Organisation.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Guess I figured you might appreciate a new pair that had no ties to that decade. But it’s totally okay if you don’t like them. I get it. I can return them.”

 

“Shut up,” he says again. He finally looks up at the redhead. “How much did you spend on these?”

 

“Tch. Is that what you’re worried about?” Now he laughs. “First of all, that’s none of your damn business. Second of all, you’re worth the cost.”

 

“One tip from me didn’t cover the cost of these.”

 

“How do you know?” Isa cocks an eyebrow at him, and Lea lets out a small sigh. “Okay, fine, so it may have taken a good few night’s worth of tips. So what?” He pauses, biting his bottom lip almost nervously. “So…you like them?”

 

He smiles. “Yes, Lea, of course.” He starts pulling the silver studs out of his ears. “Besides, you’re right. It is time to retire these things. They’re boring and, like you said, were only worn during a period of time that wasn’t good to either of us.” The crescent-shaped stud goes into his left ear and the star-shaped stud goes into his right ear. “Perfect fit.”

 

Lea reaches out to trace the shell of one of his _rounded_ ears. “I’m glad.” His fingers trace his jawline until they reach his chin, cupping it. He smirks. “They look pretty hot.”

 

That’s all Isa needs to hear. He closes the distance between them, capturing Lea’s lips in a rough kiss. He pulls the sheet away, tossing it back to the floor as he pushes the redhead onto his back.

 

“Already?” Lea says right against his ear.

 

“You drive me crazy,” Isa tells him, his voice low, “in the best and worst ways.”

 

Now he nips at his ear. “Good.”

 

It is good. It’s better than good. The rush of emotions Isa gets from Lea is exactly what he needs. Exactly what he’s been missing. Sure, that goes without saying, really, but it’s so much better now than when he first reformed. The intensity is more meaningful. It’s all Isa wants. He wants to feel everything. From anger to bliss to fear to love to hate to lust. He wants to experience it all. And he wants to experience it with Lea. Hell, the fact that he gets to experience it with Lea—the infuriating, maddening, caring, sentimental brat he grew up with—makes it all the more worthwhile. It makes it less terrifying. Because when he’s with Lea, he feels as if nothing can go wrong. And maybe that’s not true, but it’s still a good feeling. It’s a sense of security.

 

Despite the last decade, Lea has never given up on Isa. Not once. He has never turned his back on him. That means everything to Isa. And he’ll do anything now to make that up to him. He’ll fight his hardest battle. No matter how dark it gets. So long as the redhead is at Isa’s side and he can see those—vibrant and validating—green eyes, he knows he’ll come out on top.

 

He’ll win this war.


	16. A Life Worth Living

There’s something quite mundane about a normal lifestyle. About working eight hours a day and coming home and eating dinner and sleeping and doing it all over again the next day. At least, that seems to be how Roxas and Xion and their schoolfriends feel. To Isa, though, it’s quite exhilarating. And relieving. There’s nothing wrong with routine. Or with knowing how the day is going to go.

 

If anything, it’s the surprises that Isa hates.

 

He always wakes up first. That’s okay. Lea’s always been a heavy sleeper and has never been an early riser. Not even the Organisation changed that. So, Isa wakes up first. And he heads into the kitchen to brew a pot of coffee. He then sits at the table while he waits. Some mornings he’ll read. Other mornings, he’ll do as Naminé recommended and write. He’s come to find it is indeed a releasing habit. A good hobby.

 

By the time the coffee is done brewing, Lea is always awake. The redhead pours two cups, always handing Isa his cup first before sitting down with his own. It’s their routine. And it’s comfortable and familiar and Isa wouldn’t change it for the world.

 

“Are you working from home today or going into the office?” Lea asks as he gets up to pour his second cup of coffee.

 

“I’m going in today,” Isa says. “I have a few edits to turn in.”

 

He leans against the counter. “Don’t you wanna do more than just editing articles? I know you’re good at it and all, but isn’t it kinda boring? I mean, it must get repetitive.”

 

He shrugs his shoulders. “I have no issue with repetition.”

 

“It’s not tedious?”

 

“Not to me.”

 

He chuckles. “You sure are something, babe.”

 

Another time Isa lets the pet name slide. He’s been letting it slide more and more often now. He gets up and joins the redhead by the coffee pot. “What about you?”

 

“I, unfortunately, do not have the option to work from home.”

 

He rolls his eyes. “You know what I meant.”

 

“I just so happen to have today off,” he goes on. “So, it’s a shame, really, that you’re going into work today.” He smirks. “You should hurry home.”

 

“Or I can keep you waiting.” He steps up to Lea, closing the distance between them until they’re only a breath apart. “That sounds like much more fun.” He barely brushes his lips against Lea’s. “Doesn’t it?” And he walks away.

 

“ _Tease_ ,” the redhead calls after him once Isa turns the corner.

 

He chuckles at the thought of the delay. He then makes his way back to their bedroom to get ready for the day ahead of him. As he exits the room, though, Lea comes around the corner from the bathroom and pushes him against the doorframe, pressing their bodies together.

 

“You should stay home today,” Lea says.

 

“We talked about this already.”

 

He brings his lips to Isa’s. “Let’s talk about it again.” He nips at his bottom lip. “So, then I can change your mind.”

 

Isa brings both hands up—ghosting them over Lea’s sides—to tangle them in Lea’s mass of spikes, gripping and tugging as he kisses him hard. Lea makes a pleasant sound into the kiss as he squeezes at Isa’s hips. Isa swallows his moan and tugs at Lea’s hair more firmly, causing him to groan loudly. Unabashedly. Isa loves that Lea has no shame in the sounds he makes. He doesn’t hold back, and it drives Isa wild. Every single sound that passes those lips only ever makes him want more.

 

“Change your mind yet?” Lea asks, breathless, once he breaks away.

 

Isa doesn’t say anything back. Just smirks and recaptures his lips, which Lea seems quite content with. But…then there’s that annoying ringing sound. Lea pulls away again with a chuckle, resting his forehead against Isa’s.

 

“Impeccable timing,” Isa speaks up.

 

“Think it could be important?” Lea goes on.

 

“Isn’t there always that chance?”

 

“Damn it…”

 

He breathes deep and pushes himself off the doorframe and away from Isa. He rounds the corner back into the kitchen to search for his phone. Isa takes this opportunity to slip into the bathroom and finish getting ready. When he comes out, he can hear Kairi’s rushed speaking coming from the kitchen. He can’t tell if she sounds panicked or excited or what, though.

 

“Kairi, hey, ya gotta calm down,” Lea says as Isa enters the kitchen. “I can’t understand a word you’re saying right now.”

 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Isa gets a view of the screen as she’s taking a deep breath, her eyes closed. Once she opens them again, she smiles. “Hi, Isa.”

 

He returns a small smile. “Hello, Kairi.”

 

“Hey, focus,” Lea says. “What is going on?”

 

Her smile widens even more, and then there are tears streaming down her cheeks. “Riku’s home.”

 

Getting to the Islands is a blur. A rush of colours and unprocessed words. Isa can barely remember boarding the train. He doesn’t remember getting off it, either. All he knows is that he’s standing on the docks while everyone else—Lea, Roxas, Xion, Kairi, Naminé, Ventus, Aqua, Terra—is standing in the centre of the beach, swarming and surrounding _Sora_. He’s home. Riku’s challenge is over. He somehow successfully brought him back. Although…he’s also standing off on his own by the paopu tree. Isa works his way around the mob to join him.

 

“You did it,” he announces his presence.

 

Riku glances over his shoulder. “Yeah. Crazy, isn’t it?”

 

“He seems pretty okay.”

 

“He’s his same old self. No surprise there.” He takes a deep breath. “Why aren’t you part of the celebrations?”

 

“I could ask you the same thing?”

 

He chuckles. “Fair enough.”

 

He watches Riku for a moment. Observes his posture and the way he’s standing with his arms folded across his chest. “Something on your mind?”

 

“Not really. Just thinking about how many times I’ve almost lost Sora now.” He pauses. “I’m not sure if you recall, but remember with the dream sequences how Sora almost fell to the darkness?”

 

“Yes. It had been Xehanort’s plan to turn him into one of the thirteen vessels.”

 

“Right. Well…” Another pause. Another deep breath. “If I wasn’t able—If I hadn’t gotten to him when I did this time around, I fear he would’ve ended up falling to the darkness permanently.”

 

“But he didn’t. And if anyone would be able to bring him back, it’d be you.”

 

He nods his head. “I mean, you came back, right? And, no offence, but—”

 

“I was far gone, yes,” Isa finishes for him. “It’s fine.”

 

“How did you find your way back?”

 

A tint of pink covers his cheeks. “There was a part of me that wouldn’t let go of Lea. All those years in the Organisation destroyed who I had been before and I thought they had destroyed my relationship with Lea, as well, but—Well, my memories were never ruined. Tainted, perhaps, but never wrecked. So, after the final battle, there was a subconscious part of me that had awakened and…” He shrugs his shoulders. “Well, here I am.”

 

There’s another uproar from the group behind them. Isa and Riku both turn to see that Demyx and Ienzo had arrived.

 

“Sora has always been my light in the darkness, too,” Riku says once the commotion dies down. “He never gave up on me, either. So, after being possessed by Ansem, whenever I was afraid that I was losing my way again, I thought of him and he set me back on the right path. The way to dawn.”

 

“ _Riku_ ,” Sora then calls. They both turn again to see him coming across the bridge. “Hey, Isa,” he greets the other.

 

“Welcome back,” Isa says.

 

He grins. “You too.”

 

He nods his head. “I’ll leave you two be.”

 

Riku places a hand on his shoulder before he walks away. “Thanks, Isa.”

 

With another nod of the head, he’s off. He jumps from the bridge onto the beach, joining Lea, who’s sitting at the end of the docks.

 

“This feels like a familiar scene,” Isa says as he sits to Lea’s left. He lets both legs dangle over the water while Lea has his right leg hiked up with his arm resting on his knee, as he always sits. “Haven’t we been here before?”

 

“Man, that seems so long ago now.” Lea chuckles. “Your attitude has seriously improved since then.”

 

“Well, a lot of good things have happened since then.”

 

He nods, smiling softly. He then looks over at Riku and Sora, still standing by the paopu tree. “Think those kids are gonna finally get a break?”

 

“They’re Guardians of Light. Is their job ever really complete?”

 

“So long as there’s no darkness.”

 

“There’s always going to be darkness in the world. Unfortunately, I don’t think anything will ever change that.”

 

“Well, there will always be Guardians in the world to fight it.”

 

“Yes.” He swallows hard. “And you’re one of those Guardians right now.”

 

Lea turns his head to focus on Isa. “What’s on your mind?”

 

 _I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me_. The words echo through his mind. So, Isa hesitantly returns his gaze. “Am I going to one day lose you to some impossible mission?”

 

Lea’s brow furrows ever so slightly. “I mean, I might have to go away here and there for a mission, but you’ll never lose me.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

“C’mon, you can’t get rid of me that easily.”

 

He forces a small smile. “What a shame.”

 

He nudges Isa with his elbow. “Tch. Never thought you’d be the type to use humour to try and cover up your feelings.” He then places a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “You don’t have to be afraid.”

 

He takes a deep breath. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. “What if you—you leave for a mission a-and while you’re gone, I have an episode and can’t—And what if I can’t bring myself back from it?”

 

“How many times do I have to tell you? I’ll always be there to bring you back.”

 

“I shouldn’t have to rely on you for everything.”

 

“You don’t rely on me for everything.”

 

“I shouldn’t be so mentally unstable that—”

 

“Stop. Don’t talk about yourself like that.”

 

“You can’t deny it, Lea. I am unstable.”

 

“Yeah, well, you’ve always been unstable.” Isa shoots him a dark look, causing Lea to put his hands up, as if surrendering. “Sorry. Okay. Bad joke.” He chuckles. “Unstable or not, you’re also way stronger than you believe. Than you give yourself credit for.”

 

“What if I’m strong in a way that isn’t beneficial to me?”

 

“What? Isa, that doesn’t make any sense.” He laughs more. “You do realise that all you’re doing is creating a problem for yourself that isn’t even there, right? And no matter what you say or do, you’ll never be able to push me away. You’re stuck with me.”

 

“There has to be something.” He pauses. “What if I hurt you? What if I physically injure you in a way that’s worse than—?”

 

“Stop.” He takes a deep breath. “For the record, we spent pretty much an entire decade hurting each other in some way or form. Sure, it maybe didn’t mean anything or make a difference back then, but…” He shrugs his shoulders. “Here we are. We forgave each other. And don’t you dare ask me why I forgave you. I’m not having that conversation with you _again_.”

 

Now he can’t help the chuckle. “Fair enough.”

 

“Lea, Isa,” Naminé says as she comes up behind them. “Come on, we’re all heading to Twilight Town. Sora wants to see Hayner, Pence, and Olette.” She pauses before breaking into a small fit of laughter. “And he wants ice cream.”

 

Lea grins. “I can always go for ice cream.”

 

With that, half the group makes their way for the train station while the other half returns to their ships to get to Twilight Town that way. It’s a vigorous group with Sora still being the centre of attention. He doesn’t seem to mind it one bit, either. He’s quite good at divvying out his own attention, as well, talking to each and every one of the friends he’s been reunited with.

 

“What about you, Isa?” he then says. Isa’s almost taken aback by his directness. “What’s it been like for you since being recompleted?”

 

“Oh.” He clears his throat. “It’s been quite the adjustment.”

 

Kairi giggles. “That’s what he _always_ says. He’s great, though.”

 

“Surprisingly easy to talk to,” Naminé speaks up.

 

Sora smiles. “That’s good. And I’m sure Axel made it a lot easier for you, huh?”

 

“In some ways, yes. He is a hassle in and of himself, though.”

 

Lea pushes him teasingly. “Shut up. Jerk.”

 

“Dork.”

 

Now Sora laughs. “Kairi and Naminé are right; you two really are good together.”

 

Isa blushes at this, but no one seems to notice. Thankfully. Once they’re on the train back to Twilight Town, he falls into the background again. He’s not complaining, either. And by the time they’ve arrived in Twilight Town, the others have beat them there. But they’re waiting with sea salt ice cream in hand. There’s too many of them to go to the top of the clock tower, though, so they just remain around the station and watch the sunset from the half-wall. Lea, Kairi, Demyx, Terra, Ventus, and Hayner all decide to sit on the ledge to make it more _authentic_.

 

By the time the sun has set, everyone goes their own ways. Ienzo, Demyx, Ventus, Terra, and Aqua bid their farewells and return to their worlds. Kairi, Naminé, Riku, and Sora decide to spend the night in Twilight. Kairi and Naminé stay with Xion while Riku and Sora stay with Roxas. Then Lea and Isa return to their apartment in Sunset Terrace. The peace and quiet is more than welcome, too.

 

“Today was a good day,” Lea says as soon as they’re home.

 

Isa nods. “It was.”

 

“Tired?”

 

“Exhausted.”

 

He smiles and reaches out to brush a couple strands of Isa’s hair behind his ear. “Have I told you recently that I’m proud of you.”

 

He blushes again. “I’m sure you have.”

 

He steps closer to him. “All right. Have I also told you recently that I am so in love with you?”

 

“You have, but I don’t mind hearing it again.”

 

“Good. Because I am.” He kisses him deeply. “I am so in love with you.”

 

Isa knows he should say it back, but he also knows he’s not obligated to. Instead, he opts for kissing the redhead. He kisses him and wraps his arms around his waist to pull him even closer. Lea kisses back, pushing forward and guiding Isa to the nearest wall. And when he hits it, he lets out an involuntary grunt. Lea chuckles low at this but doesn’t break the kiss. The sound just reverberates between their parted lips and it causes Isa to kiss more fiercely.

 

They finally break apart to breathe and, from there, waste no time in getting to their room. They hastily pull at each other’s clothing as Lea unzips Isa’s top and Isa unbuttons Lea’s shirt. Then they’re at each other’s pants, Lea getting Isa’s undone first, pulling them down and dropping to his knees at the same time. He kisses along Isa’s hipbones, causing him to twitch at every soft touch. As he stands again, he pushes his own bottoms down. They both kick their pants the rest of the way off before moving onto the bed. Isa crawls over Lea, admiring the way his hair is sprawled against the pillow. He gently strokes his cheek before diving in for another rough kiss. Lea responds by rutting his hips up against Isa’s. They both groan at the friction. Isa reaches down with one hand to press and hold Lea’s hips to the mattress. The redhead groans again at the resistance. Isa smirks before pulling away to kiss at his neck. Lea turns his head to give him more space to work with. So, Isa kisses and nips along his jawline. And when his hair gets tugged at, he returns his lips to the other pair. Lea nips at Isa’s bottom lip, causing him to almost growl.

 

During these moments, when they’re both at their most vulnerable, Isa is no longer afraid. He isn’t afraid of losing Lea. He isn’t afraid of losing himself. This sort of vulnerability is convivial, somehow. Comforting. The way Lea watches him and touches him and moves with him… It drives him crazy. A good kind of crazy. A desirable kind of crazy. Better yet, when Lea starts _talking_ and telling Isa exactly what he wants, it drives him over the edge. The way he says Isa’s name in that breathless tone; it’s all Isa wants to hear. And in these moments, when their bodies are pressed as close together as possible, Isa forgets everything. Everything except the redhead. They’re the only two people in existence and he’ll never trade that feeling for the world. It feels real. True. It’s a fire raging beneath his skin and he has absolutely no desire to extinguish it. He just wants every piece of Lea he can have. Every shaky breath. Every desperate touch. Almost like they’re still not close enough.

 

The final kiss is a crash of unaligned lips. Bruising. They’re panting into each other’s open mouths. They’re skin is hot and sticky, but that doesn’t stop them from holding onto each other. And they hold on until they fall asleep.

 

When Isa wakes up, he’s alone in the bed. He feels Lea’s side to find that it isn’t warm, so he’s been up for a while. He turns back to check the time. 8:36a. Huh. Perhaps he was due in for an early shift at the café without Isa realising it. Except he smells coffee. And it still smells fresh.

 

Rather than continuing to create conclusions in his head, he decides to get out of bed and investigate. He grabs the first pair of pants he finds and makes his way for the kitchen. When he enters, he finds Lea sitting patiently at the table. And placed upon it is—

 

“A paopu fruit?” Isa says.

 

“Yeah.” Lea smiles. “I snagged one from the tree on the Islands.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Kairi was telling me the legend behind them. How when two people share a paopu fruit, their destinies become intertwined forever. No matter what.”

 

He folds his arms across his chest. “Is that so?”

 

“It is.”

 

“And why exactly did you take one?”

 

“Because I figured we could try it.”

 

“Lea, please, I think the last decade has proven quite well that we’ll always be a part of each other’s lives. Do we really need some mystical fruit to ensure that?”

 

“Maybe I want to guarantee it.”

 

“You don’t think we’ll last without the mystical fruit?”

 

“Shut up. That’s not what I meant, and you know it.”

 

He shakes his head at him, chuckling. He then sits across from him at the table. “Fine. If you insist.”

 

Lea smiles again. He enthusiastically picks the star-shaped fruit up, holding it by one of its points and offering it to Isa. He plays along, taking hold of the other downward point. From there, they each break off a piece of the sideward points. They place the fruit back on table before exchanging the pieces they broke off. And, at the same time, they eat the pieces of the fruit.

 

“Well?” Isa speaks up once he’s swallowed his piece. “Do you feel any different?”

 

Lea grins. “I feel like I can take on the world with you.”

 

It’s a ridiculous statement, but that doesn’t stop Isa from blushing in response. “And what exactly are you fighting?”

 

“Any doubts that come our way. Any fears that try to tear us apart. Any person who tries telling us we’ll never be able to make it work.” He reaches across the table and takes Isa’s hands in his own. “This is exactly where I wanna be. Today. Tomorrow. Next month. A decade from now.”

 

His blush only deepens. “A decade is a long time.”

 

“I know. I already lost one with you, so I’m sure as hell not gonna lose another.”

 

“Anything can happen, Lea. Sometimes life gets in the way.”

 

“You’re right. I won’t deny that. But I’m willing to fight the odds because I know we can beat the odds.”

 

“Always the optimist.”

 

“What’s wrong that?”

 

“I didn’t say anything was wrong with it.”

 

“Hmm.” He slides into the next chair to be closer to Isa. “I know you have your concerns and I know they’re mostly based around your episodes, but you have to trust yourself. I trust you. Plus, you’ve been really good lately. That writing thing Naminé suggested has done wonders. You also haven’t broken another mirror.” Isa chuckles sheepishly at this, so Lea laughs softly as well. “I get that it’s tough for you to believe you’re getting better, but you are.”

 

He swallows hard. “I still see yellow from time to time.”

 

He nods his head. “I know you do. But you don’t have as many nightmares as you used to, and your episodes aren’t as real as they used to be.”

 

“How would you know that?”

 

“When was the last time you thought you saw Xemnas or heard him talking to you?” Lea sits back while Isa thinks about this. No immediate memory comes to mind, though. And the redhead knows this is the case. “Exactly,” he goes on. “Your episodes aren’t nearly as bad as they were in the very beginning.”

 

“That doesn’t mean they’ve gone away completely. Ienzo said that they could stop for a while, and then come back even worse.”

 

“If that’s the case, then so be it. We’ll deal with that when we get to that point.”

 

“How can you be so nonchalant?”

 

“Because I know how to snap you out of it.” He smiles as he leans forward, cupping Isa’s cheek. “ _Come back to me_.”

 

The blush returns as Isa covers Lea’s hand with his own. “And I always come back.” He closes his eyes. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

 

“I know you’re not.”

 

He opens his eyes again to meet that vibrant green gaze. “You seem to know everything, don’t you?”

 

“Everything about you.”

 

He leans forward a bit. “Then what am I thinking right now?” Lea doesn’t respond. Just smiles and closes the distance between them to kiss Isa fondly. “I’d call that an educated guess,” he says once they break away. “Still a good guess, however.”

 

He laughs, his tone light. “What can I say?” He leans back, bringing his hands behind his head. “You’re pretty easy to read. Y’know, like an open book.”

 

“ _I’m_ an open book?”

 

“Yeah. I think that’s what happens when you give your heart to someone.”

 

He considers this for a moment. “I don’t think my heart has ever been mine,” he says. He looks up at Lea. “I think it’s always belonged to you.”

 

He leans forward again. “I’ll keep it safe. And that’s a promise.”

 

Promises aren’t easy to keep, but Isa trusts Lea with his life. With his entire being. With his heart. And while the previous decade had been filled with broken oaths and lies and secrets of betrayal, it’s in the past. If Lea and Isa are to move on with their lives, they can’t allow the past to get in the way. _Isa_ can’t allow the past to get in the way. It shouldn’t have any sort of hold on him anymore. When he starts slipping, though, all he has to do is look at Lea. That smile is enough to light up the darkness. Enough to bring him back. Then he feels safe again. He feels at home. He _feels_.

 

After spending a decade believing he had no heart, the rush of emotions he experienced when he first returned was overwhelming. And the last thing he felt was relief. He only felt guilt and shame and unworthiness. It wasn’t until he saw Lea again—saw Lea for the first time as Isa—that he felt relief. When he saw Lea and he saw him smile and his eyes were brimming with tears rather than showcasing anger and fault, he felt…warmth. He had been so fearful that Lea would shun him, but now he feels foolish for believing he ever would’ve done so. Lea fought for him. Stood up for him. Even when Isa believed he was too far gone, the redhead still tried to stop him. To bring him back.

 

Now Isa gets to sit with Lea at this kitchen table every morning. He gets to drink coffee with him every morning. Hell, he gets _wake up_ next to him every single morning. He gets to hold his hand and kiss him whenever he wants. And that smile… That expression Lea is using to look at him right now—like he’s deeply in love with Isa—is reserved strictly for him. This is the life Isa wants. It’s the life he deserves. It took him this long to realise and accept that, so he’s never letting it go. And if suffering through the last decade is the only thing that would’ve brought him to this point, then it was worth it. And if looking in a mirror every single day for the rest of his life is what keeps them together, then that’ll be worth it, too.

 

Isa takes Lea’s hand and kisses the back of it. “I’m gonna take a shower.”

 

Lea nods and smiles. “I’ll have coffee ready by the time you’re out.”

 

With that, he makes his way for the bathroom. The shower is quick, as always. When he steps out, he wraps one towel around his waist and grabs another to dry his hair. He leaves the bathroom to move into the bedroom and grab his hairbrush before returning to the bathroom. He brushes the tangles out and gets to work on braiding his hair. Once it’s tied off, he places his hands on the vanity.

 

Speaking of mirrors…

 

He stares down his reflection. He takes a deep breath. In through the nose. Out through the mouth. He looks closely at his eyes, a small part of him fearing the flecks of yellow. Hmm. Maybe they’re an actual part of his irises. Maybe he’s imagining them. Maybe—He swallows hard.

 

Lea appears in the mirror behind him. He wraps his arms around Isa’s waist and rests his chin on his shoulder. He smiles at him through the reflection. “I love your eyes.”

 

Isa can’t help the blush that spreads across his cheeks. “You’re just saying that.”

 

“C’mon, we talked about this. I can tell when you’re slipping. The fact that you’re staring so intensely at your reflection is usually a good giveaway, too.” He kisses at his neck. “Doesn’t mean I don’t love your eyes, though.” The kisses trail down to Isa’s still bared shoulder. “I love every part of you. Everything about who you are.”

 

His cheeks flush deeper. “Shut up.”

 

He grins. “Coffee’s ready.” And he walks out.

 

Isa watches the doorway until Lea turns the corner of the kitchen. He then stares back at his reflection. At the face he’s been looking at for over a decade. A face he once would’ve called unrecognisable, but now… Now he understands that his features don’t define him. The perpendicular scars perfectly aligned across the bridge of his nose don’t define him. Scars are a sign of strength. They tell stories of survival. The signify he was able to fight his demons. His demon was a lesser version of himself. A version of himself who shared this same body. This same face. Who he was as a Nobody also doesn’t define him, though. _Saïx_ doesn’t define him. That’s not who he is.

 

He’s Isa. And he’s okay. More than okay. He’s happy. He’s in love. He’s not afraid of his past and he’s ready to face the future.

 

He’s ready to exist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe we've reached the end already. Like, I seriously cannot believe four months have already passed x.x  
> I just wanna give one final shout out all my readers and to everyone who took the time to leave me such amazing comments. I'm so glad you all enjoyed reading this story as much as enjoyed writing it. This has been a wonderful experience and there will be more to come. Trust me, I have plenty of ideas lmao
> 
> For more shenanigans, feel free to follow me on tumblr and twitter:  
> tumblr ~ fandominmybrain-shipsinmyeyes  
> twitter ~ @FireStar08
> 
> Thanks again everyone!! <3 <3


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